What would you do if in the midst of a dispute your step child said.....?

Question

On Tuesday his son (Billy the 18 year old) had an attitude for what reason I don’t know. Anyhow, I was concerned because I though it stemmed from having to watch the children and stuff so I asked him what was wrong and he ignored me. So, I told William it was disrespectful for him to just ignore me as if he didn’t need to justify me with a response even if it were, “Debbie I don’t want to talk about it”. So yesterday I came home and cooked diner and made everyone a plate but him because he was upstairs in “Nia & Sierrah” room. I told William I am still a little bothered about yesterday so I would not be fixing Billy a plate however, I would leave him some food in the pot incase the boy wanted to eat. I told William that I needed to run to the store to take some things back because the store would be closing soon and that I made myself a plate and it’s in the microwave (he was on the computer, mind zapped out as usual). When I came home I copped and attitude after I went to the

microwave (he was on the computer, mind zapped out as usual). When I came home I copped and attitude after I went to the microwave to get my diner it was gone. I knew before William could even explain that it was because he was so immersed in that damn game he didn’t pay any attention and I was right. After that I just decided to go upstairs in my room until my temper was gone. I went back down stairs in the kitchen to make a bowl of cereal when I noticed that their wasn’t any food left in the pans and that the plate I had made had only one bit off the chicken and was left (so now I am out of diner I cooked just so that his son could mess over it).

When I started to explain to William that this was the reason I was upset, Billy said “Why don’t you shut up and stop acting like a child”. You know that got me mad but I was even madder when he continued to argue back with me once I told him to mind his business. I wasn’t even talking to him, and what gave him the right to think he could have say in any damn thing in the house. I told William that he needed to go have a word with his son because if he didn’t I was going to go down stairs and do it “My way”. William made excuse after excuse and even told me his son’s comment was right. You know I was out raged. He didn't even say anything to the by.

Answer 1

You need to make the father understand your problem. Like maybe doing nothing around the house except for you. Make yourself dinner, do your laundry and clean up your stuff.

Tell him that if he wanted to choose his son over you then so be it. But you will not be acting the wife until he is acting like a supporting husband and not letting another person walk all over you.

Answer 2

Ohh dear.. Well it depends why they said it? I'm only 14 and can be pretty harsh when I'm in a bad mood. But after I say some things I feel really bad and realize I don't meen it. I always complain my mom is too protective and untrusting, and sometimes I really need some space. Maybe that's how your child feels? Because no parent is perfect but it seems like you are a good enough parent to question things like this. Some situations like this get better & some don't, and if I'm anything like your daughter/son they feel like they never get to make their own descisions. Be reasonable, & things will be much better. I really do wish you goodluck & hope I helped! (:

Answer 3

You sound like to like to nit pick and nag. The kid is 18 years old, an adult. Why does it matter if he ate the plate from the microwave or out of the pot? Quit being petty. Cause you are in a bad mood, you are not going to fix him a plate the next day. Jeez act like an adult. (someones got to) Maybe that's why he doesn't like you. Get Counseling as a family.

Answer 4

Your stepson should have responded to you when you asked him a question. BUT to me it seems childish to act the way you did over the food. I know sometimes it's easy to stoop to that level when you're mad (I know I've done it too) It sounds to me like you all need to figure out how to show each other more respect and how to stop nit picking.

Answer 5

maybe u could try family counseling. there are too many factors involved & the space here is limited; so that's the best advice i can give u. even if u're the only one who goes, it'll still help u in the long run.

Answer 6

Tonight let both of them make their own dinner ! If either one says any thing let them know that you didn't know if this job was any longer your business as you eat your own dinner .

Answer 7

I would leave and let them fend for themselves. That father and son act alike.

Answer 8

Having step kids is rough... If you find any great answers out there - please share!