...that I'm sensitive about her. she don't want to hear me at all! Do you have any way in mind to make her stay at home!? I think the only way i didn't experience is punishing her. please don't tell me that I'm wrong.because it's something about our culture. even physically punishments are routine here. I don't want other people laugh at me because i'm not able to control my wife and I don't want to be agressive,too. If I were in your countries ,I wouldn't ask her something like that. so plz show me a new practical way.
2006-10-04 08:58:50 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Does she give reasons on why she wants to go out without you?
If your culture is to be by your wife at all times and others will frown on you if you two are not together then she should of known this before the marriage took place it seems. I would feel that people would be frowning at her instead of you. I cannot really tell you advise on what to do since I do not have any knowledge of your culture. I do feel you should have a heart to heart talk with her. Don't try to start the conversation with demands or "this is the way it is supposed to be".
Try getting into the conversation in a nice way. Try seeking counceling if needed.
2006-10-04 09:07:02 · answer #1 · answered by Keith Perry 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your culture requires you to treat your wife that way you should be questioning your culture. That you would consider punishment for this proves there is something wrong with your teachings.
It is true that there is more divorce in western culture. If you ask me I still think our system works better. Marriage is not a form of master slave relationship where you beat the uppity wife. Being able to control your wife that way does not make you a better man only abusive. It is impossible for us to relate.
2006-10-04 09:11:17 · answer #2 · answered by Flagger 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thank you for your honesty. I will be honest back. I was in a relationship like the one you speak of my ex was from lebanon and he was fine when dating took me places . but once we got married he became very jelous of men looking at me and said to save fights we should stay in. I didn't like this idea. So he try to bring board games home but after awhile you can only play so many board games once he knew i didnt' want to listen to him staying in he became very mean and treated me badly. this is not the right way to handle this . he didnt' hit me dont' get me wrong. but his culture they can be very cruel. No sex withheld talking to me for 3 weeks as punishment and so on.
There is not way to cage a man or women up and make them a prisoner in there own home im sorry thats not what you probably wanted to hear. but its the truth.
Why do you feel you lose face and that you can't control your wife when all she wants to do is go to a movie its not like she's asking to go out alone without you. and believe me many women do that and even go out with women friends to bars.
You are to stuck on your beliefs and this will not work out well for your marriage. You will have to try and comprimise with her. if you don't she will leave you then you can stay in all the time you want with yourself.
Good luck.
2006-10-04 21:46:15 · answer #3 · answered by For ever in my Heart 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why do you want her to stay at home unless she is with you? are you afraid she will be hurt or harassed? why must your wife be controlled-are you not equals? I am not trying to be condecending just curious. Did her father have the same problem? was it an arranged marriage?
Your only options from my point of view are to either accept that she has a mind of her own or lock her in the house.
2006-10-04 09:06:27 · answer #4 · answered by rwl_is_taken 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm glad that you explained that you are from a Muslim country and not the U.S. so we can understand that the mindset is very different there.
The way to make your wife stay home is for her to be Happy to be at home.
I know that in your culture, the man is in charge, but if you want your wife to be happy there, be supportive of her, give her lots of romance (not just demands for sex) but true romance. Let her know how special she is to you and that you truly care about her and what she truly wants.
If you allow her to feel wanted, desired and important to you, not just your obedient wife, she will want to be at home with you.
Also, give her things that she will enjoy doing for activities. Does she have hobbies. If you allow her to pursue interests at home, I bet she will want to be there.
I know this is an American perspective on this, but trust me that women want to feel needed and desired and attractive and special to their men. If you do that, not only will she want to stay at home, but when she sees her friends, she will brag about how lucky she has it compared to them.
2006-10-04 09:05:50 · answer #5 · answered by Searcher 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only way out of this is to either let her go out when she wants to without you .. OR .. move to another country where this is not a problem. Good Luck ! :)
2006-10-04 09:04:13 · answer #6 · answered by tysavage2001 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why do you want her to stay home? Mistreating someone only makes them want to leave. If she wants to leave, let her leave. Treat her the way she should be treated and maybe she will want to stay home with you.
2006-10-04 09:03:19 · answer #7 · answered by Jen G 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is because I am an AMERICAN that I can not relate to you on this subject; and any response I give will be a super duper cuss out to you; therefore I will remain quiet on the subject!
2006-10-04 09:02:11 · answer #8 · answered by Mean Carleen 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i would like to give you an answer but i can't because i cannot relate to your culture. talk to someone of your culure who you can confide in and direct you in this situtation.
2006-10-04 09:05:18 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If u dont want anyone to laugh at u then try changing to another religion u fool
2006-10-04 09:03:16 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋