Should I be worried if I want to have sex more than my boyfriend?

Question

My boyfriend and I Have sex once or twice a week, but I want it more. It makes me feel unattractive that he doesn't want it more because I read a lot that guys want it more than women usually. I also normally have to wait until he initiates it and it is normally after he has looked at porn online. It makes me feel unattractive even though he tells me I'm sexy all the time. There are also times he will start to passionately makeout with me like he wants to have sex and then he will stop all of a sudden and just say he's tired...any advise would be great. Thanks

Answer 1

I don't know what to tell you except that you are normal. Your boyfriend should be told not to start something that he does not intent to finish. Maybe he needs to spend more time with you a real woman and less time on line looking at porn.

Answer 2

You got a sticky situation on your hands, but I'm going to stay positive with it. SPICE is the variety of life (or is it the other way around)! Sex can get repetitive if it's the same or feels the same. We ladies also have a problem sometimes with our boyfriend's request to try different things. but let me tell you... if you don't some one will. And that's no lie honey. Sounds like he's getting bored with it. I don't know how you are sexually, but do something that is going to please him yet make you feel comfortable. Ask him! Just for conversation.. and then you put it on him... here's some ideas...
1. Role play
2. Be his OWN personal porn star
3. YOU TAKE CHARGE.. men love it...
4. Do a strip tease
5. Watch a porno together
6. Simply do the unexpected

I have did the majority of the things on that list and my man can't get enough and the sex is never the same. We try different positions, make up new ones... lol, just have fun with it. And if you tried any or all of those and he's still actin like that.. than it ain't you it's him... Good Luck

Answer 3

I've had that problem before, with the not interested until he's looked at porn thing. I know where you're coming from. I think it is a myth that guys want it more than girls, but you have to decide if you are happy to put your needs on the back burner and wait for him. I did that and regret it. It's not fair to you that he withholds sex. If a girl did that to a guy they would complain about blueballs, or that the girl is a tease, etc...

I really think that you should dump him and get a new boyfriend, I wish I had been given the same advise!

Answer 4

Maybe look at the type of porn that he is looking at. That might give an indication of where he feels there is a discrepency between what he wants and what he gets. Does he like big chested women, is he into animals, little boys, etc. This may assist you in understanding his motivations.
If that doesn't work, start downloading pictures of guys with huge ducks. When he asks what you're doing, tell him that seeing guys with long hard ducks really turns you on. Maybe he'll understand how you feel and be more sensitive.

Answer 5

I understand the uncertainty in your relationship, but that's something you'll have to let him know bothers you. And if he really is an understanding guy then maybe he'll tone it down a bit and allow you to initiate.
But the thing about guys wanting it more then girls is false. Any gender can have high sex drives, especially if it's their first time and it was a good experience.
Talk to him about it and see what's up. If he doesn't see how it's making you feel insecure then maybe he's not the guy you'd want to be with after all. I mean guys who care about your feelings too is something that you should definitely look for. Good luck, Sara.

Answer 6

He's just not that into you and when he's up for it, he'll do you. When he's tired, he won't bother. Besides, you're not as hot as what he sees in porn, so you can't expect to hold the attention of a man who can only get turned on when he looks at it.
Dump any man who makes you feel unattractive or insecure.

Answer 7

yup worry,

I've been married almost 20 years and my wife has NEVER initiated it.

I ALWAYS have to work really hard to even get her maybe into the mood, I'm giving up lately. Maybe porn is better. Maybe lots of beer is better. I do like to hold her at night and she likes it too. She has nice boobs too and is warm. I HAVE to get more though. She knows it too. Wierdness and no honest communication, especially about sex. I want some girlfriends, would tell her too.

Answer 8

Well I would be angry if it took porn to get my husband in the mood, but as far as wanting to have sex more than him, I'm in the same sit. and I think that if there's a big age diff. or if he works hard often that should be taken into consideration, if you don't feel anything along those lines could be a factor then maybe you should re-evaluate who you're with and what would make you happy

Answer 9

Maybe you should come on to him, my boyfriend and i had sex constantly and he stoppng coming on to me all of a sudden, and i thought the worst, but it wasn't even that he just felt like he was the only one that wanted sex and that i was just going with the flow, so i started coming on to him and it made him feel like i wanted him, maybe you should try to come on to him, set the mood right and let it happen if that doesn't work then maybe there is a chance he might be getting it else where good luck to you don't be afraid to let him know when you want sex its natural its better than you getting it elsewhere..

Answer 10

Talk 2 him about it. Don't just let it slide sex is important in a relationship & it is okay for u 2 want it more 7 more. Ask him y he doesn't want 2 respond then c what happens if he gives u an answer that u don't like then find yourself a real man