Important Question...(asked yesterday in parent section, now want to know what the rest of you think)?

Question

I notice a lot of questions on Yahoo Answers, from pre-teens, and early teens, asking about having sex at any age from 11-16 and so on, and asking if this is okay. Some of these questions are probably coming from people just trying to get a rise out of others; however, I do believe that some of these questions are legitimate questions from young children that really want to know about it. Although some of the times, the answers are from more mature people who discourage them from doing anything, some of the answers these children get are from people who are a lot of the times their peers or immature people, who encourage them to go for it. If I were a parent, I definitely would not want my child getting these answers. Do you feel that this is because they are not getting enough discussion from their parents about the issue of sex, and they don't feel comfortable asking them? What's the solution here? Stricter computer monitoring, or parents being more open about sex with them?

Answer 1

I think the parents need to de-mystify the idea of sex for their children by having lots of open and frank discussions about sex and sexuality. I know that my mother and I were both too embarrassed to discuss anything remotely sexual when I was growing up, her answer was always--"You should wait because it just complicates the relationship" I hope to be more up front and honest with my daughter as she begins to question sexuality. I am also a firm believer in strictly monitoring your children's activities on the computer. If you find your child asking these kinds of questions online, you should use it as an opener to discuss the issue and pass on your own views and advice, rather than letting them get it from strangers who don't have their best interests at heart.

Answer 2

So many of the children are left to their own devices due to the parents working late and perhaps coming from single parent households. They are raising themselves and they are too embarassed to ask a close personal relative and or maybe their parent because they don't want to bother them. Ideally,
the solution here is one that will not take place and one that is becoming a rare thing. It is a nuclear family. One in which the vows of marriage are taken seriously and withstands all obstacles. I would like it if their was someone available at the schools that could actually have an office and where kids could go and get whatever answers they needed in a professional, caring and confidential way. While I am not advocating a planned parenthood in the school system; I am referring to someone on staff like a psychologist etc...
That would provide problems too. The parents within the Bible belt who won't talk to their own children about the various pressures facing their children today will fight and refuse consent for their kids to have access to such a service. It is a vicious cycle and a losing battle. I therefore take some solace in the hope that maybe I will say the right thing to a real teen that may help them.
I educate my own children and have an open line of communication with them while not pretending to be their buddy. I am their parent and they recognize this. I strive to help them develop confidence in themselves so as not to look for validation thru drugs and sex. I also keep the computer in a central location where it can be viewed from any angle. It isn't at all easy and poses challenges every day; yet I continue on. Sometimes when answering a teen question I will ask them to answer it and it is very enlightening to see if my lessons have gotten thru. Answers is a good place for opinions and would be far better served by those who gave serious ones no matter how diverse. At least the teen could get an average opinion but when people vent their hostilities, name call, or make light of the very real questions it gives testimony to the situation of our confused teens today. Where do they turn for answers that will truly benefit them and their need?

Answer 3

BOTH, Stricter computer monitoring and parents need to be more open with their kids..I agree some of the questions are really young teens wanting opinions that are not to be asked on this site..It's impossible to really know their ages and they could say their 18 but only be 8..It's really a dangerous site Y&A for children to be on..Not only to ask questions but to read some of the answers people give to questions..I fault the parents they need to keep a better eye on their kids and know who and what their doing on the internet..A lot of child molesters out there and the parents wonder how their child was molested..They need to know what sites their children are on..Can't blame the child..

Answer 4

The real truth is the way that we deal with sex and relatinoships in our present culture is problematic and has become outdated.

There is really only one non belief based reason to not have sex and that is AIDS. The truth about STD's is that they can either be protected against, cured or managed. This means that even for an uncurable disease such as herpes, symptoms can be become practically nonexistent. Although none of this is 100%, the fact that the odds of safety reside in the high 90's means that the safety factor may as well be 100% in the minds of adolescents.

The idea that sexually mature people will not engage in sexual activity is not valid. Also, our culture is beginning to accept the idea that mature/consensual adults can engage in various "casual" sexual behaviors and not have it be a big issue.

Adolescents need to be given the truth about sexual behaviors and all the different ramifications that come from those behaviors. At the same time they need to be given experience in making good decisions and see that modeled by responsible adults.

Answer 5

honesty, maturity, and openess on the part of the parents and the teen would be an ideal situation. Unfortunaly the media is way out there in sending messages to our youth and socity is way to accepting of some of these things. We as parents are not going to be the only influence in our chidrens lives, so we need to make it a pointe to be the strongest influence and start this at an early age. I also think that parents have to watch that 'do as i say not as i do ' thing. Actions speak louder that words and when the parents set the example, teens see this and listen more to that then the talking. Do not be afraid to ask questions and talk to your child, if you cannot (as a parent) talk to your child/teen about everyday stuff, do you really think when it comes to the improtant stuff that they will come to you, or listen when you come to them? Establish a rutine of communication on a daily basis and don't leave out the small stuff, or the big stuff. Be a consistant part of your childs life, you may get slack, but just because they say or act like they are not listening, I will bet that their ears are still working and that they are hearing you and what you say. Keep yourself avaliable to your child/teen, let them know that you are hear to talk to them or just to listen whenever and for what ever reason, and when they come to you......STOP what you are doing and hear them. You may be suprised to hear what they have to say and they may be suprised as well.

Answer 6

Parents being more open with them about sex, and passing on the values and principles of the parents. Computer monitoring is also of utmost importance. Remember, training of children is not here a little, there a little. It is day in and day out all during the day, as the opportunity presents itself and also making time to share. It is as you are leaving the house and as you are returning. A little like boot camp.

Answer 7

Truthfully there would be no need to be stricter with the computer if the parents talked to them. I know all my parents ever said to me was "keep your legs shut" but that is not very effective. I learned alot about what i know about sex (sexual reproduction, organs, pill,ect...) at school and i think its ashame that school aren't offering the sex edu. as before. Parents Don't know what to say to their children about sex and i think its important that they at least try.

you right there are legit. question here form teens for sex but where else are they suppose to turn? and then they have older people answering the exact things their parents are insinuating or telling them ("keeep you legs shut")

I don't think parents understand that sexula curiosity starts at a very young age now and they really need to talk to their children at age 11/12 because by 16 its pretty much to late fotr the sex talk because teenager are know it alls and they won't listen.

maybe they should have courses or pamphlets for parents to learn from on how to talk to their children about this subject.

hope that helped

Answer 8

Look you idiots, Sex has obviously been around and we've all done it. Is it right for an 11yr old? Not your call but we can all give our advice and opinion. Now if that child is dumb enough to take the advice from a stranger than their own parent, guess who failed? THE PARENT! Other time they just want an opinion. I do hope EVERYONE is smart enought to weed out what's good advice and what's bad here and or talk to someone real and close to them before going forward with any decision in life.
Note to ALL:
DON'T BE A MORON!!!!
ULTIMATELY THE DECISION IS YOUR TO MAKE- MAKE THE BEST CHOICE!!!!

Answer 9

i don't understand what spawned this rant, yet ok. human beings tend to generalize if that's what you mean. My final house that I stay in conventional section 8 and it became into the worst adventure ever. My pals have been all scumbags & each and every had 3 or 4 young ones. I had to call the law enforcement officers each and every few days over somebody beating somebody else. each and every of the collectively as i became into paying $1600/mo finished lease for the exhilaration of residing around people who behaved as though they have been interior the initiatives or some thing. So, yeah. according to probability human beings get the incorrect effect. There are continually exceptions to a rule & understand that. for my area, i like to work out classes that help get human beings back on their ft. i'm a qualified hairstylist so I volunteer to help abused women prepare to discover jobs. They get a unfastened occupation cloth wardrobe it is donated, they get classes on skills they are able to apply, and that i (alongside w/ numerous others) decrease & form their hair, there are makeup artists additionally. it is precious to me because of the fact i realize it rather is a fashion of helping them to circulate better, not basically survive government help.

Answer 10

My parents were always open and honest. I never had to look elsewhere for answers, the kids on here are ridiculous and obviously their parents have no control or they would realize what's going on. I would hope in the future mine will ask me but some kids on here think they are funny so they ask questions to see what people will say.