Should I accept cheating?

Question

My gf cheated on me after 2 years of love, and she told me what she did 2 days ago. She said she is sorry, and that she lost control over herself.
It is very hard to accept it, and very hard to let the girl go away!! what should I do.
I have always feared cheating, and now it happened to me. My nightmare has become true.
I almost slapped the girl on the face, but i could contain the situation. I told her that i want to be alone for few days. I am totally lost.
Someone told me "if you accepted cheating once, you will accept it everytime it happens, and the girl herself will not respect you the way she used to do"
is he right?
Help me

Answer 1

Honestly, it would be hard for me to forgive as it would always be gnawing at me. But you will have to ask yourself if you can live with that kind of pain.

I saw a show on cheaters on Dr. Phil. He gave some good advice. Read on:
If You Are Being Cheated On:

Get real.
The best predictor of future behavior is relevant past behavior. What do you predict? If your partner has cheated on you repeatedly and now swears he/she will stop, what are the chances that this is true? You can't change what you don't acknowledge. Isn't there a point at which you say, "I deserve better. My children deserve better. He/She may not have any boundaries, but I do. And my boundaries say, 'You either treat me with integrity, dignity and respect or you don't treat me at all'?" Stand up for yourself and for your children. You've given your power away and you've got to get it back.

This is not your fault.
Stop beating yourself up about this. You have got to know that this has nothing to do with you. You are not the one who made the decision to break your commitment to your partner and cheat. You have nothing to do with your partner making the immature, inappropriate, self-destructive choice to turn away from you to someone else.

What is your payoff?
Do you want to get past this? Or is there a payoff you receive from the situation? Do you enjoy playing the victim or subjecting your partner to a life sentence? Do you fear that if you forgive a partner who truly is remorseful and has changed his/her behavior that you are "letting them get away with it?"

Assess your commitment level.
You can either handle being vulnerable with your partner again or you can't. And if you can't, you need to get out of this relationship and move on. And if you can, then you need to let him/her earn the trust back and start putting this relationship together again.

Consider the consequences.
If you have children, your decision will affect them as well. You do have responsibility here for what you do next. You have to make a decision about whether or not justice is best served by allowing your partner to re-earn your trust, or if it's better not to subject your family any longer to the current situation.

Decide if you can choose to forgive.
Forgiveness is a choice. It doesn't mean what your partner did is OK. How much you trust your partner is in part about what your partner does, and in part a function of whether you have confidence to handle it if he/she disappoints you. If you find out that he/she strays again, can you handle that?

If you can't forgive, let go.
When you choose the behavior, you choose the consequences. If you continue to throw this in your partner's face, you will eventually run him/her off. Ask yourself if this is going to be a life sentence for your partner. Can you heal from this and forgive? If not, don't continue to live in anger and/or be with someone who causes you pain.

Answer 2

The only way you should take her back is if you can truly FORGIVE her. Otherwise you will never trust her and you may bring it up time and time again, which will just bring further conflict. It won't be fair to you because you will always be worrying and won't be able to give your whole heart, and it won't be fair to her because you won't have really forgiven her, and she will wind up being tormented as will you. It takes a long time and a lot of work to get back ruined trust, is that something you are willing to do? If you don't think you can deal with this break it off immediately, don't drag yourself through anymore heartache. Make it clear to her why you feel the way you do- there are plenty of other women who are faithful. There are consequences to every action positive and negative! Remember that!

Answer 3

maximum adult males cheat. that doesn't make it precise, or incorrect. It relies upon on what your emotions are approximately it. they only never had the main remarkable lady, and probably that lady does not have the main remarkable guy. It is going the two techniques. you comprehend adult males mature plenty plenty plenty later than women people, whom in maximum circumstances have some consumer-friendly decency and don't continually have intercourse on their ideas. it is with the help of the fact their no longer adult males. No, you mustn't settle for that as time-honored prepare. it is authentic that adult males think of with 2 heads, yet virtually each and every guy has an appropriate. yet adult males are such dick heads frequently that they'll bounce in a lake if it seems that inviting sufficient. yet then this is directly to the subsequent lake. It has no longer something to do approximately being stable. maximum adult males assist you comprehend that they separate love and intercourse, and intercourse is somewhat like a sport. You play for a pair of hours have exciting and then flow homestead and bathe. this is a stressful cruel international accessible and adult males will take earnings of a woman lookin for a sprint convenience now and then.

Answer 4

Break up with her... your friend is right. If a 2 year relationship wasn't strong enough for her to stay faithful, why would a 3yr or 5yr or 10yr? Have sex with her, bust one on her face and then tell her you never want to see her again.

Answer 5

Maybe she truely is sorry and feels quilty and will not cheat again. She is the one who told you, you didn't find out. She was honest with you. If you feel that her honesty is to hard to forget then let her go, otherwise give her a chance and let her prove she is sorry.

Answer 6

YOUR FRIEND IS RIGHT. SORRY!!!!