Im gay and i dont know how to tell my family.....help?

Answer 1

OK, Do you have a good relationship with your parents? Do you know how they feel on gay issues, like when it was all over the news about gay marriage?Do you have any siblings, that know?If the answers to these are all good I would sit down with both of your parents privately and just tell them, that is if you know that you are gay for sure. If you do not think they are going to be acceptable to the issue at hand, I would probably wait(depending on your age and circumstances), you don't want them to freak out and kick you out or something like that, not saying it will happen, I don't know them. Good luck and let us know what happens....

Answer 2

Do any of your friends know? If so, talk to them... they probably know your parents a little better than anyone on here could guess, and they might help you devise a plan of action. If none of your friends know, maybe this is a good opportunity to let one or two of your best friends in on the secret.

If you don't want to go with that idea. try talking to another grown-up about it first. Maybe a trusted teacher or school counselor, or a family friend or relative.

Any way you choose to tell them, I'm sure it will be a big burden off your mind. Besides, I bet they'll tell you they already knew. Parents are very perceptive.

Good luck!

Answer 3

Be honest. They will, in part, take their cue from you: If you are lacking in shame, functional, assured and leading a life that you are happy with they will find the news easier to take. Most parents who are devastated at the news feel as they do because of what they percieve gay people to be.....unhappy and dysfunctional. Get to a place in your own head where you are comfortable with your life and your sexuality......if you are not already.
Some people find it easier to "practice" with a friend or sibling before they tackle the parents. Prepare yourself for the possibility that tears may be shed, they may blame each other, and forbid you to tell anyone else in the family. They may also insist on counseling. This is not a bad idea........especially if you go together so that they can aquire the tools and information to come to accept who you are. I guess my point is this: there may never be a time when they are *ready* to hear the news; it is up to you to be *ready* to tell them.
Good luck.

Answer 4

You may be surprised, mothers especially seem to have their own gaydar installed :)
There are a couple of ways you can go about it.
You can wait: act as you do normally and wait for one of them to ask you.
You can tell them both together, but its best not to do it at the christmas dinner table, at birthdays ect.
Or you could even have a chat to whoever you feel more comfortable with, if its your mother, sit down and have a chat about it then she would be able to tell your father.
At the end of the day they should realise that if they are against it they would be losing a son, what's better? A son found dead due to drugs overdose or a gay son who is happy? sounds a bit extreme but if they can look at it from that angle it shouldnt be too much of a problem :)

Answer 5

I actually asked my parents what they would say to me if I told them that I was gay. So they asked me, if I was gay, and I said yes.

I had to tell them because I'm afraid that my friends would tell them first, or find out from somebody else. I would want them to hear it from me rather than from anybody else.

But it is really helpful, if you can make friends with gay people first. You will get a sense of support from them, and hopefully will gain the strength to tell your parents that you are gay.

We wish you all the luck!

Answer 6

Thank you For Answering my Question! I Am Gay and I dont realy know how to tell him, what did your friend say when you told him exactly!

Answer 7

Just don't. If you think it will greatly upset them or if they hate gays and you think they may commit suicide because you're gay and you feel the blood is on your hands, just don't do it. If they are accepting of gays then you could probably let them know without any problems by inviting your boyfriend over and just introducing him as "my boyfriend."

Answer 8

I came out to my mom and brother by writing them each a letter. I handed my mom the letter and sat with her when she read it. She of course was shocked, and said I was going through a phase. She still has trouble with it, wont talk about her, but I know she loves me. (Im in a long distance relationship) So we see each other 3-4 times a year, she came up in Jul and my mom was decent to her.

I wrote a letter and emailed it to my brother, as he lives out of town, he was surprisingly supportive, as long as I was happy he said.

Good luck! Remember your heart knows no gender, be strong, be happy.

Answer 9

The first advice I'd give is for you to find a support group (or two) that offers compassion and understanding, such as PFLAG. There are usually communities/support groups in larger cities so depending on where you live you may need to do a little traveling, but it will be worth it.
http://www.pflag.org/
http://www.pflag.org/Get_Support.coming_out.0.html

Visiting websites that support coming out, such as Human Rights Campaign, can help. http://www.hrc.org/Template.cfm?Section=Coming_Out

And joining on-line discussion forums that are positive and supportive, such as BeliefNet’s Gay Community Forum might help.
http://www.beliefnet.com/boards/discussion_list.asp?boardID=387

In community forums (like BeliefNet’s) where anti-gay remarks or gay-bashing is not allowed, you might find more support for coming out; rather than in communities like this (Yahoo! Questions), where any and all remarks are allowed, regardless of how rude, disrespectful or hurtful they may be.

Also, these websites usually have quite a few suggestions on how to come out in a positive way that is respectful of others and yourself. As well as coming out stories from other people that might give you some ideas.

But the absolute most important thing you can do, regardless of how you come out to your family, is to have a support network. Whether it’s in-person (such as a pflag meeting or a gay-friendly church group) or on-line, a group can offer advice and support. When you are ready to come out to your family, your support group will be there for you no matter how things turn out. If things don’t go so well they will be there to comfort you; if things go well they will be there to cheer for you.

When you are ready to come out to your family, there are so many ways to do it. The BEST way is to do what ever feels right to you. There is no "wrong" or "right" way, and no one else can tell you what’s right for you.

I told my sister that I was going on a date….with a woman. Then we both laughed, pretty hard, and then we hugged. I hinted around with my mom, albeit rather big hints such as “I’m going to a lesbian bar in Baltimore this weekend” or “that girl is really cute”, etc. I told one co-worker after hearing her talk, in a nice way, about her sister-in-law who is gay. I could tell from the way that she talked about her sister-in-law that she was not prejudice against gays. I was worried about telling some of my other co-workers and my boss. (In fact, I was worried that I would end up losing my job, and I have two kids to support!) I ended up bringing my girlfriend to a work party where I knew other people would be bringing their spouses and significant others. The co-workers who I had already come out to were very supportive and made me and my girlfriend feel comfortable. My point with all of this is, each way I came out to someone was different, but right for me at that time. The way I came out to my Mom definitely wouldn’t have worked with my boss, and the way I came out to my boss wouldn’t have felt right or comfortable with my Mom.

Do what feels right for you. You know your family better than anyone on Yahoo! Questions. The “how” to do it doesn’t really matter.

Good Luck!

Answer 10

if they are good humored, gather them in your room, go into your closet, close it, jump out and say TA DA I'm Gay.

but most likely your going to have to just sit down and talk with them. See how they act around homosexual thing: movies with gay men or ask questions.