Help........?

Question

I had always been curious.. i feel weird when im around a very pretty girl i dont kno very well.. i get scared when i look at a girl because i think every1 else will think im staring at her, yet i still look at her body mostly... i been also having weird dreams with girls for months.. i never done anything with a girl at all.. but yet im curious and scared if i try i might like it.. plus i was raised as it being a bad thing..but i dont want to live my whole life unsure about this.. What should i do?

Im young.. no kids and not married

Answer 1

Hi. It's very normal to feel weird around people you don't know well, and sometimes when they're beautiful more so. That you feel this way could mean a lot of things. Like Jayelle said, you could be comparing yourself or wondering what it would be like to be her or to be her friend. You are aware of yourself enough to know that you are feeling something, and recognizing your feelings is very good. They are telling you something, and the most important thing about them is to always be honest with yourself about them. Sometimes the challenge is to figure out why you're having them, but no feeling is ever wrong.

If you are in your teens, the truth is that your body is doing a lot of changing and your mind is growing a new perspective on everything. What you're experiencing could be regular confusion because it's a very confusing time in life. Or it could mean that you might be curious, bi, or gay. The thing is you'll only know this answer after befriending a lot of people over time. Then you can begin to really figure out who makes your heart and body sing. Until then, it's gonna remain a bit of a mystery and there's no point trying to force an answer because the one you get that way might not be a real one. So, my advise is to wait until you meet a woman who you know is right for you and you are right for her and to go where your heart leads. If you never meet such a person, then maybe what you're experiencing now is just growing pains and curiosity.

Btw, I'm gay and know that being a lesbian is neither wrong nor something to fear. If you are, it's so much healthier to accept yourself and live fully than to unnecessarily live in shame or fear. I hope this helps.

Answer 2

Find a gay/bisexual woman who attracts you. Just let things happen. If you get scared, try again sometime. If you feel like "this is too gross", then you are NOT gay.
Everyone has fantasies. Most of them are just fantasies, not anything which needs to be explored. If I was you, I would see what's up about this. It will not hurt anyone. I take it that you are young. By the time you're say, 25, most people will not care one way or the other if you're gay. Quality friends don't judge on someone's sexuality.

Answer 3

Quit panicing about gender and social roles.... look at the PEOPLE not thier sexuality or gender.... Fall in love with someone who's lovable, and have sex with them when it feels right.

Lust might raise it's head, and believe it or not... Lust is good and essential to the human being. If you lust after someone, Carefully let them know... test the water and if the spark is there, light thier fire. Psrsonaly I'm not gay, and dont count myself as bi.... But I have been in bed with (GASP!!) another man on more than one occasion... It was lust, and I have never regretted it.

Be carefull, explore your feelings and as you grow older, you will find your level.

If I can give one bit of advise..... no matter who you do choose to sleep with, be happy, be sure, and be SAFE. If you cant do all three.... WALK AWAY !

Answer 4

Hey Ashley,

I commend you on your question and as far as I see it, If you have kids or are married you really do need to get this of your mind, otherwise its your life, your body and if its what you want to do then its what you want to do and hence should just give it a shot, and if you happen to like it then its no problem, it takes up all sorts of people to make this world and lesbians are just some of them, dont be scared!, I'm sure your beautiful so you'll have no problem in attracting a girl if thats what you want to do.

I make note of this qoute.
"each person has there own life and its upto us as induviduals to make our own life choices and not hold back"

I hope that I have been able to assist you in some way with your life.

thanks.

Mitch
Launceston, Tas
Australia

Answer 5

If you're very young, like teens, it could very well be that you're comparing yourself to others, figuring out how you're measuring up and what kind of girl you'd like to be.

Or it could be that you're bi or gay. And that's just fine, too.

Nobody's going to say you have to go tattoo a rainbow ribbon to your forehead and that's it! At the same time, understand you're not the only one who feels that way, and you can have a very good life if you go on feeling that way.

Answer 6

honey, i ve had that same feeling 4 40 yrs. now. like u, i never acted on them, but would jokeingly[?] say i was gay. deep down, i thought it might b true. it s 2 late 4 me to see if what i was feeling was real, but mayb not 4 u.go where ur mind & heart tells u. its not as taboo as it was when i was young.and its not a 'bad thing' anymore 2 b who u r.

Answer 7

if you want to wait, wait!

If you're ready to find out what your feelings mean, no matter what the outcome, expiriment, ask your friends, find a group you can talk to but most of all, dont let it scare you

Answer 8

Pray if u believe in God; and if not.....play the tape all the way out. Let's say u do sleep with another female; and decide u don't like it. Can u imagine the feelings of shame and guilt that you may have. On the other hand if u do like it............then you'll have to deal with that bridge when u get ready to cross it. Sometimes people simply go through phases.....maybe that's what you're going through....................

Answer 9

Ashley,
Did you see the Matrix? I love this quote, and it's for you now.

"You have already made the choice, you just have to understand it."

Your mind has been there already. Now unless you are not single, It tends to be the thing to do bewcause you already decided to do it. You are fantasizing. If you are married, ESPECIALLY if you have kids, tell yourself NO! Get your mind off of it.

Answer 10

I will not address this question till you turn 18. Give me a call when you turn 18.