my girl is cold and cruel, she says she has a attatchment disorder, what does this mean, shes so unloving?

Answer 1

You say she's cold and cruel. She says she has an attachment disorder then you ask what it means and if that's why she's unloving.

Try googling attachment disorder.

It is an actual disorder.

Attachment disorder usually comes about due to major trauma suffered as a child.

Talk to her about what it is that has led to her having attachment disorder.

Many who have attachment disorder will avoid intimacy on all levels - physical, psychological, emotional and even financial. They withdraw due to learnt mistrust and fear of betrayal and hurt.

Some hurt before they can be hurt - they get in first and then put up a shield.

Has your girl been to a professional whose diagnosed her or is it something she feels she may have?

I can understand how you feel like you're being hurt and that you may have done nothing to deserve how you've been treated. I can also understand that you feel pressured by her either to leave or to stay and prove yourself. You may also be wondering if it's worth sticking around for.

I can't answer that for you - no-one should - it's up to you because either way, if you stay or not, you need to be okay with your decision because you will be affected by it.

I feel for both of you in this situation

Answer 2

First of all, if she has been diagnosed with an attachment disorder, she should be getting counselling. She will have trouble with making friends, keeping relationships and having empathy for others. She will seem cold or cruel because she has difficulty putting herself in the place of others and thus hurts others. She will also rarely be demonstrative with her affections or emotions. If you love her, get her into therapy if she is not already in therapy. However, if she is just saying she has the disorder and has not been diagnosed, perhaps she is telling you that she just doesn't feel the same way about you as you do about her. If you plan on staying with her, therapy and your acceptance and understanding of her condition will help, but it will be a difficult road for you if you are someone who needs to know that she loves you and who needs to see proof.

Answer 3

This means she is probably (I am not a doc)confused and suffers under maybe an inferiority complex. I would suggest that you take her to a Psychotherapist and talk about it. There are so many disorders, which can be caused through very many things, such as parent-split up when young or an accident or whatever.
She was obviously disappointed at sometime with someone, which holds her back to get attached to anyone. Try talking about it to her, you may be surprised how she opens up because she is evidently not happy the way her life is now!

Wish you both good luck, cheers

Answer 4

Someone failed to teach her how to show emotion. It has to be learned at an early age. Maybe you need to find another girl friend. Attachment disorder sounds like an excuse to me, unless she means fear of commitment.

Answer 5

Her disorder does not excuse her from hurting you. IF anything, that sounds like a guise to keep you ensnared to her.

Get rid of her, relax for a bit, and find someone who is regular.

If she is worthy, she will change her "disorder." If she cannot or will not, then she will not make the effort to be "your girl."

Answer 6

I think its her way of telling you she no longer loves you, you have to choose if you can stay in a relationship with her or get out and find someone who will love you, hope everything works out for you.

Answer 7

She can't attach herself to people or really care about them. Be her friend but don't accept anymore from her, she is unable. She needs alot of therapy, patience, compassionate and understanding.

Answer 8

It means she has difficulty forming close relationships, it's a form of mental illness.

Answer 9

Maybe she's mixing around the wrong ppl..try changing her social circle

Answer 10

Don't except lame excuses for bad behavior.