We hadn't been as close during my abusive marriage. but we started hanging out I found out she was playing w/drugs w/her brother-Coke and Meth. She was also taking alot of OTC and prescription meds-sleep stuff, enough anti-depressants and pain meds to melow a cow. She parked her car in a canal bc she was high and drunk and out with a "new" guy in an unfamiliar part of town. In the mean time I met a great man and we hit off. She got jealous and through a guilt trip on me. She just made really bad choices for herself that usually got her into bad situations. She almost got raped twice because she was meeting guys on chat lines and then driving to meet them late @ night. for the last 2 months she has only called when she needs something or when she wants to ***** about how bad her life sucks. I feel used and I don't really have a friend anymore. Just a needy, negative person who blames her problems on everyone else and she she gets mean when I tell something good happened to me.
2006-10-05 06:11:15 · 16 answers · asked by Big Red 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Yes you were right. I'm sorta going through what you are right now(just not the drugs). Its obvious that all she cares aboutis herself. She wants you to be miserable just like her and since your not shes taking all of her frustrations out on you. If she was your best friend then she wouldn't be doing this to you, she should be very happy for you and want to talk about your life as well as hers. She needs counseling(thats what i told my best friend). Its not going to be easy if she does goto counseling. I hardly talk to my best friend anymore(long story) since we had our fight. If she doesn't get the help she defintely needs then I would stop being friends with her. Your life is going good right now and you don't need a negative person around you complaining about her life all of the time. IF you do decide to stay friends with her no matter what I wouldn't tell her if anything good happens in your life......which isn't fair to you, best friends are suppose to tell each other everything. Thats what I would do if I was you. Feel free to email anytime...hope this helps and good luck.
2006-10-05 06:58:40 · answer #1 · answered by Heather A 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How sad. Having released yourself from an abusive marriage, I understand your not wanting to take on someone else's baggage. Your best friend needs a friend right now. Still, self preservation is the first order of business. Take care of yourself. Sometimes friends must travel separate paths to find each other again later in life. You've paid your dues and don't need this baggage right now. Enjoy your new relationship. Let the friend travel her own path until she comes to her senses.
Pray for her. Be there if she wants to really make a change. That is the best you can do.
2006-10-05 06:18:54 · answer #2 · answered by Chris 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She needs an intervention. Talk to her family members and see if they care enough to come together and give her one. She is probably still a good friend...the drugs are masking it though. If you feel you've done all you can, then it's time to just move on with your life. There's only so much you can do to help someone without hurting yourself in the process. Hopefully she'll realize what the drugs are doing and get into rehab to kick the habit, maybe then you can go back to being friends and support her for doing the right thing.
Good Luck
2006-10-05 06:18:44 · answer #3 · answered by makeitclap23 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
HAve you tried maybe finding some help for her? That might help your friendship. She needs someone to watch out for her now. She doesn't mean to come across as negative or jealous but she is because she wants the same things you have. The drug free life, the great man, and just plain happiness. I don't think you should give up on her just yet. Good luck with everything and don't let her get you down...you need to bring her up.
2006-10-05 06:21:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you feel this lady was dragging you down then yes I would end the relationship for now, but being a good friend I would also tell her " when you get your life on track give me a call, I have a very good friend who married a woman I cannot stand but after having him out of my life for a while I decided to overlook her and be the friend that I used to be. I hope these words help.
2006-10-05 06:16:05 · answer #5 · answered by snoop_dougie_doug04 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wrong only if you haven't tried to help her. But if you tried to help her out and give her advice and support to deal with her sh!t then your not wrong at all. I always say "help me, help you".
If she wants to blame everything thats wrong in her life on someone else then you need go on with your life and don't worry about her. If she saw you as a true friend she would come around and if not then there is nothing you can do.
Go do you and have fun with your life.
2006-10-05 06:20:02 · answer #6 · answered by DLB 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you tried to help her? If not, it wouldn't hurt to put in one last effort to help her get her life back. If you already did, then there is absolutely nothing wrong with walking away without so much as a backward glance. She's not adding anything positive to your life and there's nothing you can do for her.
2006-10-05 06:17:00 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
she truely needs help and you don't need that negativity in your life but you don't have to be her friend to be a friend. help her from afar. and the only reason why she gets mad when you tell her something is because she does not have a happy life, just pray for her and hope for the best.
2006-10-05 06:30:52 · answer #8 · answered by juicciefruit 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've made the right choice and if I were in ur shoes I probably would have done the same thing.
2006-10-05 06:58:16 · answer #9 · answered by Tushi K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she's a mess and I'd get as far away from her as possible. You don't need her problems and she is not your friend if she can't be happy for you.
2006-10-05 06:27:46 · answer #10 · answered by bardstale 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋