My wife is pregnant and the doctor has put her on semi-bed rest becuase their is a chance of early labor. She is allowed to work for a few hours and rest the majority of the day.
Shje is getting annoyed with me because I won' let her do anything while she's home. She is getting restless laying around all day and wants to get up and do stuff (clean, cook, etc). I then proceed to start nagging her making sure she gets the required rest she needs.
How do I get a good balance between helping keep our baby safe and helping my wife keep her sanity??
2006-10-05 08:22:30 · 20 answers · asked by PADRE 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Your wife probably has 2 problems right now. Thinking you can't do things as well as she can, and going crazy not being able to do things herself.
Ask her advice, that will make her feel useful. Ask her how she wants you to do things, that will make her feel like you are trying to do things her way.
Buy her some crossword puzzle books, handheld video games, if you don't have a tv in your bedroom or wherever she's resting it might be worth investing in one for her.
Good luck to you, and to her also!
2006-10-05 08:27:36 · answer #1 · answered by Michelle *The Truth Hurts 6 · 7⤊ 0⤋
I agree with the first comment/answer, she needs to do what's best for the baby!! Please trust me, my dear friend Aunt was told the same thing, but she didn't listen...she was up doing dishes when the she went into labour, but because the baby hadn't gone full term the poor things lungs hadn't developed properly and she died :(
Your wife will have all the time in the world to move around when that baby is born, she won't have a choice, I have 2 children of my own and had to slow down near the end of second and did it without complaint. Hell I'd give both my legs if I had to.
But your wife is going through something that can be very trying and stressful on woman's body, the hormones alone can make you crazy I know, so just try and be supportive perhaps find something for her to do in bed a nice hobby or something. But I still believe you have to be firm in this, she doesn't want to lose that baby, no one would...if she continues to force the topic of moving around call your doctor and make an appointment for her to see him, let the doc know your concerns and let the professional talk to her again, maybe she will listen next time.
Good Luck, and I hope your baby is born happy and healthy!!!
Live, Love & Laugh,
Michelle
2006-10-05 08:32:30 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make a deal with her. First let her know that doctor's orders are for a reason. Second, remind her of the guilt and utter remorse she would feel if she did something to harm the baby or god forbid, terminate the pregnancy. Say, if you stay off your feet all week and let me help US get us through this time I will let you cook an easy supper once a week. If she is allowed to work a few hours a day she should be allowed to cook for 1/2 hour to hour once a week. Just watch her in an inconspicuous way to make sure she isn't overdoing it. Let her know it's not forever and what a great outcome this whole thing will have!
2006-10-05 09:00:57 · answer #3 · answered by ashpea2002 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe your wife doesn't truly understand what can happen if she delivers a premature baby. How far along is she? I was put on bed rest with both of my girls and they were still born early, but I got the rest that I was told to get. I even had to quit my job.
I gave birth at 23 weeks and 28 weeks gestation. The two of you need to watch a show on premature birth. Let her see what her baby looks like, she needs to know how serious it is to have a premie. My girls only weighed 1 lb. 3 1/2 oz. and 2 lb. 1 oz. I think that once she is able to see how difficult it is from a baby born to soon then she will know in her heart that she wants to do any and everything she can to prevent that from happening to her own child. I hope the two of you make it through this and that she is able to carry your baby to full term. GOOD LUCK!
2006-10-05 08:33:18 · answer #4 · answered by wilsonhutchison04 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1) if you can afford it, hire a cook and a maid (or 1 person to do both?), so she can stop using that stuff as an excuse. make sure she likes the person and has a say in *how* the person does things.
2) you have a bunch of good suggestions there for how to keep her entertained while in bed, so i'd go with whichever of those go with her personality / tastes. (i would also say she can use the laptop to chat on pregnancy websites and talk to other women going thru the same / or similar thing!)
3) if possible, try to convince her that this an adventure (it is!!)... even an experiment... as a sebatical from her regular life, while waiting for the baby! have her use the time to relax, to play, to have fun, before her life will be turned upside down! also, it might be fun to read up on baby stuff/parenting/baby names.
you sound like you're gonna be a great dad! good luck!! =)
2006-10-05 08:33:04 · answer #5 · answered by melon_rose 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you are doing great! Find things for your wife to do while she is laying around (i.e. puzzles, movies, good food) she will still be a little restless. It is hard for productive women to stop working, this just proves that she will be a great mother and the fact that you are so concerned shows you will be a great father. Just be light for the pregnancy time and keep in mind that your wife has concerns too so she might just be stressing out for a little while. Don't worry to much it should turn out fine.
2006-10-05 08:43:51 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
she's only getting restless b/c she feels like she's not helping any and you are doing it all. Make a deal with her, you do the heavy stuff and she can do the light stuff. maybe instead of cooking the full meal she can sit down and prep the food (cutting, seasoning, etc) can't really get around the cleaning since she would have to be up and about, but maybe she can rest on the couch and fold the laundry. end result...let her help with anything she can do sitting down or laying down that will help with the household stuff.
as treat just to get her out of the house one day maybe surprise her sometime and take her to the salon to get a manicure and pedicure (cause she won't be able to reach them soon...lol)
2006-10-05 08:33:53 · answer #7 · answered by Get_R_Done_n_Dallas 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have one of her friends go over and visit with her. If you are working during the day send her some flowers or a teddy bear or something. Go to the drug store and make a little care package, with some good magazines, a crossword puzzle book, some pencils, and some good snacks. Or go buy a baby book and have her start filling it out. I hope this helps. Go rent a movie, bring home some take out, and some sparkling cider and curl up on the couch with her.
2006-10-05 09:13:08 · answer #8 · answered by Hilly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Im pregnant too and I want to do things that I shouldnt do at times. Sometimes I get really frusterated with my fiance because he makes me do what I should be doing. Make sure she has things to do. Buy her her favorite Magazine, put on the TV call her if youre at work and dont let the house get too dirty otherwise you have to expect her to get up to clean. But overall, its the best for your baby and she'll appreciate it in the end. (after the hormones slow down lol) Hope this helped a little.,
2006-10-05 08:41:24 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is more than likely getting bored just laying around not doing anything, especially since is accustomed to cleaning and cooking. So try to play cards or some type of board games with her or go out and rent some movies and pop some popcorn and just have movie nights. This should make her feel better and take her mind off of things.
2006-10-05 08:27:21 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋