I am 21 and i have two small children one is 3 one is 3 months. I have been with my current bf for 3 years ( he is not the father of my first child). We broke up a little over a year and a half ago when i met this amazing woman. Me and her were together 6 months, she loved me so much more then i could ever imagine. She loves my son and she loves me. I broke it off with her because of a bunch of non sense reasons. then i got back with my old bf because i knew i was comfortable with him. I love her and i love him. my bf and i got pregnant 2 months after we got back together. And i had my little girl. i love my bf but not in love with him. he bores me. we are always fighting and never agree. he is a great guy but idk how to feel about him. since then i have stayed friends with my ex gf and she left to go be in the army because she said there was nothing here for her(meaning me) and now she is being shipped to iraq. i am in love w/ her and dont know what to do.... Help please..
2006-10-04 11:27:46 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I do think i need a theripist, and i am a co dependent.... but i have never been alone.. it sucks. i dont want to hurt any one. i love them both. but i would never ever try to hurt my kids. i really just dont know what to do, i am a mental case, i just want to be happy with out hurting any one.. i dont know what to do
2006-10-04 11:36:21 · update #1
he is the father of my three month old... my three year old i had when i was 17 and we started dating when i was 6 months pregnant. but my 3 year old still sees his dad we have joint custody... one week on one off. but i know i am not the center of the universe i just want to be happy cause me being depressed is not good for them either.. alot of it is from just havin a baby i no but i cant take happy pills they make me black out
2006-10-04 12:08:12 · update #2
courtneyjean,
Okay. . . . . it's rather painfully obvious. I hope that you treat me as a friend who's just telling you like it is.
If I get it right, your current boyfriend is the father of your kids. It's time to grow up and give your kids your all. You are no longer the center of your universe. Your kids are. Be their mom. And a wife to your boyfriend, to be your husband.
It may NOT be a popular way to think, but it's the best thing for your children. They will want mommy, and daddy as they will look at you to find out how to behave.
I was from a broken home, and I'm willing to see if you weren't too.
You are a mother.
2006-10-04 11:40:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well hmmm, your in a mess girl! It is possible to love two people at the same time. It's happened to me too. It sounds like you love them both but love the girl more. You and her split up and now she is in Iraq. You should have said something sooner. Now it's up to you. I don't suggest staying with someone just for the kids-if yall arn't happy the kids will notice and you want them to be happy right? Even if you have to be single for a while-NEVER depend on men or anyone other than youeself!! I made that mistake too. I would write your ex and see what happens with all of you. But if you have feelings for her then it;s not fair to your boyf,let him know how you feel. If he loves you,he will understand. Don't let him be in love with someone he dosen"t even really know. Well it's all up to you babe-Good luck!
2006-10-04 19:38:46 · answer #2 · answered by sexygal8321 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if u ask me i think you need to follow ur heart but u also have to think of ur children and how ur bf will feel about that.. alot of couples argue believe me i know lol but if she is being shipped there is nothing you can do about that once in the army there is no going back but for the sake of ur kids i would try to work it out with ur boyfriend so the kids can have a father figure
2006-10-04 18:32:27 · answer #3 · answered by Dclp8204 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to learn how to be alone.... You are hurtful to both of them with your irresponsible actions and confusion.... How sad that you keep playing people because you don't want to be alone... I hope your boy friend finds someone who thinks he is exciting and I hope your girlfriend finds someone in the army that will Cherish her.... I hope you find a great therapist....
You dont sound very stable for your two children... bringing people in and out of there lives like that.. Thank good ness they are young.
2006-10-04 18:32:13 · answer #4 · answered by mylife 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Drama, drama. Unfortunately you are going to have to live with the decision you made to break it off with her. She cant get out of Iraq; sad but true. If you love her you need to support her. Write her & send her stuff. Maybe while she is gone you could do yourself a favor and stay out of any realtionships. Give yourself time to get clear about who you are and what you want in life. Dont settle for the guy. Fighting in front of your kids is very unhealthy for them!! Get rid of him, go to school & get your life together while she is gone.
2006-10-04 18:33:49 · answer #5 · answered by Anne A 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There's more to think than just yourself.
If it weren't for your children I would say go and tell her that you love her and ask her to stay with you.
Now that you're a mother you have to think what is best for your children first, then for you.
You might just be fine if stay alone with your children, no bf, no gf.
It's your decision.
2006-10-04 18:34:42 · answer #6 · answered by The Greek Guy 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋