In middle school, i befriended some people that eventually turned on me. When they betrayed me the first time, they faked an apology and i made friends with tthem again. They did this at least 3 times. I got in a whole heap of troule and got a bad reputation for this. Is it my fault or is it them?
2006-10-04 18:54:15 · 6 answers · asked by karpflover 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me. Does this apply my situation.
2006-10-04 18:55:22 · update #1
I realized it after the fact but i was so desperate to keep friends.
2006-10-04 19:02:33 · update #2
I also didn't think the apology was fake at that time
2006-10-04 19:03:55 · update #3
Oh your post brought back bitter memories and unanswered questions that (I am sad to admit) still bug me.
What was wrong with me that they turned on me? Did I do something to deserve their negative attention? Was I simply a bad judge of character and genuineness in peopel at that age? Where are they today so that I can show them I've reached a stage in my life, sans their friendship, where I am happy, content and they are (one of them still is) single, into their party lifestyle and in the same old rut. I too, ended up with a lot of bad press from a wider social circle that we used to hang out with at the time. There were terrible things said by one particular girl, and most of the time, I had no idea. I still treated those people as friends because I just had no clue of the smear campaign behind my back. It was only after university that another close friend (who never gave up our friendship like some others did) opened up about what was going on around me at the time.
I am not sure whose fault it is in your case. Probably a bit of both. Middle school is a notorious age for young adults to test themselves (and their best buds!) in real, sometimes raw situations that leave some emotionally massacared. They, for picking on one of their own not once but three times, and you for not having some self-confidence to end a bad situation. However your case is more understandable than theirs.
This tug-and-pull of values, morals and how far they go to 'punish' an unpopular member of their clique is supposed to be character building for both.
Today I realise, even though I sometimes still ponder over my own role in picking such terrible people as friends, that its more important to forgive and move on. While we are still pondering and reflecting and (sometimes) hating on them, they have careers, relationships and perhaps, another poor soul they are tormenting in their workplace. While we are still stuck in the past. It need not be this way. Life goes on.
Whats more important is, did their bad behaviour bring out the best in you? If it did, then their purpose in your young life was served, and now its time you turned your back on THEM. For good.
2006-10-04 19:11:17 · answer #1 · answered by RealChic 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
To forgive is divine. Have you been forgiven more than once? I have. You can forgive but you might not forget. Learn from your mistakes. Forgive them and try to show them where they are doing wrong. Forgiving them doesn't mean you have to get stepped on.
2006-10-05 02:01:48 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
your fault by far, you were befriended and knew it was a fake apology, you made a dumb move and therefore deserved what you got
2006-10-05 02:00:36 · answer #3 · answered by Steveo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOU SHOULD learn now, to leave the trouble makers alone.
2006-10-05 01:58:26 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i'd say it's their FAULT, but that you should be more wary of the "friends" you make. good luck!
2006-10-05 01:58:45 · answer #5 · answered by altgrave 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes, it does apply to you
2006-10-05 01:58:23 · answer #6 · answered by figgy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋