What is the secret to a successful marriage?

Answer 1

There are 2 common attitudes that people go into a marriage with.

1) Common with younger people (who often end up divorced, sadly...): We have this idea, this dream of what our life together will be. We will create this dream life together. We will make it happen and we will have the life we envisioned together.

What happens: Life. The couple can't compromise at all, can't appreciate the beauty of every precious detail of the miracle of everyday life. Like finding a hand written grocery list written by your spouse. Or giving them flowers for no reason. They can't afford the house they wanted. They have a special needs child. They are more focused on what they are not getting out of the relationship than what they have.

what happens next: Divorce.

2) Common among people who marry later or on second marriages:

We are going to do whatever we need to do to get through today. We have dreams and goals and life would be empty without them. But right now we need to change the baby's diaper, mow the lawn, and then make a little quiet time for ourselves, then it's time to get some sleep so we can get up for work in the morning. Before they know it, these people have been getting through days one at a time for 20 years, 40 years, 50 years together. If they are not getting what they want out of the marriage, they work on it and understand that they will not get everything they want out of life, but can clearly see if they have a good life or not and be happy with it.

Remember, when a man marrys a woman, he is marrying the person, and the body that person is in. When a woman marrys a man, she is marrying the person, and the life she thinks she will have with him. (that is the reason why almost all women need a man to be predictable to marry him. They may date or have an affair with a wild, romantic stallion of a man, but they will marry one who goes to work every morning and comes home every nite. Even if there is something very wroing with that man, if she knows about it, can resign herself to dealing with it, then she can say, this will be my life with him. Do I want it...?)
Now let's say that the womans body changes over time and isn't what the man married after a while. Should the man divorce her for that? Of course not. Let's say the life a woman has with her husband isn't what she thought it would be after a while. Should she divorce him? Assuming that he's not a cheating, violent alcoholic, no. If you have unrealistic demands like this, then you are not marrying a person. You are marrying your own dreams and you will not be happy no matter what you do in life. You will blame your marriage, divorce, and still be unhappy later in life.

Answer 2

Making It Through Arguments. Arguments will happen. That being said the first step to making it through the arguments is to know that things said in anger aren't always true. We often say things we don't really mean when we are angry and while those things can hurt, if we remember that they are said in anger it can be a little easier to get past them. The second thing is to apologize as soon as possible, even if you weren't wrong. This is important for moving on and making up. Third is to talk as soon as possible after the anger is gone. It is also a good idea to never go to bed mad. Work it out and it is a lot easier not to hold onto whatever you were fighting about.They realized making it in the frontier was not for weak willed people. They understood the challenges of surviving and that they increased when there were two pulling in the same direction. They needed each other. Out of that mutual need came dependence, commitment and when that was witnessed, respect. Out of the respect and trust and selflessness and commitment over time, love was developed. No body, no body, no body must come between a man and a woman. You have heard it said that a man will leave his mother and father and become one with his wife? That is to be the final word on that subject. No exceptions. Straight from the owners manual. Lastly and most importantly, there is a hierarchy that must be followed by all party's equally in matters of authority it is God, the man, the woman and finally the children. From oldest to youngest. It doesn't matter if that's not a popular view today or not. It is more important to please God than society. When your family is in need, who will you depend on? Other people or God. Put him in the front and center and live in his blessings.

Answer 3

I don't think anyone truly knows that answer......If you are asking, you must be married, because all of the young girls have a picture of what their successful marriage is. I would guess that there are no "secrets" to marriage....only ideas....like changing things up: even if your man will never cheat, he's still a man and he still gets bored....and spoiling him every once in a while: giving him lots of kisses and bringing him a cold beer during a football game.....or even cooking something he likes: even if you hate his mom, he'll appreciate your attempt at it.....see those are not secrets, just good manners! Either way, good luck and best wishes!

Answer 4

Honesty is the number #1 secret.A marriage is also alot of hard work.There will be times when one partner is not putting in thery"re share and only one person is contributing to the marriage.The other partner will have to carry the load and over look all the bad the other partner is bringing into the marriage.I know it stinks,but sometimes that is the only way to have a succesful marriage.Goodluck

Answer 5

Keep the romance in the marriage. Think and do what you continue to discover about what pleases your partner. Build up yourself towards selflessness in the relationship.
Only you can decide that you are content in any relationship. In a marriage, look at a model that you would like to emulate. Read about marriage from the Bible. It is the only resource that will not change or disappoint.
Respect your partner always. Remember, "you reap what you sow."

Answer 6

trust and communication is key to a successful marriage.

Answer 7

There is not secret. Every couple needs to find their own way of making their marriage successfull. It is a partnership that needs to be held up by both husband and wife. Its 50/50. I dont have a perfect marriage but my husnabd and i have never ever gotten anywhere near to calling it quits. We negotiate, talk it though and we compromise.

Answer 8

Open and honest communication. Talk about everything; hopes, fears, dreams, fantasies and, most of all, problems.

Also, take the time to touch each other. I'm not talking about sex. Just acknowledge each other every day. Hugs and kisses and even just sitting together watching TV and touching a leg or an arm.

Answer 9

A secret to a successful marriage is not going to bed with each other every night; it's getting up with each other every day.

Answer 10

Well I think you first must have a partner that is first and foremost your best friend. You must be able to tell this person ANYTHING. If you feel that there are certain things you can not tell your partner...then they are not the right one. Secondly....you are going to have disagreements...you can not live with anyone and not disagree at some time...but its how you handle them that makes a good marriage. Lastly....Never take your partner for granted....and even in the best of marriages it happens from time to time...but you must be able to see that's what you are doing and correct yourself.

Answer 11

Listening to your spouse and really communicaitng about the real issues at hand, not just arguing whatever minor trigger is causing friction at the time. There's always a deeper problem and it needs to be resolved.