hey, im 16 i wanna baby, good or bad idea?

Question

hey i have a really great boyfriend and we dated for 8 months, im on birth control but i am so crazy to have a baby, im gonna be 17 in february, can i get pregnant while on birth control or do i gotta come off it? is it too young for me to have a baby? we both really want one but im not 100% sure if im doing the right thing,
were gonna be fiance in december and i plan to move out in summer 2007
i need some advice on wat you think i should do

Answer 1

Okay first, DUH, birth control is to stop you from getting pregnant. SOME women get pg on the pill, but if used correctly, the pill is 99.9% effective in PREVENTING pregnancy.
Second, DUH, you're 16. You've been dating 8 months? Wow. I bet you've learned a lot from all your experience in that time, and at 16 nonetheless, to know his level of devotion. Are you even out of highschool yet? You're 16. How are you going to raise this child? Do either of you have a job? How much do you make? Do you realize that one package alone of diapers can cost you 15 dollars and last only about a week? You don't even live together, how do you know you'll be able to stand him when you're under the same roof? Wait until you're graduated, MARRIED, and at least stable before trying to bring a child into this world. Can you honestly say that in your situation right now that you could give a child all you want for it?

Answer 2

It's actually a HORRIBLE idea!!!
You're a baby having a baby and four years down the road you'll regret your decision.
You're seeing only one side of the child issue when you need to look at the whole picture.
You're still in school, you'll be tied down with a child that demands every ounce of your effort and attention. No running with the girlfriends unless you can afford a sitter while you're out and about. No dates unless you plan for a sitter first.
There's poopy diapers, upset bellies, spit-up, heating bottles at 3 AM, constant crying and you have no idea why this child is crying and it can't tell you, pacing the floor when its sick and very rarely a full nights rest until its 6-10 weeks old.
PLEASE, if you can, rent a baby first. It's a baby doll with a computer chip that makes it act like a real baby. It'll cry at the most inopportune times, like a real one, and you have to figure out why it's crying and it won't stop until you do, just like a real one.
Don't take the chance of wrecking your lives this early in the game. You may THINK you want a child, but having one is so totally different than just thinking about it.
If you have a relative that has an infant, or a friend, ask if you can baby sit for a week and find out what it's like before you jump into this with both feet and closed eyes. They'll be thankful for the break, and you'll get only a taste of motherhood.
Kids are a huge responsibility, they're cute and cuddly at first but they grow up quickly and demand a lot. Not only time and effort, but money as well.
Think about this carefully and all the way through before you commit yourselves to a having a child, that three years down the road, you discover you didn't really want. Once its born, it's too late to rethink the plan.
Education first, then jobs, then marriage, then kids. A lot less stress like that if you do it in that order. Trust me, I've been there.
Sorry this is so long.

Answer 3

You are still very young! And have so much life to live. And you have only been dating for 8 months. Go to college, party! Get a good job, get married and then have a baby. I don't think that anybody under 22 should have a child.

Sounds like you just want someone to love and to love you. Why don't you get a puppy or kitten.

Kids are a 24/7 life time job. There are no breaks or vacations when you have them. And you can't leave them in the back yard when you want to go out!

I have a 3 year old son. I had him when I was 30. Right now it is 3:12 AM in Ca. And I am up because he wanted something to eat and doesn't want to go to sleep!

Please wait at least 7 more years. Enjoy being a young adult. Have fun.

Answer 4

Take it from me, YOU DO NOT NEED A BABY!! Not at 16. Your life will never be the same. Sure, kids are great and all that, but once you get older it will effect you emotionally and financially. You will never have the option to just get up and go whenever you feel like it. You will have to work everyday to take care of your baby. It will take it's toll on you. I had my first baby at 19 and I regret it so much now. I love my son more than anything in this world, but there was so much stuff that I missed out on and I will never have the chance to have that again.
Just take your time and enjoy being a teenager. You'll become a mother when the time is right, and believe me, now is not a good time for either of you.

Answer 5

I know without looking that I'm joining a chorus. You cannot raise a child at 16. It would be impressive if the child even lived into it's 20's forget any kind of hope for a good life for that young person and your life would pretty much be a joke.
Babies are complicated. Nobody knows enough to raise them perfectly but generally people with a solid education and 25 years of experience under their belt can avoid some of the mistakes in raising a kid that will scar them badly. You're talking about playing roulette with your child's wellbeing by raising it was a child yourself. Where will you learn about a child's health and psychological developement? What resources will you have if something goes wrong? What's your plan?
Babies are expensive, expensive enough that two professionsals with considderably savings have to tighten the belt to have a child. You and your boyfriend don't have the experience or education to hold jobs that will pay enough to cover the minimal expenses of a child, not even if you're working in porn or slinging drugs and if you're raising a baby neither of you will have a chance to get them. You will be broke and stay broke and your child will live in abominable conditions eating what you can aford with public assistance.
Babies grow up. Your baby will become a teenager, they will be 16 and her primary role model can't tell her that it's wrong to get knocked up at 16 because she can do math and knows how old you were.

No offence to your boyfriend but he's not going to be a good dad. Nobody dating 16 year olds has the honest maturity to take responsibility for the developement of a human life and there's something fundamentally wrong with him if he's prepared to sign away any of the fun and freedom he has until he's 34 to help you be a mother. I'm sure he's supportive now but I guarentee you if you get pregnant he'll be gone in a year tops and I don't blame him. If I got roped into being the beast of burden so that a girl could make her dream of being a mom come true, I'd hate you. He'll be gone and you'll be doing this on your own. I'm sure you're cute and think boys grow on trees but you'll find that a young single mom couldn't get a boyfriend if her breasts dispensed Vodka and liquid NFL. The ones you can get aren't the ones you want for your kid.

What you're contemplating is nightmarishly horrible not only for you but for your child. Please don't even joke about voluntarilly having a child before 25.

Answer 6

If you don't know weather you can get pregnant on birth control or not than that should tell you that you are way to young to have a baby. I am a mother of two and it is not all fun and games. You have you whole life ahead of you to have a baby you will be making a huge mistake if you decide to go ahead with it, Have you even decided how you would raise a child what if your boyfriend can't handle it their is a lot to think about. Please think of your future their will be not going out with friends they will all be enjoying life and you will be a home with a baby I cannot stress enough that this would be a huge mistake. Even though you will be engaged I think it is much better for the both of you to experience life before you bring a child into the world. PLEASE BE CARE FULL.

Answer 7

what are you going to do with your life think about it a child goes where ever you go does everything you do when a child is first born you get up every 2 hrs to feed it then at about 6wks every 4 hrs then eventually at about 6 mnths the child may be sleeping threw the night think about how much diapers and formula costs then you have to factor in the costs of the baby bed the clothes wich they outgrow at an alarming rate i'm sure you have a friend or family member who has a young child between a yr and 6 mnths old if you think your ready offer to give the parents a break for the weekend that means get the baby friday right after school and keep it untill sunday night see how you like it and if you do then get an egg and carriy it around all day every day for at least 6 wks this is your newborn this "child" depends on you for everything name it give it a sex and remember every 2 hrs it needs to be feed and changed this proccess takes about half an hr if you make it threw that without cracking your egg -killing your child- then re-evaluate what you will be going threw if this was a real baby with the dirty diapers and the spit ups and the crying by the way your boy friend of this "long" relationship needs to do the same thing oh in in all of this you both have to find a babysitter for your child and pay out real money for the hours that you two are at school because in real life you both would have to quit school and get jobs just to maybe pay the bills i hate to tell you but there is alot more to being a parent than simply having a baby oh and if no one you know will let you watch there real child for that amount of time you really need to listen to them they can tell your responsibility development a whole lot more than you can you being so emotional about this but honestly your way to young in my oppinion i'm 38 with a seven yr old in the house and sometimes it is more than i can handel and financially it's ruining us think please think about what you want to do with your life besides have a baby you can have a baby later a few yrs down the road after you are married buying your own home etc. then think about it again

Answer 8

If your not finanically stable, on your own, not your parents, Then your most deffinitally not married. Not to mention boys at that age are most of the time not what they seem. Honostly, wait until your married. That way its less likely for your man to turn on you. Not to mention your boyfriend being a great guy and you being together 8 months isnt much of a foundation. 8 months may seem like forever, however its not really very long. I know you really want a baby, but think about this, you will have NO LIFE! no parties, no going out, vitually no sleep. Its very hard ot raise a child. If your planing on going to college, getting an education is very difficult with a child. Even more so, holding a job is virtually impossible unless you plan to put the child in day care. If you put the child in day care, at your age you will not have a job making enough to do anything but cover daycare fees. Money is super important. yes theres ways to make it easier, thrift stores, yard sells.. yada yada but it just wont cut it. You need to be in a financially stable sistuation. Secondly, to answer your other question.. birth control is made to prevent pregnancy, its possible but very unlikely to get pregnant on birth control, so if you did want a baby you would have to get off birthcontrol. Make sure your commited, not just now, but for the rest of your life.. Dont just jump into a decision, once its happen, its happen. Please be smart. think very rationally about this. Not just "i really want it so i know i can do it" that may seem true but its not the case.. I suggest atleast putting it off until marriage and financial stability. If you want a child so bad you must want the best for your child, and secuirty. You dont want to have to tell your child "we cant afford new shoes" or struggle for diaper money. Thats a life changing choice.. be careful. Think not only about yourself but about the life your going to bring into this world.

Answer 9

Can you support a baby or would your parents be supporting your baby? Where are you going to live? They do grow up you know. Are you prepared to wake up all hours of the night to feed your baby? Will you breast-feed or bottle-feed? What IF there are medical problems with the baby, who will take care of the expenses? Are you prepared to buy diapers, clothing, take care of the cost of check-ups? Can you afford insurance? How will pay for a home, car, electricity, phone, AND your baby?

Why not wait a few more years until after you've completed your education, have a steady job, have a house, car, etc.? Once you have a child, that is that, there is no going back. It's hard when you've been with someone a couple of years, and even if you are prepared with home, car, etc. (you need not be rich to desire a child and love one), let alone make a decision based on a gushy-mushy lovey feeling. Who is going to care for your baby while you're at work, or do you automatically deem that job for your mother?

Answer 10

The most important questions is if you will be able to financially support the baby?
Second, what are your expectations for the baby? Why do you wan't a baby so soon? (And don't say just because they are cute)
Will your boyfriend stand the pressure of supporting you and the baby? Remember you have been together for only 8 months. A baby is a long term issue. Couples are blindly in love for the first year for most of the times (I should include my self in that group) but after that year you kind of 'go back to reality' and think about what's going onwith your life and if you are making the right decisions.
Good luck.