I am trying to get a general overview of how many sexual active people wish they would have waited longer before "giving it up". I want some concrete #s to share with a youth group. A simple yes or no is good but I REALLY would appriciate knowing why you wished you'd waited. Thanks everyone.
2006-10-03 04:26:55 · 31 answers · asked by Marissa J 1 in Social Science ➔ Sociology
Well, do you mind if it's from the other end of the spectrum?
I did wait, (agonizingly at times!) 20.5 years, to my wedding night and it was one of the most incredible experiences I've ever had....(painful I'll admit! lol) but the emotions, sharing, connection, and memories will be forever among my most cherished because it was with my husband.
I think the best thing young people today can do is to wait until they are at least 18, or older! You mature so much as years go by and things deepen in meaning and are easier to handle than when you are in your young teens.
Good luck on your study!
2006-10-03 04:38:12 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I first made love when I was nearly 16. Can't say I regretted it at any point--I was with that young man until I was nearly 20, and we were responsible about birth control (STDs weren't such an issue in the 1970s) from the start.
I never felt "devalued," either by him or by later lovers, for not being a virgin. Mind you, in those days, at least in the large city I lived in, very few young people (at least among those I ever met) were into "saving themselves" for marriage. Under different cultural circumstances, then or now, I might well make a different choice.
One thing I can say is that I didn't *enjoy* sex at that age nearly as much as I did later on. Not sure, though, whether that shifted due to my own increased maturity (because, for example, I eventually learned to ask for what gave me the most pleasure--and then to accept it for as long as I needed to) or due to the increased maturity/knowledge/experience of the men in question. I never had what I'd consider good sex with anyone younger than about 25. And most women I've discussed this with, of whatever age, seem to have had similar experiences. Not that an "older" man is automatically a better lover; just that the odds of his being better seem to increase, perhaps because the odds of his having had a certain amount of experience increase.
2006-10-03 08:21:02 · answer #2 · answered by tink_mcd 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can honestly say that I don't regret it. Chances are he and I won't be together forever, but it's an experience to be had, for sure. I've waited long enough, I know what I want and don't want, and I feel as though I am mature enough to know any emotional consequences or complications.
He even stopped and asked if it was really what I wanted before it happened. He is my first, and I'm not sleeping around with other guys or anything. I wouldn't think of myself as being promiscuous, because he is my first and only...it's unfortunate that western society has the gender roles and expectations that it does, because it really makes women feel ashamed to lose their virginity before marriage. If anything, I'm happy to have at least SOME experience before being married...I'll have a fairly decent idea of what a man wants, and this way we can both enjoy it (instead of him enjoying it and me being in pain).
2006-10-03 20:22:34 · answer #3 · answered by exo_politician 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was 16 when I "gave it up" as you put it and I wish I would have waited. I have since discovered that I am worth waiting for...that comes with a lot of wisdom and knowing yourself. The guy I was with as many girls can attest to said all of the things that a young girl wants to hear. He wasn't worth it and I lost a part of myself to someone who didn't even come close to deserving that honor. I hope your study goes well and that the feedback you get will help young teens be better prepared for what life throws at them, and that they will consider what they are giving up before they do. I was always mature for my age...even then, but it's so much better to wait until you really know the other person, as well as yourself. Good Luck
2006-10-03 04:39:01 · answer #4 · answered by Carrie H 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, I wish I had waited because it wasn't worth it. I lost my virginity at 18 and got pregnant shortly after. I would never take back my son, ever, but it wasn't a good time. I was supposed to go to college and get a degree and ended up not going and my husband went into the army and is overseas and we don't have the money to spend on college. Plus, I have to think back at the guys that I slept with and how it wasn't worth giving it up before I got married.
2006-10-03 04:38:19 · answer #5 · answered by beautifulsweetheart20 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I particularly have been with my boyfriend for 2 years now(in view that March 27 2009) and that i'm virtually 17. So confident, i wish i could have waited a speedy time longer. yet now, I dont experience sorry relating to the guy in any respect. we are nonetheless mutually and with any luck would be for a protracted time.
2016-10-18 10:08:33 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wish that I would have waited. I think I was 15 or 16. The reason.........(looking back) there was no need to do it. My life is not any better for doing it. Once I did, other boys thought that they could ask me out and then I would put out (that did not happen), but it still didn't stop them from asking.
2006-10-03 05:14:42 · answer #7 · answered by NolaDawn 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I wish I would have waited. I lost it at 16. to a guy of all things. And I didn't have my first experience with a woman until I was 19. I think I could have skipped a lot of BS, if I would have just been more confident in myself. And trusted my own feelings, waited awhile, until college, and just dated women exclusively.
2006-10-03 10:01:18 · answer #8 · answered by lesbianmommy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I Lost It At The Aqe Of 16 && I Waited 2 Yrs Before "Givin It Up" Just To Make Sure He Was There For Me && NOT For The Sex. We Are Still Togther. ;]
2006-10-03 04:38:47 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I wish I had waited. I was 16 and the guy was a loser. He used me. Now I am 33 and I realize how special it could have been with the right person.
2006-10-03 11:05:18 · answer #10 · answered by ♥ terry g ♥ 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋