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I had my life all together, nice cars, excellent job,.... living it up until I met her, two years later married her, then divorced her and lost everything through the courts. I have now recovered thanks to my survival instincts.............its sad that she is now on welfair. Whats your story ?

2006-10-04 08:59:09 · 17 answers · asked by Hammer 2 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

I appreciate everyones response, very good stories......so lets all pat ourselfs on the back...( Its called suvival and only the strong stay alive ).....and good luck to all of you.....peace

2006-10-04 09:19:13 · update #1

17 answers

What a shame. I think this is why women are having more trouble finding husbands these days. If they ever release male birth control pills, I bet the marriage rate will drop like a coaster.

2006-10-04 09:08:40 · answer #1 · answered by xoxo 4 · 1 0

My ex was very generous with me. He left me with two preschool-aged children (one with disabilities), $20,000 of debt mostly due to his cocaine habit, the house and car that I owned before I met him, $600 worth of phone sex bills he'd made during that last month of marital bliss, a dislocated shoulder from the discussion I had with him about the phone bill, oh... and a three month old fetus that I was gestating at the time. He was a very generous guy...

I was graceful about the whole thing. I returned his generosity by giving him a Family Order of Protection, a 9 month stay in jail by the time he was $12,000 behind in child support, a call to his new girlfriend to tell her that my pregnancy should be evidence enough that he had lied when he told her we weren't having sex any more, and divorce papers as fast as I could have them processed.

Because of my own survival instincts, I have now (almost 10 years later) remarried a very nice man, live in a nice house in the suburbs, I get to travel and do things he never had an interest in doing, I drive a nicer vehicle, my disabled child is doing well, the other two are very bright and happy and well-adjusted and no one's slapped me around for years.

2006-10-04 16:12:06 · answer #2 · answered by thegirlwholovedbrains 6 · 1 0

I have been married twice before.

The first man took all dignity I had of Myself. All, if any, self worth I had. He beat Me, and bruised Me. Raped Me over and over every night. He left Me mentally with nothing. He also took and sold keep sakes I had from when I was a little girl to gain him money. He took alot. I was pregnant at the time. Beginning of the relationship he informed me how he was going to be there for me and the baby, ( the baby wasnt his), then turned it around on Me, told Me that it was My fault that the baby wasnt his, and tried to make Me believe that because the baby wasnt his, it was against him.

I now have a son. I consider a miracle baby. He's going to be 13 in Nov. God does time fly.

I then met My second exhusband. We got married, and spent 4 yrs too long together. He destroyed ALL my belongings. Things from when I was a child clear up to the time of our marriage. He molested My daughter, and abused My son. He not only destroyed Me, but he destroyed My daughter, and My son. the very most precious things. My daughter spent a year in therapy after words, and still is afraid that that man will come get her. She still has night mares because of that man. My son, just transfers the emotions to anger. When talking about the situation, or him.

It's sad what some people do. How they act. Why they do things. I finally got away from My second exhusband. I am free from him.

I did see him the other day though. I shook from head to toe when I did. I did have enough self control not to start anything right then and there, and not give him the time of day. He didnt deserve My anger. Theres so much that he not only took from Me but from My kids as well.

Since My last ex, I have met a man that treats My children with the greatest respect. He loves Me, unconditionally, does not beat on Me, does not hurt My children, or Me. He loves Me. I am finally for the first time in My life happy with what I have finally gotton. I have come through. I survived.

2006-10-04 16:13:25 · answer #3 · answered by Enigma 2 · 1 0

Hi, I feel for you. My story...lost one child( haven't seen him in 3 1/2 years ), two houses, my car, my possessions, dignity and pride. Forced to go on welfare and into housing. However, things are much better now. Went back to school, acquired work, off welfare and housing. Starting all over from scratch although very difficult, can also be very refreshing. Hope this gives you a bit of hope.

Furthermore, although I do feel for you men, it is not always the man that looses out. My ex quit his $30/hourly rate job so that he didn't have to pay support. Although his support builds monthly, I have still yet to see it. And is he receiving any repercussions...NO

2006-10-04 16:10:02 · answer #4 · answered by Sue O 1 · 1 0

Different kind of woman you married i guess. I too am divorced and we split up evenly we just went through i want this you want that and we both agreed and what we didnt' we discussed it again and realized who would use it more and at the divorce signing I even had a choice for spouseal support but I was evil about it or vindictive it just didnt' work out. And i had my own job so we both went our seperate ways. Now maybe if he had cheated on me or something really bad im sure any woman could get mean. i don't know about your circumstances of the divorce or if you hit her or abusive to her. but if it wasn't nothing bad and she took all this some women do this if they know things aren't going to work out they say im going to take as much as i can from him and screw him. Its the womans peronsality just like some men are users and takers. You just married a bad apple.

2006-10-05 04:39:06 · answer #5 · answered by For ever in my Heart 7 · 0 0

i had houses and a life, we did okay, but he cheated and left with the woman, i could not keep up with the payments, plus he had a house right across the street that him and the woman lived in, i was so hurt i just had to move away,the house was sold cheap,he took the truck, although it was in my name also, he traded it for a new vehicle,without my signature,had to move in with a daughter in another state, things did turn out for me,i reconnected with a past love, we bought a home, much nicer than what i had with the ex, i am treated with dignity, and loved unconditionally. last week a bill collector called to ask if i knew the whereabouts of my ex, they said he had not paid his credit card bills in some time, so i have to think things are not so well with him.at first i thought it was the end of the world,being in my fifties, i never thought i would find love again,but all is well in the world now, and i have a new life and i am happy, and i will never look back at that life, and no i never miss my ex, he treated me like dirt.

2006-10-04 22:31:55 · answer #6 · answered by jude 7 · 0 0

I rather keep my sanity then to be miserable.. That's is what you did.. You made a smart move because the materialistic things can't keep you sane in a situation where it's insane to live with a person only out to tear you down..

I was also left with nothing and its sad that she is now on welfair.
To us surviviors -- men punished by a system that only cripples the "winner".. Men, are face look at themselves in the mirror after being torn down by the courts.. That will live with me forever and I'm glad God gave me the experience of a divorce at my young age..

2006-10-04 16:07:19 · answer #7 · answered by tough questions 1 · 1 0

i have been married twice and yes i lost everything, but it was my choice. the only things i kept were may personal belongings and vehicles. u did the right thing cuz in todays world if a man divorces a woman and has anything left it just piss's of the courts. and in the long run u will have the last laugh

2006-10-04 16:06:19 · answer #8 · answered by keithy 3 · 1 0

I got left in the dirt. My ex husband took my car, house and everything else he wanted from me, and I was left with nothing. I even lost my job. After a few months, I found myself again, and realized that what he did to me made me stronger, and I do not regret anything. He gave my car to his now girlfriend and they live in my old house, and yes it was hard, but I have my own life and my own lover to worry about! It gets better with time.

2006-10-04 16:03:36 · answer #9 · answered by Expecting a Girl June 5th!!! 2 · 1 0

He cheated he got the house and wrecked his vehicle so the insurance would pay it off. And they did. I got stuck w/ the other payment. However I got custody. He got visitation. That was worth more than the house or car. And now he lost the house and he drives a crappy car. I met some one better. It all works out or so they say.

2006-10-04 16:18:58 · answer #10 · answered by That's my final answer 5 · 1 0

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