This is long...but stay with me...I need advice!
My fiancee received a letter financial info for child support...The daughter lives with mom, he sees her 50% of the time. He provides half of whatever she needs (clothing,school stuff, etc.)
He gives mom $200 cash every month. (BAD idea...no proof) The mom just bought a housew/ her unemployed boyfriend. So now she wants support to help her make her house payments!!! She is also trying to backtrack for un-paid monies!
My fiancee makes little and supports his mother too.after bills, he only has 3-400 left a month and 200 goes to his daughter. If her request goes through..he will pay more...how will we survive!?!? If we get married because i'm afraid the mom will exploit us...(joint income..)
This makes me sick. Think about the mom's who are struggling unable to get support. This mom clubs daily & leaves the girl w/ grandma..ha! Grams should claim support! But what do we do??! we're in CA and mothers are always right here.....
2006-10-03 07:03:56 · 5 answers · asked by tc46 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
We're not looking to skip child support...we just don't want to go bankrupt...I know mothers need help..but what about the fathers??! Do we have to suffer and end up living in debt so she can enjoy her new big beautiful house and party with her employed boyfriend ( whom she supports>?!!?@)
And what kind of stress does this put on the child? She is often scared to speak up for her dad and goes by what the mom says...even though she knows its wrong...We tried to talk to the mom and ask her why she did this..but she just hangs up on us..we have no proof of anything...nevertheless money for a lawyer...
2006-10-03 07:08:24 · update #1
Oh..he gives the mom $200 on top of paying 50% of any expenses associated with the child...
$200 is really nothing to raise a child... :)
2006-10-03 07:18:23 · update #2
Please go to a lawyer. Tell him about the situation, she will ruin you uys if you let her. Child support money most be for the use of the mother and thire children. When these amounts are indicated, the judges use special formulas to make a "fair" distribution of the money. Tell your B friend to never pay cash. Some states have a system where the government take from the father account the amount of money that the state imposed over the father. This presisly helps to avoid those situations. If that program is not available, then pay by check, is the only way to keep a track of the given money. Another thing. The law is to protect the mother and the childern no matter wath, even if it means that the father have to go live under a bridge. What I mean is you and your B friend make sure to collect enough evidence to support your arguments because the court will give priority to mother and child, even when she has a B friend because the father responsibility is with the mother and child. Did he set an amount agreement with a court or a lawyer? I think thess laws are out of times. today most women work, I think formulas should consider mother progresive income to establish the child support amount. And also to stop mother exploiding theye exs just for make an upgrade of theyre standard of living.
I beleive a father should pay for all it's child support like food clothes, housing,education, and entertainmet in a balanced manner, but not to support the mother itself and the ambitions of some women who abuses of the law authority on theire side.
2006-10-03 07:44:39 · answer #1 · answered by 4-democracy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First you have to document everything including everything that he is paying for his daughter! Next because the courts are so unfair to fathers because there is no traceability on the mother's side so there is no way showing that the child support really goes for the child. My ex as soon as I filed for Divorce she told the court that she was leaving her full time job to work part time then when she got the temporary orders giving her physical custody she got child support within a week of getting child support she brought a brand new 4x4 truck with all the bells and whistles which equaled to my monthly child support payment. So I would know where my money was going and it wasn't to my child. Next she is now claiming that I am not working to my full potential and is hiring a "vocational expert" to tell the court that I'm not making enough money. I filed and I was debt free the house was paid for and no outstanding loans or credit cards and she has been living rent and mortgage free for the pass two years and still wants more. The system is broken and it needs to be fixed by assigning Shared Parenting with a parenting coordinator to stop the power struggle and allow the kids to love both parents equally.
2006-10-03 07:19:24 · answer #2 · answered by chancesare45 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
They are both not taking care of their adult responsibilities. It's a shame she is another woman taking advantage of irresponsibility....
He will have to keep receipts from now on, if he does not start paying according to a court order. Receipts are PROOF. (Not being unkind, being serious.) Anytime you guys pay someone, get or write up a receipt with the day and time on it. Keep bank statements.
$200 is not enough to take care of any child. Some people get by on way less, true, but if a man has means, he should pay what he can afford to see the child has a better way to become an adult.
The house technically is a part of taking care of a child, though frankly, the mother should be working her butt off too. They BOTH had the child and should take care of her together.
2006-10-03 07:10:38 · answer #3 · answered by *babydoll* 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Number one she cannot get any money from your wages. You have no obligation to support her children. So he could quit and you support him and do not have to pay his child support. He will only have to pay child support to mom and no longer have to buy clothes school supplies etc. except for what he wants kept at y'alls house. If he has and the year in visitation there should be no child support. Why doesn't he just get custody away from mom. If mom is only in it for the money. UGH I hate moms like that.
2006-10-03 07:15:05 · answer #4 · answered by Liz 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
!. what about suing for full custody?
2. always get reciepts,come on!
3. if you can show gross incompetence(i.e. grandma babysitting) get full custody.
4. demand reciepts that show monies being used for child care,not house payments.
2006-10-03 07:15:29 · answer #5 · answered by onelonevoice 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋