I have a close friend that is committing adultry with a married woman. He is 36 and lonely and she is married but her husband lives in another state. This affair has been going on for about a month. He says the chemistry between them is unbelievable and they click on so many levels and now the relationship has turned physical and they are having sex. He wants to break it off and keeps referring to the 10 commandments and sinning. I told him thats great that they click so well but she is still marrield albiet unhappily. What should I tell him? I mean, I have never ever seen him so happy and she is in love with him. He wants to break it off but he is so tempted to keep it going at the same time because he loves spending time with her. He keeps calling for advice but I dont know quite what to say. Please help with any advice you may have.
2006-10-04 03:30:09 · 30 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
No advise....just a good hi-five
2006-10-04 03:34:12 · answer #1 · answered by Andy S 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Hers some advice from someone on the the other side. My wife had affairs during our marriage. When I found out I became a awalking zombie, couldnt sleep, couldnt eat, paced the floors 24 hrs a day. If your friend can do that to another person then hes an awful excuse for a human being, and if the wife can do that to her husband, what do you think she'll eventually do to him? Tell him that while hes at it why not kill the guys dog, slit his tires, beat up his mother too?
2006-10-04 03:37:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
People kill me with their judgements and using the bible and religion to justify their closed mindedness. If you do not know their situation, you really can't comment. She could be an abused wife scared to leave her husband. There could be something the husband is holding over her that she doesn't want to come out the reason she can't leave. The bottom line is you can't help who you fall in love with and if they are truly happy and in love, then they need to figure out how best to take the relationship to the next level. And just because she cheated on her husband, it does NOT mean she will do it to him. If you tell a lie, does it mean you will always lie?
2006-10-04 03:51:09 · answer #3 · answered by HunnyB 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she is so unhappy with her marriage then she needs to be the one to decide if what she has done is worth ending her marriage..Im glad your best friend is happy but he really should of keeped his distance this woman took vouls (sp) sorry..Im sure shes lonely and bored and your friend is helping by keeping her company and one thing led to another....But if they both love each other and shes not in love with her husband any more than she needs to tell her husband and she needs to go! But what make your friend think she wont ever cheat on him..."once a cheat always a cheat" Good luck too all!!!
2006-10-04 03:38:23 · answer #4 · answered by machele 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that if she really loves him, then she needs to make the situation right. And to be completely honest with the girl. She has no respect for herself if she is disrespecting her body be being with 2 men. She needs to make the decision and come back to your friend when she has left her husband. Tell your friend that his safety is at stake b/c her husband could just flip/snap when he finds out his wife is sucking another man's....... She needs to be a woman and get her priorities together, and he needs to be a bigger man and follow the word of God, he will be punished for any wrong doing, so why suffer when he can choose not too
2006-10-04 03:50:28 · answer #5 · answered by sassy lady 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he needs to give this woman a choice, if she loves him she will get a divorce and be with him, there is no reason for her to stay in a unhappy marriage unless she has kids or no means to support herself, either way she needs to be honest with her husband, her self and your friend, she is not helping anything by living a double life. The affair needs to end complelty, your friends needs to remove himself from the picture. It does not sound like she has much of a marriage anyway so I dont see why she is still married.
2006-10-04 03:43:11 · answer #6 · answered by confusedpatricia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since he is a man he is probably not concerned about the duration and depth of this relationship but just a fling he is going through. So dont even bother telling him that the woman is married and will not commit to him etc.
You can tell him that it is not fair to the woman's husband and when we do not approve of something we should be the first not practicing such sleezy behavior.
2006-10-04 03:40:12 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've been on both sides of this one. In truth he is having a relationship and she is having an affair. He is not responsible for her marriage vows she is.
Let him have his funny. Eventually things will have to change because one or the other will want more or less than what the other one is giving. Like in all relationships it will either end or grow. Its his life let him live it.
2006-10-04 04:42:13 · answer #8 · answered by snack_daddy10 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why does the husband live in another state? Are they separated? If so and provided no children are involved then let it be. If she has kids then he needs to stay away. If she wants to self destruct then fine but don't let him help torture her kids. Even if they don't know now they will in time. Married women is a no no.
2006-10-04 03:38:02 · answer #9 · answered by Hollli 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd tell him he is on his own and that you will stand by him when the affair he is having is over. It is not you place to make moral judgements. It is you place to be a friend when he needs it.
PS Tell you buddy to pack a gun in case the husband shows up at a bad time
2006-10-04 05:44:13 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ten commandents aside, because don't believe in religion, what he is doing is very cowardly. I don't care how happy it makes him. He should stop acting like a spoiled brat and stop banging a married woman. If she's to weak a person to resist cheating on her husband he should be big enough not to.
2006-10-04 03:42:29 · answer #11 · answered by St.Anger 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋