Is anybody else here who doesn't have any gender identity at all?

Question

I do have a biological gender, but I can neither identify with my own gender nor the opposite gender. I feel like I'm somewhere in the middle, kind of genderless or something, and I don't seem to fit into any group, I'm always the freak who is nothing like the rest. I have never met anyone who understands this. Does somebody else here feel like this, like you don't have any gender identity at all?

Isis, the thing is, I don't really embrace both aspects that much. I dislike so many things that are considered typical aspects of either gender. I do have a couple of things in common with each gender, but because I'm different in so many ways I never really fit in and most of the time I'm like an alien among them. When I'm with a group of either gender I feel like I'm in the wrong place because I'm nothing like them.

People get confused about me all the time and they seem uncomfortable about not being able to fit me into any box, so I'm always a bit of an outsider and never fit well enough into any group to be accepted completely as one of them. I'm always the freak on the sidelines.

I'm tired of having to act fake in order to not be treated like a freak from Mars, I wish people could just accept me as I am and stop with the damn stereotypes as well. And it would be great to hear from someone else who has a similar problem because as I said, I feel like nobody understands.

Lesleann, I'm in my late twenties and I've never been too concerned about what people think about me or gone out of my way to please them or prove anything to them. I've been myself. But I have been alienated and treated like a freak for being who I am. I'm tired of that, tired of people's reactions when they find out the unexpected about my character, tired of having some people constantly trying to "fix" me and change me to make me fit better into my gender or telling me I should be like this or that because of my gender. I'm tired of people assuming things about me because of my gender when there is almost nothing I have in common with the "typicals" of my gender and tired of being grouped with a group of people I have little in common with. Just tired of the whole thing and I wish I had someone who I could talk to who would understand it. It would be a nice change to not be treated like a Martian for once, plus I guess it would be nice to know I'm not the only one who is like this.

Answer 1

Hi. You know, I wonder if it a case of you not having any gender, or, is it that you actually have two genders in you. Research clearly shows that our sexual identification is a broad spectrum, like a color band. People fit on it at different places. You are a person who is on the borderline between some of these colors. You feel both, sliding a little one way or the other. Therefore, you feel that you never quite "belong". But you do. You are a very sophisticated personality because you are able to embrace both of what we refer to as "masculine" and "feminine" aspects. I would rejoice in that. You are not "genderless", but more like a person who is ambidextrous. Go find a good counselor you can trust and explore this reality. You may like what you discover. :)

Answer 2

The reason no one understands is because, well, you sound way-out-there. I mean, I was was born a girl. Do I get up every morning and say, "Okay what girly things can I do today to prove to the world I'm a girl" I've always been somewhat of a loner-I don't have a huge circle of friends and I'm happy that way. I don't worry about fitting in or what "box" im being catagorized into, I'm just me, take it or leave it. Stop trying to please others. Do your own thing. Whether you like it or not, we are judged, everyday, but by who? Why do I care that "Sally" doesn't have enough going on in her own life that she has to nit-pic my choice of blouse that day. I don't think people look at you like a freak. You may FEEL like one and your hypersensistive. Didn't we all feel that way at one point in our lives?

Answer 3

no ... sorry I cant help ......