now that I have found true love, I could care less where we got married, or how big the diamond is. However, my family thinks I need to have everything that I wanted. But, I know I'm not "settling" because my guy is the best ever. How do I explain my feelings to my family without causing World War 3 ? I love them, and I understand they only want the best for me. But, sometimes love is worth more than money. And my man is worth his weight in gold. And, he feels the same about me. He's always there emotionally, especially when I need him most. I just want a small wedding, and put the extra money into a house or for our future.... Do you think that is wrong?
2006-10-04 06:07:01 · 20 answers · asked by ? 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
I am very happy for you! NO...it is not wrong for you to want a small wedding and it is very mature and sensible for you to put the extra money toward a house or your future.
This wedding is for you and your fiance, not your family. Your family needs to understand that what makes you happy is your man, not the Vera Wang gown and the big reception.
They will probably keep pressuring you for the big wedding so you need to keep explaining to them, logically, that you don't want that. I would assume that if you stand your ground, and they can see how happy you are with your fiance, they will eventually realize you are being sincere in not wanting the expense of a huge ceremony.
Good luck!
2006-10-04 06:13:36 · answer #1 · answered by robobbyta 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Heck no you are not wrong. Everyone who thinks that big weddings are important forget one thing, the marriage itself. I think it is great for you to want to put some of the money back for a house. It is also important that the wedding should include those that you love most, not people your family wants to invite. That maybe one motivation your family has for the big wedding. I am not saying that is what is on their minds, but I have heard of this before. Some families use this to impress their friends and don't think about the bride and groom. Tell them you want a small wedding, just a few family members and friends. Tell them what you have told us, that love is more important than money.
2006-10-04 06:17:04 · answer #2 · answered by kepjr100 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you're being very smart. Of course you love your family, and if they love you, then they will support your decisions. Putting the money you would have spent on a wedding that only lasts a few hours into something that will secure you a better future is the right thing. Just make sure the man you love can assist in securing your future and you're not doing it all yourself.
2006-10-04 06:12:27 · answer #3 · answered by favrd1 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, that's not wrong. Listen to your heart and just explain your feelings to your family. Tell them that Love is worth more than money. If they can't understand that then ask them what happened to the love they felt for each other when they married. Show them that you truly mean what you say and that you are happy with your decision for a small wedding. Remember, it's your wedding not theirs and you DESERVE to have what you think is right.
2006-10-04 06:11:40 · answer #4 · answered by mystri 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No I think you grew up and you saw a fantasy as a girl but as a woman you see the reality. I thought I would have the big wedding etc but when I got engaged the only thing I could think about was getting married and I didnt' care if it was big or courthouse. I married in Vegas with a traditional ceremony but for 1/8 of the cost of a church wedding here. Got my honeymoon all in one trip too.
2006-10-04 06:13:11 · answer #5 · answered by Anjanette A 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I ran off with my hubby and got married at the shore. We paid $35.00 for our wedding (for the J.P.). It was the best decision I could have made to just do it, without all the crap. They were upset, but got over it. I just explained that we did not want to go through all the hassle and that this is what WE wanted.
I've seen too many people pay thousands of dollars for their weddings and get divorced within 5 years. Is that worth it?
2006-10-04 06:12:43 · answer #6 · answered by troxy12 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you plan on being married forever, remember one thing. You're only going to have one wedding and it should one to remember. So that when you look back on it you'll have fond memories of it. And your children and grand children can see how magnificent it was.
It's great that you've found your soul mate, But, make it really special. That way there is happiness all around. Your parents need this too. After all it's for their daughter. Don't be selfish.
2006-10-04 06:15:55 · answer #7 · answered by Cal 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The wedding is just one day in your life but money in a house or savings that's forever. I would want a ceremony but not anything huge because it really is about being with the people you love.
2006-10-04 06:12:13 · answer #8 · answered by dixiedarling 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you're being smart not to waste a bunch of money on the wedding itself. So many people practically bankrupt themselves creating their dream wedding. You're better off putting your money into a honeymoon, a house, some savings, etc..
2006-10-04 06:08:53 · answer #9 · answered by lynnca1972 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do what you and your guy want. When we got married we had only family members at the wedding, cause that was the way my wanted it and we were on a low budget and both of us wanted to go out west on our honeymoon.
2006-10-04 07:19:48 · answer #10 · answered by Alien 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋