I will tell you how to stop people from hating gays?

Question

I asked myself, how can we stop people from hating us, here is my answer:
Stop having homoerotic parades, Is there really a need to have ***** and breast hanging everywhere? This gives people the impression that we are not stable enough to raise children.

Give up the rainbow, I understand that we want people to know that we are gay, but a rainbow flag, is a little to much. If you want people to stop steriotyping us give up the rainbow, it is VERY girly. Not Im not saying we shouldnt have a flag, but why cant we have something more suddle.

Go to church. If we give people the impression that we have some "morals" and that we are not sex crave porn addict, you will see people opinion of you change.

I know alot of people isnt going to like what I have to say, but my real issue is that we always want to be PROUD COLORFUL AND LOUD, but in my opinion we need to be Americans with high morals, if we want to stand out, suffer the conseques of right wing ratical opinion of you!

Ok to further by explanation, is that we always say that we want to be treated "normal". But when we flaunt our gayness, because we are PROUD, we open the opinions of people in a NEGATIVE view of ourselves. We are all adults and I will tell you the reality of this. Having a gay parade, doesn’t educate people. You educate people by being an everyday example. Furthermore, the thing that bothers me is that we can have thousands of people going to parades, but we can only get fewer than a hundred gays to go to there state congress, and protest against a anti gay law, are you kidding me. YES, being gay ISNT wrong, and you shouldnt be something that you are not, but I hardly see having a gay flag, and a gay parade, is part of who you are. And yes I am gay.

ps. you guys are looking to hard at my statement of going to church, what I am saying is have high morals

Answer 1

Do you have a question?

Answer 2

I understand what you are feeling but even if we all did as you suggested the hate would not stop.
There was a time, not too long ago,when the rainbow flag, parades, and even gay churches were unknown and that was a time when gays had no where to turn except towards each other. The Hate coming from the straight sector was unbelievable. I know for I lived it.
There will come a time when things will, hopefully, calm down but I don't see it happening until EVERYONE has equal rights.
As for Gays going to church, many of us do and work for the betterment of the areas we live in. But In the area I live in we can not erect a permanent sign for our church due to possible retaliation and this is 2006.
P.S. Most Gays have morals but you only read and hear about the more flamboyant ones. Nuff said.

Answer 3

I agree pretty much with what you're saying, especially about the pride parades. I've only seen two such parades and the only parts that really moved me were the simple ones like the gay parents that came by in droves with their babies in strollers.

But c'mon, how can we expect to go to church when religious people go out of their way to say how much they hate us? Also, there's not even a lot of straight people that go to church. Perhaps what's needed is some sort of community bonding -- something that doesn't involve drinks and derobing -- that both brings us together and shows the straight folks that we're nevertheless moral people.

As for the rainbow flag, it's already too established to discard, although I agree it is a bit loud. I think the pink triangle is subtle enough and has enough irony behind it to stand for something (and our people just love irony).

A lot of your gripes have a lot to do with how the media portrays us. The same could be said about the right wing too -- not all religious people are homophobes or don't believe in evolution, but we still get that impression from the media.

Answer 4

I find it in interesting that you say "we" and "us" through most of your post but it by saying "you".

Are you really gay?

The flag and parades are because we have been compromised out of all prior civil rights and human rights efforts. We still do not have equal rights and privledges recognized under the law. In 40 of the 50 US states, gays can still be fired or denied housing JUST because someone found out they were gay.

Many gay people do go to church. If you read you listen to most of the churches and preachers, ministers, priests, etc., we are an abomination - which is the reason so many gays/lesbians take issue with the righteous fundamentalists. I have no intention attending a service where I'm told who I was born as is not good enough for god.

Answer 5

Jim, you're speaking like being a gay is interchangeable. it really is not any longer. in spite of the indisputable fact that, those who can no longer procreate would not count because the quantity of births and deaths are irrelevant. delivery isn't proportional to lack of life in any respect. The human race isn't going extinct. what's worse, the planet as already exceeded the wearing potential, so faster or later the international would come to end by skill of starvation. fortunately we've engineering and agriculture for that. i might want to bypass on..and get off subject matter. anyhow, enable human beings be loose thinkers, it truly is what makes us human. i do not recommendations them hating, shows a foul personality in them. in the adventure that they get actual, then it truly is diverse.

Answer 6

I understand what you are saying, but you and the straights out there must realize that the majority of gay men and women are NOT out at Pride Parades and such. We are working men and women who work along side our straight co-workers and dont admit to being gay becuase of a fear of reprisal. The problem with being "normal" is that we arent being noticed. Straights dont realize how many gays they know, because they only see the gays that get the press on TV.

Answer 7

Ok, I will take this question one point at a time.

Not all of us go to parades. Those of us who do are doing it in fun. It does not mean that we are sex craved sickos, we're all adults and we're just showing pride in ourselves.

There is nothing wrong with the rainbow. I don't sport it but I believe it is a good symbol, as it represents all the diversity that can be found amongst us all.

Not everyone believes in god, and you don't have to go to church to have high morals. I don't go to church, but I have morals. I don't steal, kill, say hateful things to people, judge people, love my family and friends, etc.

The best way to stop people from hating us is just to be ourselves and to not conform to stereotypes just because we think we have to. I'm a completely "normal" guy and when I tell people that I'm gay they are really shocked. Some of them even come back and say "but you're so normal" or whatever. Like what is that supposed to mean? I'm just being me, I'm not trying to fit into anyone's image except mine.

Answer 8

Yeah, and then the haters will find another reason to hate us.

Look, if this is what you want to do, do it. But not everyone has to or wants to live like this.

I'm Pagan. I'm not going to any church.

I'm a girl. I don't mind being girly. And the way our society treats both men and women who don't conform to current gender norms *needs* to be challenged.

I don't go to parades, but since straight people have Mardi Gras and Spring Break, I don't see what the major problem with the occasional out-of-hand parade is.

You have confused your own lifestyle choices and preferences as a mandate for others, the way 'phobes do to us.

Answer 9

I've always sort of thought it was funny that a lot of the people who have problems with gay are bible thumpers. Those same people should know that one of the main things about being Christian is to "love thy neighbor".
I also don't really think that gay people need a flag. Why is it neccesary really?
I'm totally not saying that you shouldn't be proud of who you are but that would be like having a special flag for doctors or catholics or any group. It's sort of dumb.
Having said that, I don't care if someone is gay, black, muslim, jewish, white, chinese etc. etc. There are assholes everywhere and there are also great people too so nobody should really judge. It is sort of human nature to do so though I guess.

Answer 10

First off.. to the guy who posted first to this..WAKE UP DING DONG!!! YOU CAN NOT, RAISE A CHILD TO BE GAY!!! Get your head out of your ***', and wake up... ignorance, is NO excuse for you!!

I agree, with the writer of this comment/non-question, lol... Stop putting yourselves out there, and people will back off - Ex. like parades. Bringing outlandish attention to yourselves, will only hurt you and bring more criticism. Just be yourselves, theres nothing wrong with that. Sexual perferences of people..dont make you a good or bad person. Being true to yourselves and others, makes you a better person.
I'm not gay, but i have some gay male friends... And i couldnt have asked for some better freinds, than them. And one of them is 'legally' married to another guy and they raise a little girl. And i'll be honest, they do a terrific job with her. She actually is the most sweetest and well mannered child, i've ever seen. And they sure as hell, arent teaching her to be gay. Thats just stupid...you cant do that. Being gay is a chemical thing.. not a learned trait. And people who think its a taught/learned thing, are just idiots.

Answer 11

I can see your point of view on some of what you mentioned. I don't quite understand why the gay community needs a flag all to their own. Why such a stereotypically gay one at that? A rainbow? Come on! I wonder what gay man came up with that. Now the rest of us have to be labelled with that. Thanks, whoever you are. Not all of us are THAT gay.

I think it's pretty ironic how gay people want to stop being stereotyped. Well, don't you think it might help if you stop acting like the stereotype? Jeez, are we children here or what? This is not that hard to understand. If you act a certain way, people are going to call you on your behavior. Not that all gays are like this, but I sure as hell don't appreciate the gays that do promote the negative stereotype because they make life more difficult for the gays like me! So naturally, I'm going to have some anger towards them.

I've gone to several large gay oriented events and all I have to say is, OH MY GOD! Could we be more morally bankrupt and promote that negative stereotype? The last gay pride event I went to I about had a fit. There were so many walking stereotypes it was pathetic. When your once-a-year gay pride parade welcomes floats with dancing go-go boys in their tighty whities, you need a serious reality check! Nothing to be...ahem, proud of. I was there for all of 5min. before some gay male stereotype walked up to me and made a cheap pass at me. I was not shocked, to say the least. I'm sure I would have been flattered had I been that type of guy. But alas, I'm not.

I can understand wanting to be proud of who you are, but I'm amazed at the arrogance some gay people have to be proud of themselves when there is little about them to be proud of in the way they carry themselves as human beings. Not exactly upstanding citizens, to say the very least. BEING GAY IS NOT AN EXCUSE TO ACT HOWEVER YOU WANT! We all, as human beings, have to take responsibility for our actions.

Because I'm gay I know I have to work harder at getting people's respect. Acting however I want is surely not the way to get that. If you want people to stop judging us, the gay community, and stop seeing us in such a poor light, stop acting like asses! You can't pick your nose in public and not expect someone to look at you funny, if you catch my drift. As long as we make such a song and dance out of the fact we're gay and do it in such a morally bankrupt way, I can promise you there will be a lot of people hating us. Heck, I'm gay and I don't even like most of the crap I see and hear about in the gay community. In fact, it makes me embarrassed and NOT proud to be gay!

I'm sure to half of America, the gay community wouldn't look quite as bad if we were regular church go'ers. However, I am not a church go'er and I've met plenty of people who are that...have a lot of work on themselvs to improve their behavior, to say the least. There are good and bad people of every group. As long as there are people of any group promoting the negative stereotype with their piss-poor behavior, the stereotype will remain.