For women only: Does your mate understand your need for fantasy, or are you looking elsewhere?

Question

If not, why not tell him, in very explicit language ? You might be surprised at the results.

Dee:
Yes, since you ask, I will provide an example.

Ah, spring is our favorite time of the year. The snow has melted, the wildflowers cover the hills with brilliant splashes of color, and the scent is intoxicating. But your hand in mine is what makes my heart soar. I have dreamed about you all my life, and now, finally you are mine. Let me hold you tight, kiss your beautiful lips, and tell you the secrets of my heart. You feel it too, don't you? I am so happy that I found you, my one true love.

Amy M:
Thank you for your kind comments, and thank you for visiting my blog. I was one of the walking zombies myself, until a special woman touched my heart. Perhaps you may be the one to make this change in someone's life.

Never underestimate the power of love!

trushka:
yes, I know what you mean.

Debbie B:
It sounds as though you are a very lucky woman, living your real-life fantasy.

fancy face:
I commend your loyalty, the neccesary basis of a great love. Start slow, with a small little idea, and see if he will play along. It's a cinch by the inch, and hard by the yard.

Jewells:
Your home is a place of passion, and your love is full and rich. An absolute prerequisite for true happiness!

Dee:
Thank you for the kind words, but a powerful relationship must encompass the theater of the mind. My mate enjoys my physique, but it is my mind that consistently wins her heart. How did you like my small effort on your behalf?

paprklp:
My sincere hope is that other women have learned much from your answer. I suspect you husband's libido has a great deal to do with his passionate wife.

Double D:
I agree. Keep you initial fantasies very light, like the one I illustrated. We men are thick, but trainable.

Shelby 551:
Wow! I can feel the passion from here!

Gïrl ñÈ׆ Ðöör©:
You and your mate have discovered a great secret. I'm glad you shared this with us today.

brazenone:
I sincerely hope you achieve your heart's desire, to enjoy fulfillment with your mate. It is time to reveal the consequences of his lack of attention to your needs, and allow him to decide if he wants to be your forever man.

Faith:
Level with your mate, who sounds like an engineer. (these men invent and make our modern lives possible, so I respect their contribution) He needs to know that his rigid behavior can and will have ruinous results on your relationship. You will either wither inside, or look elsewhere. I suggest you show him this page, and let him absorb the realities of a woman's precious needs.

Answer 1

This picture is better than the Carey Grant one.
I have the opposite problem.My mate has too much libido and is game to try anything. I would have thought he would be tired of it by now; we have been married a really long time. However, most people can't believe we are married due to the obvious affection we have for one another. I once fulfilled one of his fantasies not long ago. Since I was a hula dancer in my early 20's it wasn't a big leap for me to perform when I saw he was interested in the VIP men's world. I was quickly hired as a dancer in a very posh club. He soon lost his interest in the club scene and installed a pole in our room where I ended up performing for him and him alone. I never made it to my first day of work. LOL You are right telling your mate explicitly as well as showing can have remarkable effects.

Answer 2

A well-oiled machine, a black and white graph, the facts and reality--my husband understands these concepts. Fantasy, imagination, and romance are all foreign and frightening to his mind. He sees no logic to them and no point in exploring them. He expects our relationship to work like the insides of a clock--each part doing its job at the precise time in a never deviating manner. How do you explain something as wonderful as fantasy to a man with a mind like that?
I'm committed to my marriage and am not looking elsewhere, but I long to hear him say, "I love you, my beautiful wife. Let's try something new...." Why can't he learn to play? How can we have fun together? My frustration and hurt builds each time I hear him say, "No! That's just too weird. I don't want to pretend and you shouldn't either. I want you right here, right now, not in some make-believe world where you can change what is real. This should be enough for you." I respect my husband and don't want to make him uncomfortable, but I still wish for things that will never be.
I love your example of a fantasy. I find it absolutely breathtaking.

Answer 3

One of the sexiest things couples can do is talking about their fantasies. One fantasy at a time. Make it your fantasy tonight and your lovers another night. Tell your lover something that really turns you on. Make it seem like an erotic adventure or story. Tell the details; try to express why it is so hot to you. You can even just tell a story you read that you really liked.

This kind of fantasy sharing can be a great way to get to know each other. This should be a mainstay of all new couples but even if you are together years, keep checking in with each other with the sharing of fantasies. Fantasies can change over time. Do you know what your lover fantasizes about?

Answer 4

I don't need to tell him my fantasies. He is a fantastic guy and gives me whatever I like. To be honest, life with my man is so good, both inside and outside the bedroom that there is no room for fantasies. I get my pleasure, if you know what I mean.

Answer 5

oh crimneys...why did you have to ask this question?! Yes he understands, yes I have told him, And in very explicit language...but I am still looking elsewhere....but not in real time sense, I have found a man who can live these fantasies out with me, someone as kinky and twisted and horny as I. I would love to have this in real time with the boyfriend...but it is 'just not him' (although he does it give it his all, I can give him that :)

Answer 6

Hey Doc I think you are hot, if that your picture. Well so far most of fantasies have been fulfilled but still trying to figure out new ones. Wanna give me any?

Answer 7

Hey Dr. You need to explain more! Come on how about some details??????

Ok that sounds really good!!!! But you are one of a kind! Men don't think like you and if they do where are they???? Is that your pic? Be honest! Give us more?? You should write a book?

Answer 8

no he does not understand my needs at all, spoke to him about it , but nothing was done about it, so therefor i find a way to climax, and no i am not looking elsewhere dont have to dont want to cause i love him with all my heart and soul, we have been together for 8 years

Answer 9

I don't have a need for fantasy- are you surprised?? I go for the real thing- D

Answer 10

Yes he does understand. We talk about it often and even talk about our fantasies while having sex. It really spices things up and we both enjoy it.