Okay here I go well... I have been with my high school sweetheart for 12 years and almost marrierd for 8 years. Look this is the promblem well I often have problems with females calling my house telling me that they were messing with my man. I didnt leave him alone because in the past females would say stuff because they wanted to be with him. yes, I know they wanted him because I was there a couple times when they would hit on him. . I just founded out that he has a one year old. He just told me about her when I was doing his clothes I found the little girls picture. I asked him about it and he said I was meaning to tell you about her but i didnt know when the time was right or how you were going to react. I was so hurt I wanted to hurt him but I just told him to leave and I didnt want to ever see him again. Well he back but I think he is still messing with her! what should I do leave him for good?I really dont think I could every trust him again he has always lied to me.
2006-10-03 12:23:35 · 30 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Trust is something that once it is gone you can hardly gain it back from the person who lies and deceives you. This child is one years old and he forgot, honey he will say anything to keep you off his back. You need to decide if it is worth it to your health and well being to stay in a marriage where you will always wonder about what he is doing. You will get a lot of answers on here, but it is what you feel is best for you. Only you know how you feel and whether it can be saved.
2006-10-03 12:30:04 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
You should leave.
First of all he went outside the marriage and had unprotected sex and got someone pregnant and now there is a child in the picture.
He has been lying to you for a while now. Just think how long they have been sleeping together, then a woman is pregnant for nine months, and the child is one. That's a little too much to handle. He's nothing but a liar, a cheater, a deceiver, and a heart breaker and you don't want this man in your life.
He will only hurt you over and over again. Why accept something that should have never happened in the first place. I sympathize with you on this because if this were me I would be going insane right now. You will most likely never be able to trust him again so if you did stay you wouldn't be happy at all.
Good Luck!
2006-10-03 19:31:15 · answer #2 · answered by miss_lady6980 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Leave him. I was with someone who lied and cheated on me and I recently found out that he's still doing the same to his present girlfriend. He's gone through 4 girlfriends since we broke up almost 7 years ago and I've been with the same guy whom I started dating a year after we broke up. I know it's not the easiest thing to get through, but it's better than living a lie. A relationship is nothing without trust and loyalty. Good communication is also important and it seems as though he has none of the above.
2006-10-03 19:36:27 · answer #3 · answered by H o n є y 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hope you don't think I'm being rude, but this is a no-brainer. He cheated on you in the past, and that union produced a child. Of course he's still in contact with the child's mother. If he isn't willingly, then he will be legally.
Once trust is broken, it's hard to regain it. And you can't have a good, healthy relationship without trust. If you're reluctant to let go, suggest counseling to him. If he truly does want to work things out with you, he'll most likely agree.
No matter what, best of luck to you. It's hard to deal with a partner's infidelity, and even harder to decide which route to take afterwards.
2006-10-03 19:46:05 · answer #4 · answered by Amelie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless you can give a really good reason to stay with your husband, I think you already know the answer to this question.
Why in the world would you stay? Don't stay because you know him and because he's been the only serious relationship in your life. That's not reason enough. Don't stay because you're afraid of what will happen if you don't. Be afraid of what will happen if you stay. Don't stay because you don't have money saved, your families will be upset or it's embarrassing if you leave.
Your husband does not honor you as his partner. He disrespects you daily. He does not have your best interest at heart. He does not care about himself or you by going out and having unsafe sex. I don't care if he uses a condom; if he's married, any sex outside of marriage is unsafe. He has a child by someone other than his wife.
Again: Why in the world would you stay?
2006-10-03 19:31:44 · answer #5 · answered by Le_Roche 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl you deserve better. If he did that to you already he's not going to stop. 12 year relationship and he now comes out that it was a lie. There are better guys out there. Good Luck. I do not believe in once a cheater always a cheater from personal experience. But this is a huge secret to keep. Especially since he got another girl knocked up with his kid when you his "wife" should be a mother. My vote is to LEAVE HIM.
2006-10-03 19:28:17 · answer #6 · answered by VMG 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No Trust? The relationship will be bound for disaster. I know you love him, because you wouldn't be asking for our opinions. Relationships can be difficult. But, you have decide if you would rather "hurt a little now or a whole lot later", if he deceives you again and doesn't change.
2006-10-03 19:39:16 · answer #7 · answered by BB 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave. Go. That's a bit too big of a secret in a long-term relationship and probably not the only one he kept.
If he has always lied to you, let this be the last straw.
2006-10-03 19:26:44 · answer #8 · answered by Alex G 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why would you even be asking? The guy is a liar and a cheater, you'll be hurt again and again if you stay in this relationship. Not all guys are like that, believe me. Learn your lessons, and try again with someone else.
2006-10-03 19:28:24 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
it will hurt for awhile but dont be with a man that lies and possibly cheat or is cheating . it took him a year to tell you about your step child what else is he hiding ? LEAVE
2006-10-03 20:23:01 · answer #10 · answered by devde 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋