I have a boyfriend of 4 years and I have fallen out of love with him, cause I have fallen inlove with someone else. I have told my boyfriend of 4 years that I was seeing someone else and was falling inlove with this other guy. ( I like to be honest even if it hurts) But he says he will not leave me and whenever he sees me with the other one he will kill him. I know advice will probably to go to the police but since i feel responsible I don't want to go to that extreme. Please advice me I am scared and don't know what to do.
2006-10-04 06:32:46 · 14 answers · asked by Solitaire 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
okay so yeah i am not perfect but after four years he ought to know things are not going to
2006-10-04 07:11:16 · update #1
work out he has cheated on me three times once with my sister and he thinks he still deserves me but it is either his way or no way and i have tried not answering his call and that is when he came to my house and saw me with the other one and almost killed him with a machette, thank god I could convince him of course by leaving with him which i did not want to do.
2006-10-04 07:14:20 · update #2
I think you should seriously talk to your boyfriend in a public place and talk it out. Make sure to bring another friend. You should take this matter very seriously so that you don't regret his actions or yours in case he does react negatively.
Give him sometimes to heal...but if you are no longer in love...don't stay with him out of pity...I did that for someone who sent me the same threats and I jeopardized 3 years of my life.....At the end, you will see it's not worth it.
Good luck
2006-10-04 06:37:29 · answer #1 · answered by Valerie 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He's probably only saying that to scare you but anyway you should let the other guy you are with know this situation... Because if your boyfriend does take this to the extreme the guy you are seeing has the right to know and protect himself, Leave him, ignore his calls and if he comes by your house don't answer the door pretty soon he should get the picture if not get a restraining order they won't arrest him only if he violates him and i'm pretty sure he doesn't want to go to jail so the chances are he'll leave u alone and move on
2006-10-04 06:38:29 · answer #2 · answered by ~*Megan N MaRc~* 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry for your dilemma.
Being honest was the best policy, and BSing him would have only complicated the issue. It also goes to prove that women don't really "fall out of love"... they wake up one day and it's over.
Based on your post, I'm guessing your ex had no real warning signs of how you felt, so it probably fell on him like a hammer. After four years, I'm hoping you took the time to explain to him how your feelings changed and how things are now. (However, if you're leaving him, he probably wasn't listening in the first place!)
Most likely, your ex-boyfriend is just angry and simply venting. However, in these uncertain times where men "snap" and kill those they "love" for no reason, I'm of the opinion that you have reason to be scared. If reasoning with him doesn't work, I wouldn't hesitate to contact someone in law enforcement, get things "on the record", and begin taking steps to protect yourself. He is obviously going through his own rough times (now without you), so (based on your description) he doesn't sound too stable.
Better safe than sorry.
2006-10-04 06:42:35 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your BF of 4 years has some serious control issues. It's not easy finding out that your partner has fallen in love with someone else. Right now he may be acting irrationally, only you know his temperment and wether he is sincere in the threat. Yes, advice to contact the police is an option due to the fact that uttering death threats is a criminal offence. Leave him. If he follows, obtain a restraining order. If he is not sincere in his threat, speak to him and explain the situation so he understands because right now it seems that he is acting on impulse. Please know that the death threats are indeed a criminal offence.
2006-10-04 06:44:12 · answer #4 · answered by coolguy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's just emotional manipulation. Write down exactly what he says every time he says it, and include dates and times. These notes will be admissable as court evidence if it ever should come to that. It probably will not, though. Does your ex have a history of violence? Does he use hard drugs? Does he own a gun or have easy access to one? If the answers to those three questions are no, the risk is very small.
2006-10-04 06:45:01 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to the police like an adult and tell them this. Don't be stupid and wait until he kills the other guy. You don't want to say "Oh I should have" That is what could happen.
By the way you cheated on your boyfriend and you tell his is your way of making yourself feel better. You cheated and he is ticked off. How would you have felt if he told you he found another and you hadn't.
2006-10-04 06:48:04 · answer #6 · answered by Mit 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are STUPID!
Honesty my A22, you just wanted to shove the knife in!
What would possess you to destroy him.
You have started something and its not gonna be good.
I hope you have told the new guy about the death threat. And not making your self out to be a martyr .
You should have just eased out of the relationship and then broken up the regular way.
2 weeks later you could have been openly dating the other guy.
but NO you decide to hurt him worse by throwing it in his face - by saying o honey i'm sorry , I've been cheating and i don't love you anymore, i hope we can still be friends, what kinda bull is that??
And now your gonna get the guy arrested all because you decided to mess around , break his heart, shove it in his face, and then expect him to be OK with that . what are you nuts.
you'd better go talk to his family and explain what you've done. and what your planning to do, including having him arrested. You fool!
2006-10-04 06:42:47 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Can we say stalker? It sounds like he's over protective and controlling. These situations can get entirely out of hand. Don't be so naive, go to the police and get a protection order.
2006-10-04 06:35:36 · answer #8 · answered by rellimztik_arual 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He wont kill him..just trying to scare you...boyfriends get crazy, if he tries anything have the new guy kick his butt, i would if i was the new guy..don't let him pull you down
2006-10-04 06:36:39 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
put a restarining order on your ex boyfriend and have fun if your in love with this other guy thats just the way it is
2006-10-04 06:35:40 · answer #10 · answered by miraclebaby_2006 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋