I think about ending it all. Am i alone?

Question

Sometimes think about doing it the drastic way. Other times, just upping and leaving..... no planning, judst get up one morning and dissapear.

I have a good job (with its pressures, but that can be good someties i suppose), i have a boyf who likes me.... but is in army and away a lot. I have my own house, but live alone.

Just cant put my finger on it.... what would make any difference if stayed or went?

Answer 1

You are not alone. It is I would think a common human thought, since all humans experience pain and suffering. Thinking about ending it all can actually be a very life-affirming experience. Doing it of course isn't.

"For those who contemplate suicide, life is beautiful" - Max Weber

If you live past the thought then you are living intentionally instead of by accident. If you survived the thought even once then there must have been a reason. Search for it and you will find it. Get help if you need it.

We all suffer but always remember that suffering can be overcome.

Answer 2

This can be a very difficult subject, since nobody has a right to tell someone they should or should not 'end it all'. Nobody knows exactly how any individual feels about everything, and how their life really is. Walk a mile in someone else's shoes comes to mind. Reaching out to others does not always solve the problem, either, but it can be helpful.

However--not matter what kind of life you think you are leaving or escaping from, you will leave it WORSE if you end it, get it?

You are an integral part of the existing time continuum around you, you touch everyone you meet, everyone you are involved with, and you are there for a reason. For instance, you being there for you bf may be the SOLE REASON he is still alive, he is being careful so that he can return to YOU. Get it? Your little sisters and brothers would miss you TERRIBLY. Your folks would be immensely sad for the duration of their lives if you ended it, even if you were NOT close to them. You would leave a HOLE in the world.

If you have a good job, a good bf, and essentially a good life, why not look at all of the good things you have in it? You are blessed.
Why throw it all away? Everyone gets 'down' once in a while, that is absolutely NORMAL, and loneliness is too. Keep occupied, take up bungee-jumping, knitting, ice climbing, track and field, horesback riding, skateboarding, volunteer your valuable time to others less blessed, and most importantly, get involved in fundraising for the needy, establish a REASON to survive, keep your faith, and trust in God, you shall be FINE. Know you ARE loved and cherished and you are worthy of living happily.
Good luck!

Answer 3

No, you're definitely not alone.

I too have a great job, a great family, lovely wife and a beautiful daughter, but I had a lot of pressure from a long term illness and a very awkward family fall out. I was depressed.

It took a lot of courage, but I went to the doctor and he has helped immensely. I was depressed and am now coping really well with mix of counselling and meds. Depression is chemical, not emotional, there is nothing you can do about it. It happens and the pressures in your life may have brought this on.

I have slef-harmed, been suicidal and have managed to come through and I pray you'll do the same. If you ever want to talk, let me know.

Would it matter if you stayed or went ? Yes, it would matter. You would leave a gaping hole in the lives of your friends and family. The fact that you've asked the question shows you still have a lot to give, so please, please, don't be alone, help is there and so am I, if ever needed.

Answer 4

It would make a big difference.

Don't do anything silly. At one time or another EVERYONE has felt really low, I know I have but all you can do is ride it out and trust me the good times will come and you'll look back and know you done the right thing by staying.

I remember not so long ago I thought I couldn't go on any more I was a single parent and I was really lonely, I was thinking it would be better for me to end everything and that the kids would be better off without me because I could offer them nothing..... But I carried on and I'm so glad I did and one day you will too.

You need some tough and hard times in your life so you can appreciate the good times more.
I'm praying for you, take care.

Answer 5

Hey sister - your fellow depressives are a BIG club welcome.
Dont do it its not worth it their is gold at the other end of the rainbow. Only two things ever did me any good when down -
sleeping pills (mild) to help me get off when I was hardly sleeping at all. As for the rest steer clear of vallium and the like. #They do not help really just block some of the symptoms bbut they fry the brain.
The only way out is to pick yourself up boot yourself in the *** and get on with the rest of your life. It will only happen when you are ready to do it.

Mind

In the lost dark lonely caverns of the thing that we call mind
Live all the old-world terrors that we thought we’d left behind!
They come out to haunt us when our psyche is way down low,
It really is a wonder just how they seem to know.

They turn our dreams to rubble and destroy our self esteem,
They drive us to distraction to where we cannot even dream.
They cause us endless trouble they lead to no known land,
They are the enemies of progress an ever taunting band.

I have tried to re-establish my belief that I can be,
Anything I want to - but mostly that I am free.
I call for help. I plead to die. I cry my misery.
I run in circles hour on hour hoping the sun to see.

There is no-one in these caverns to show me the way home,
There is no apparent entry from where my help could come.
Here I have been forever – so it seems to me.
What was my crime what did I do why can’t I even see.

They call it a depression suggest all kinds of things,
But they cannot make a difference I am lost in my own Hell
Then when much time has passed – day’s week’s months, even years
I find myself; I heal my wounds wash dress smile and kill my fears.

I think back to the caverns and wonder why it should be
That they are now completely different from the ones I used to see.
They are brightly lit and welcoming a wonder to behold,
Full of all life’s treasures glittering with gems and gold!

Answer 6

you feel alone because you choose to be. go out, visit your families and friends, have fun, talk to people, join a group - perhaps enrol in a gym or dance class, anything to keep you busy and occupied. there are a lot of things you can do. people will not come to you, you have to make an effort to meet them, to talk to them, to be somebodies friend/mate.

it would make a lot of difference if you stay! your family and boyfriend will miss you. you also have to ask your boyfriend whether he truly loves you and that you heading into something deeper and meaningful. ask him to be honest with you and be prepared to accept his answer!

If you and your boyfriend are not serious about each other, you may go somewhere and start a new life! it is an option for you but make sure you will not make the same mistake again. find somebody who will be with you when you need him.

good luck and i hope that everything will turn out well!

Answer 7

I can fully understand you and where you are coming from. It is always sad when someone gets to the position and thought that you are in that the only solution is to die.

I really hope that you don't do this as it would be a loss to us all.

I too went through this question on 2nd September, I too believed that it was best to end it all.

Please seek some help from those nearest to you or try the Samaritans, anything but ending it all. Are you alone, no you are not alone. Want to know how I beat my feelings of wanting to end it all? Email me through the forum email service. I would be happy to help you, please!

Answer 8

No way, you're not alone.
Just do what makes you feel happy. You only live once.
Boy, am I glad you didn't mean "ending it all" the other way. Although I suspect you would not be alone in that either. Actually, I know.
Good Luck sweetie.

Answer 9

I know what you mean, I think we all have a part of us that wants to get it over with ! It's what makes us human mate, but surviving and getting on with it is what makes us super-human ! Just take each day as it comes. When my fella goes away, I try to find the positives like (bit mundane I know but..) I can watch what I like on T.V. .....have beans on toast for tea if I want to......go out on the raz wi' my old mates without having to say what time i'll be in... you get my drift ?
There's no point disapearing cos you can't hide from yourself I'm afraid. Set your self some challenges, get the adrenanlin flowing, do something that scares you every day to make yourself feel alive, feel the fear and do it anyway ! come on you can...... say it .......I CAN, I CAN, I CAN !
Good Luck Mate, and please don't let the Bastards grind you down !! Love from KebabLamb : ) X

Answer 10

Hi
no your are most certainly not alone! And it is teribble that you feel that way, what a shame. But it is good that you have put this message out. Perhaps there is someone else you can talk to?a friend, or neighbour? Is there a specific problem that you can deal with? or perhaps you just feel depressed - do talk to someone - there is nmuch that can be done to help you feel like a weight has been lifted and happier. Your boyfriend shoud adore you, not just like you! :o)) Good luck