I am with this guy for the past 7 years. And the life ws great until 3 yrs ago. All of suddenly he changed a lot. He is not at all passionate abt sex, life, going out etc. and we get to meet only once a week. however, while he is away for business purpose i argue with him all the time abt he not being responsible to his little one and he purposely took up this job and being so lovely to his female coleagues etc. However, when we do meet over the weekend he just sit in one place and watch a t.v and do a few of his office work. He wont liek to go out with us for dinner or for outing. When he is there i argue with him all the time and i get angry when i see him because he never call or respond to my phone while he is away. What to do? I love him very much but please give me advice how not to hurt him and my little one by telling anything bad or not hurting them in any way.
2006-10-04 17:14:52 · 22 answers · asked by kiran123 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Duh!!!! it doesn't matter if you hurt him....he is hurting you by being a jerk!!! You need to x-n-a-y that guy right now before you waste more time with him.
2006-10-04 17:18:20 · answer #1 · answered by Easter Bunny 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Are you married to each other or is it just a relationship with marriage? The fact that it lasted for 7 years should show that it had worked for so long and both of you do not want to break it. After 7 years, generally relationships sour. It requires some scruples on the part of the individual to remain faithful to the partner. You need to discuss and devise ways of making it as interesting and fresh as ever before. Both of you need to go out frequently on tour or sightseeing. If there is something already serious in your relationship, you are the best judge to find out and the reasons therefor. It is irretrievable , well,. think over whether you should honourably end it or drag it on.
2006-10-05 00:27:32 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I would suggest to give him a break he may just be trying to provide for his family and in doing so he is very tired when he is home. Although you do need to be honest with him and let him know the way you feel. Be aware that this will probably cause a fight and or argument although the 2 key things to remember is that 1 never close your eyes on a fight and 2 never walk on a fight. While being gentle understand there one way or the other there will be hurt feelings ether way.
2006-10-05 00:29:55 · answer #3 · answered by rustin_morley 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In simple words become less possesive. He is your life partner and needs you and you need him. As far as talking to the female coleagues it his part of work and it is a cyclogical tactic to get better work. Common now. Sit back and relax. He will be back with you when you slowly reduce much concentration of what he is doing. Jus say a good morning when he gets up and good night when he sleeps. Send a sms if he is not around you. This will help a lot
2006-10-05 00:28:45 · answer #4 · answered by lkslalit 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok.. here you go...
1. Never say... any think starting .. ' You dont , You didnt , or you use to be like that' . This will put more negative feelings in his brain and... he will start thinking.. is he really not..
2. Instead... Give him... some Room... Dig into his Emoitions.. Find out.. what exactly has happened... Why is he like that.(not wat he use to be). Is he facing any problem? Or he has completely lost his interest.. ?
3. If so.... Start making a change in you... Change your Hairstyle.. Change your looks.... Change Dressing code... Make him feel that you are looking different.. and find out if he discovers the Change in you...
4. If it about Sex... Try looking more sexier.. when you in Private... Talk sexy.. n Naughty.. Say you dream about anything.. Naughty. ..
But.. before reaching 4. Work on 1,2,3. It will help you... :)
2006-10-05 05:02:29 · answer #5 · answered by deepak_k_rana 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You deserve answers. He is clearly either taking his limited time with you for granted or not interesting in the life/lifestyle you are living as a couple/familiy. Ask him directly how is feeling about your relationship and what he would like from it. You should realize that the problems may lie with him or you or both or neither. If he is not contributing to your life and his child, you need to tell him to shape up. Don't worry about hurting him. He is hurting you and your priority is to make sure your child is emotionally and physically well.
2006-10-05 00:20:16 · answer #6 · answered by sweet 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don;t say compromise but would put it this way. Try to talk to him and dont give up. Arguing / chasing will just lead to more differences. Invest time in your own world and keep yourself fit and firm (I mean cheer and normal) Never leave him. The feeling that you care is much more for him to feel him concerned. I hv not replied to gain points here. I feel this is more practical after all ur love is what ur words describe.
2006-10-05 05:42:39 · answer #7 · answered by Believeinu 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have u changed in appearance since last 7 years. No harm intended, but it seems that he is losing interest in u. Do not provoke him , do not fight with him and do not pester him about his habits. Try to change your appearance and style, maybe different haircut kinda tthing.Try something new in bed.
Alternatively u can try to find out if he is having an affair with someone else.If all this does not work out then confront him for this behaviour. BUT WHILE DOING SO, DO NOT FIGHT WITH HIM.
2006-10-06 14:19:14 · answer #8 · answered by sk 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Two possible causes
1) He got bored with the life as a whole
2) He got in to serious problem in his recent career change
No point in fighting with him. Findout why he has changed like this during past three years.
If you don't have patience in all these, just leave him alone for some time.
2006-10-05 02:20:00 · answer #9 · answered by Govinda 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am guessing he is not your husband it sounds like this guy has got some work related problems he needs to figure out SOMETHING YOU WROTE here concerns me you don't want to hurt him but he sure doesn't seem to have a problem hurting you and your children by his actions he comes home and veg's out and shows little interest in you or life with you try to get some councling but I would try to figure out if this is a relationship you should stay in i encourage you to think about yourself and child then figure if this is some body you want to be with
2006-10-05 00:25:06 · answer #10 · answered by soldierof the 82ndAirborne 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you LIKE to be treated badly? Do you think your' little one wants to see you treated badly and fighting all of the time?
There are men out there who you would be happy with.
It's better for you two to separate and be happy than to stay together and be miserable.
I'd stop getting together with him at all. I'd also stop answering his calls. Maybe that will get his attention. Otherwise...move on.
2006-10-05 00:22:20 · answer #11 · answered by Rebecca C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋