Why does my girlfriend's mother dislike me so much?

Question

My girlfriend's mother was always telling her daughter she should go out with me. That went on for 1.5 years. Finally, when we started dating, her mother changed her view, and started to dislike me. I don't know why. All I've ever done is treat her daughter like a queen. She's even gone as far as to make her daughter get a job so she'd have less time with me. My girlfriend and I love each other very much. We've celebrated our 1 year anniversary. We plan on getting married right after college. Heck, we've even decided to have 5 kids. Now that's planned parenthood. We live on the same street, but I hardly get to see her. Maybe 5 times a week. We don't get any private time together anymore. It's not like we've had sex yet, so I don't know why her mother hates me so much. It's been a drastic change.

Answer 1

mother advice of three: it is not you that she doesn't like but the fear of loosing her daughter.
we mothers tend to be over protected of our daughters. We don't like anyone who shows an interest in our daughters. my oldest daughter dated and i did not like her boyfriend. She now has three children by the same boy I didn't like when they dated. Today they are happy and he is good to my daughter and my three grandsons.

Answer 2

Woah. Sounds like an interesting woman. This is just my standpoint:
1.) The mother was on her daughter to date you for awhile- maybe she said that becuase she didn't want her daughter to date some hoodlum *point there, she thinks you are decent*
2.) When yall started dating she got controlling again and started intervening... she probably thought you were a "safe" option *make any sense?*
3.) She made her get a job *how did she live before? with her mother?*
4.) You need to survive college, pay off loans, and live life with each other *oh yea, and have sex- some ppl are compatable others... well lets just say there are one night stands for that very reason* before you even think about having a child let alone five *though it is a nice idea to have*

Bottom line... it is YOUR life. It is also HER life. Yall are adults and in college, meaningyou are on your way to having your own career and making your own choices! Sometimes parents will hang on as long as they can, even fight *fight dirty in this case* to have an ounce of influance in their childs' life.
You can either accept that the mom will always be there, trying to manipulate your girlfriend or do something about it i.e. confront the mother, with your gf, share the plans yall have together and let her know she can either support you two or leave you alone.
Best of luck :)

Answer 3

Seriously that sucks. The mother is usually the one from the parents who gives the boyfriend a chance. The father never thinks anyone is good for their daughter. There are many things that may be wrong all of which need to be discussed with your potential step mother should you really decide to go all the way with your gf. There are many perhaps this or perhaps that that one can say but nothing clears the air better than going directly to the source and figuring out. Ultimately, the mother should understand what you are trying to do by talking with her and give her a better sense of things. Good luck!

Answer 4

It SOUNDS like it's not that she doesn't like you - it sounds more like she's afraid of how involved you two have become. I don't know how old you guys are - but parents frown upon serious relationships at a young age. I am 36 now, but I dated the same guy all through highschool - and my mother couldn't stand him! She kept saying "theres so many guys out there, how can you know your going to marry HIM...." All that did was make us closer - at the time. But, I wish I listened to her - because she was right. Him and I did get engaged after highschool. Then suddenly, he changed - he wanted to see what else was out there and cheated on me. It hurt so bad. So just play it slow - don't try too hard. She'll come around when she realizes you have good intentions. But don't close your options! Life is too short!!!

Answer 5

Maybe over the 1.5 years you have been together you are showing lack of responsibility and her Mom fears you will not be able to care for her daughter.
Do you keep up on things and not come off as an air-head?

Answer 6

Well as sad as it sounds...perhaps your girlfriend is spending too much time complaining to her mother about you and not being totally honest about the goings on in your relationship...It might not be that her mom doesn't like you, she might simply dislike the BS she has to hear about you all the time...

Answer 7

i think you should pay attention to her mother! when she is around treat her mother like you would her. Bring her mom a flower or just complament her ask her if there is anything you can do to help out when you go to take your girl out for a date or go over there for dinner or something. Its as simplle as that because it says that your thinking long term. It shows your interested in not only her but her family as well and they people who brought her up to be a great person GOOD LUCK

Answer 8

All the women that I've been with there moms have been the same way get use to it i think their all the same i just take it with a grain of salt don't let it get you down, hang in there.

Answer 9

Thats bad!! It doesn't matter at the end of the day what her mum says. she is obviously not influencing her so try to forget about it for now and focus on keeping your girlfriend on side.

All the best!!!

Answer 10

pass on. There are a number of different females accessible and specific extra heart breaks to return. basically think of roughly her mom as a mom in regulation. could you quite handle that for something of your existence?