Are all women like this? I don't want to blow this out of proportion!!?

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Are all women like this? I don't want to blow this out of proportion!!?

Ok, my wife and I have been together for about 5 yrs, and she has always done stuff to just pick fights. Recently (last 8 months), I have taken extreme measures to night fight with her because of our daughter in the house. Well, when I don't fight with her now, she completely loses it. She will grab me really hard and get right in my face and say "oww, your hurting me, let go of me" real loud and in front of the kids. She will make a scene when others are around and say stuff like "You really shouldn't call me those names" -- when I don't say anything at all. She will say some of the meanest things to me to get a response in regards to things she knows I hold dear. She has taken it to the extreme of threatening bodily harm to my daughter if I leave the house to avoid the arguement. Again, I don't want to blow things out of proportion, but I am really concerned and wanted to get someone elses thoughts. Thanks

2006-10-04 06:31:30 · 49 answers · asked by Brian D 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce

One stated the whole truth isn't out -- right -- I do tend to occupy my time now either with my children or with other things around the house (basically because I want to avoid anything that can lead to an arguement). There are 2 sides to every story, and I am not claiming to be perfect. I have said and done things I regret in the past, but (as stated), I am taking steps now to get better. I have hurt her in ways in the past (betrayed her trust in 05), and make no excuse for that. We went to counseling and she decided she wanted to stay and make things work. I am not saying that she does not have the right to be angry, or even hate me for that matter. My question was not to point sides and say how right I am -- I just wanted to know if this was COMPLETELY unusual behavior, or if it was just something men deal with. I do not intend to come off bias or better than her, as I have done things I regret as well, but NEVER have hit her or the children or behaved in this sort of manor.

2006-10-04 06:57:09 · update #1

2006-10-04 06:57:26 · update #2

49 answers

Dude! first off she's psyco, but don't avoid conflit as a way of trying to control and manipulate the situation.

Your making her crazy.

She wants your attention, Give it to her.

Surprise her. like for instance if she starts to bug out. give it to her-

you start to fight about the socks on the floor.
if she wants you to pick them up do it, and then say I'm sorry I'm gonna try to do things diffrently
then walk over to her , grab her in your arms and kiss her right on the mouth. Then tell her , you want to telk about about THAT as soon as possible.

I'll bet you she'll smile . and it diffuses the entire situation,

next if she continues, you put your daughter in her room to watch TV, or the play pen with some cookies.

take her by the hand with out speaking a word, and go straight to the bathroom lift up her skirt and say hello to the little KITTY.

if that doesn't work give her a strawberry, cake, candy, and send her straight to bed she might be tired. when she is finished sleeping it off.

repeat steps 1and 2-

AND if those things don't work then get her some medication. say a prayer. and try harder.

let me know how they work out.

2006-10-04 07:02:22 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋

This kind of behavior is NOT normal. I would be concerned, really concerned. Your wife has some deep deep anger inside. I don't know if it is because of what you did in the past in 05, or something that happened in her past. One thing I can tell you is she has NOT forgiven you for whatever it was that you did. There is no way she has. If she had, she would not be behaving this way. The one thing that pisses me off BIG TIME is that she is using her children to get to you. That is just so so so wrong. Those kids didn't do anything wrong, but yet they are paying the price. This will forever be with them. Your wife needs more than counseling, she needs professional help. She is mentally ill to be doing such things as this. Sorry, but it's true, she needs help ASAP.

2006-10-04 07:11:42 · answer #2 · answered by older&wiserforit 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋

I believe that you obviously care about her, for not only yourself but also for your children. I think that you need to set down with her when your children are not around, and have a serious talk to her, and maybe you can figure out why she has so much hatred and hurt inside of her. If this does not help, you will need to seek professional advice, and maybe see about getting her help. Things like this happen alot, we see it on the television, and read about it in articles, and sometimes the person threatening follows through with it. I would be very concerned for my children. I am a woman, and no, all women are not like this. You can be the one to put a stop to this, and be the better parent. Your children need you. Be strong. Sometimes things change, and you are not meant to stay in the situation. I have been through alot, I am at the moment going through divorce, we have been together for almost 12 years. Married for 6. We have a 6 yr old daughter, and I have tried all I know to put my life back together. It helps to be around positive people, and to spend as much time possible with your children, they are the true experts. They are in the middle of situations they didn't create, and have no control over it. I believe you can make the right decision.

2006-10-04 07:04:51 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋

That B**** is crazy. Either you get her some help or you get out of that house. you and your child. No women dont behave like that . She is setting you up for something. Think about this. Extreme but happening more often. If say,the police should question your children and ask if daddy ever hurt mommy, what would they say. I'm quoting you " "oww , you're hurting me,let go of me" real loud and in front of the kids". Think about it. At that time where will you be, under or above ground She's setting you up for something. Whatever it is it will not be good. Besides think of all the trauma you are inflicting on your children by staying in that condition. Get out.

2006-10-04 06:47:15 · answer #4 · answered by Carrie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋

Go to a therapist on your own and start documenting some of this behavior. Your kids are not safe. She is planning something , did you do something?? If not you better do something, that is not okay. At the least, she wants you to feel powerless and to see that she can be in control. At the worst, she is sick and is going to hurt you somehow. You need to have a credible wittiness and if something happens you will have a therapist in your corner with proof that you were trying to get help. You can go under the radar, with out insurance and find a sliding scale provider, $$$ worth your freedom or child's safety...yes.

2006-10-04 06:40:46 · answer #5 · answered by sweet pea 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋

Wow ... sounds like she's a little crazy ... I've never done any of those things to my man ... nor would I ever want to ... although ... it sounds like you ignore her a lot ... I would too ... but that's not helping the situation ... you two need to sit down and start communicating ... like ADULTS ... shoot I would let her read all these answers too ... maybe that will open her eyes enough to see what she's doing is immature and improper ... there are so many different ways the both of you can communicate ... you just have to sit down and work on it together ... when you're not fighting ... good luck dude ... !

2006-10-04 06:47:57 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋

You're right to be concerned, it's not normal what your wife's doing...She needs therapy...or anger management classes. She has major issues and you should get her to see someone before she really loses it and hurts your kids. Right now it sounds like she's doing everything she can to get a rise out of you, like she wants you to hit her so she has an excuse to get you in trouble.
Get her to go get help. Then perhaps you two should go to couples counseling. If anything, make sure the kids are out of the house when she goes into one of her episodes...

2006-10-04 06:37:48 · answer #7 · answered by Jules 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋

lol are you kidding? Please you cant be this stupid! If your wife is making it look like your beating her in front of your child, and your being verberally abusing her you should know what to do. Get a tape recorder for the car and a video recorder or nanny cams for around the house to bring to court. Take your child and leave, when your married by law either one has custody so its the parent with the child they consider to have custody, the day or day after you leave ask the courts for tempory custody hearing. At that hearing she has to show cause why she should have custody and with your video tape she cant. Also if your in the state of maryland a tape recorder isnt allowed in court, any other state only 1 person being recorded as to know and that would be you. Id also be sure to spend some time with my child to let them know i would never hit or hurt mommy and that you want to help mommy threw her issues. But if the child has seen you hit mommy and call mommy names when you get to court your going to get whats coming to you.

2006-10-04 06:44:18 · answer #8 · answered by letthepartybeginnow 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋

Sorry, but your wife sounds abusive. It is NOT normal, and not "all women" are like that. Talk to some trusted friends to get a better perspective on things. It may be that she has some sort of a mental illness, or maybe she's just a mean disrespectful person.

2006-10-04 06:36:00 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋

I don't agree with the others. That's not normal behavior. She needs to see someone. Especially if she's threatening to hurt the kids. Try counseling. Something isn't right with the relationship if she intentionally trying to hurt you and saying things that are not true to get to you. That's not a healthy relationship.

2006-10-04 06:34:05 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋