The bad thing is, i have never been able to catch her in the act. How do you catch someone that is slick? She covers her trail really well, and is always one step ahead of me. Without the evidence, I have no case. Every red flag in the world is there, and I have been told she was with someone else. A private investigator is out of the question, since I couldn't hide that much money without her knowing. Surely somone has some ideas I could use, don't they?
2006-10-05 05:45:34 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Put a keylogger on your computer. You'll capture every keystroke ever made. If nothing comes up then let it go. If something does, print it out and drop it in her lap. What's she going to do, accuse you snooping?
2006-10-05 05:49:32 · answer #1 · answered by Jim C 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sorry your going through this... I've seen many friends who have gone through this as well. So from someone who is not emotionally attached with your problem.
This has been the best route so far:
1.) If your looking for some evidence for your divorce... Hire a detective it will pay out in the long run... Your screwed if you tell a judge well your honor she was cheating on me without proof.
2.) Find a good divorce lawyer... Who says your going to get one... But a lot of times they have contacts in the field and again it will save you money in the long run. It will all happen so fast and the lawyer can delay the payment of the fees for both their help and the private investigator. This masks the cost till she finds out...Often times by then its to late. If you decide to get a divorce you can tack it on the marriage so the bill is split! If not.. Its a worthwhile cost to jump start counseling.
3.) After you have taken steps to protect yourself... Approach her and ask.. Even if you know the truth ... Give her a chance to be honest with you. If she is there is a chance your marriage can still work..If that's what you want.. If not... Your on the ball.
4.) Serve her with the papers. Most divorces have a waiting period. And if you both want to work it out its a serious wake up call.. If not? Well hey .. Why let your life go by?
Hope that helps,
RM.
2006-10-05 06:11:53 · answer #2 · answered by mint_ice_cream 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Radio shack sells inexpensive telephone tapping devices. You would have to hide it all in the attic or someplace like that. With a small VOX recorder, telephone conversations will be recorded. If she has a cell phone, check incoming cell numbers, see one that is not familiar, go to a pay phone and call it. Home or business phone would show up on caller ID. For about 70 dollars you can buy a camera that is motion sensitive, and will photograph everyone coming in or out of your house. Place a small VOX recorder(hidden) in her car. All conversations will be recorded.
2006-10-05 05:58:18 · answer #3 · answered by loufedalis 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Confront her about it. A friend of mine just went through this. Just ask, she may deny it, but if the signs continue keep asking her every few days. Explain to her that things seem different, tell her what you have been noticing and ask her straight out what is up with her. She will eventually feel so guilty she will tell. If you don't want to do that, just leave. If you are so sure she is cheating, just get out. Once a cheater always a cheater---it has been proven over and over again.
2006-10-05 05:49:28 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well why don't you pretend that you have to travel for business and than you'll have all the time you need to find out if she's cheating or not coz if she really is cheating she'll get him over or at least she'll try to spend the nite at his place. but if you usually don't do business trips than find a good excuse to be away for one nite coz if you're saying that she's clever and always a step ahead of you she'll know the trick and she'll avoid it.so be courageous and give what she's asking for (a nite without you) and good luck..
2006-10-05 05:59:22 · answer #5 · answered by celine 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well you could spy on her at work. Take a day off and park somewhere near her office. Watch who she goes to lunch with.
Check her credit card bills. Ask a friend of yours that she doesn't know to spy on her a little in a store, restaurant, etc. they have camera phones now, you know. Ask your male friend to hit on her to see what she does. Check her cell phone call lists to see what calls she's made or come in to her (if she hasn't erased them). show up at her job unexpectedly and see how she reacts. if she's nervous and wants to hustle you out of there, there's a good chance the person she's cheating with works in that office.
There are a million ways to find out where someone goes and what they do.
2006-10-05 05:52:46 · answer #6 · answered by bodinibold 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Um, hello, people? The "kill her" stuff is a little much, particularly given the fact some people might actually go out and take that advice.
Anyway, do something completely out of your routine. For example, if you suspect she is going out at a certain time, say leaving for his house after work on Wednesday night, then show up at her work at quitting time and take her for dinner. Then watch as she squirms to get to a phone to call him and let him know she can't make it.
2006-10-05 05:52:07 · answer #7 · answered by VNCGirl 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Is there a prenumptual agreement or something is the reason you are trying to "catch" her in the act so you can scream adultery? Otherwise why not just get it done and file? Or are you like me and you just want to be able to go, "AH HA! I caught you! You lying little JERK!" Because if you can't hire a P.I. then you have to follow her yourself.
2006-10-05 05:52:27 · answer #8 · answered by Lorie S 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Have you tried a video approach. You can go to any rent-a-center place and rent one for a week, hide it somewhere you "think" she might be and then good luck. If you can't do that, then hire a friend to the searching for you. I think your best bet if you have asked her and she said, "no, I am not cheating", is to either A) Take her at her word or B) Video her or C) Hire a friend to "spy" on her. Good Luck.
2006-10-05 05:50:40 · answer #9 · answered by cdb774 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
take it from a woman and i hate to confess this but we are good at cheating and that is only because we learn from you men and i am not saying that you are one but look if you cant catch her and you really believe that she is cheating you may have to be slick and hire a detective and say the money went some where else. but you have to ask yourself one question... do you really want to know the truth cause assuming is one thing but to actually know is another. good luck
2006-10-05 05:51:01 · answer #10 · answered by juicciefruit 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋