How do you pick up girls? am not good with words.?

Question

I was just wondering what you girls say to other girls when trying to get a date. I am not good with words at all. I can't just put things together to make them sound right I guess. What do you ladies say to someone you are trying to get with. And also, what do you say to them to find out if they are lesbian or not without actually saying "are you gay". Please help. There are lots of girls at my college that I want to get with but just don't know how.

Answer 1

Advice from Hersband,

Well, I have to tell you when I went to college I had just come out. I realized it was hard to see a lesbian woman. First of all everyone was being like a hippie. So everyone looked alike. For a period gays and lesbians developed a certain haircut and way of dressing so you could identify each other. But now, it seems that everyone is merging looks and clothing again. Or I should say piercing and tattoos. Who is gay and who is not gay?? That would be the question. What I found helped was finding out if there was a gay/lesbian center on campus. Now it maybe a gay/lesbian/bi-sexual/transgendered center. This type of organization will have a lot of activities to get people together. There may even be monthly dances on campus. You certainly will find many women involved here and most of them will be lesbian. If there is no such organization on campus then look for a local coffee house or campus book store. Someplace you may find where there are a lot of people where you can just sit and observe until you feel more comfortable. When you frequent enough you get to know the locals. I have always found just saying "hello" to people and try to start a simple honest conversation. I look for the signs if I just bothered them or they do not want to talk to me. I never use a come on line cause everyone hates those. I have met the most interesting people in the strangest places by asking them a question or over hearing their conversation and interjecting in a comment. I found if you have a sense of humor you will get more people to talk back. Once you have a conversation going feel things out. By this I mean, ask where they hang out. What types of places and things are enjoyment. Do your homework. Find out what and where the gay places are so if names are dropped most likely you just found another gay person. Once you find someone to hang out with, be open minded and try new stuff. I think soon you will find some friends who have friends and open up your world to discovering all sorts of things in college and gay life.

And so, I always think these are good butch perspectives,
Hersband


Advice from Wife,
This question couldn’t have come at a better time, considering that this morning I was discussing with Hersband that this month (October) was not only Breast Cancer Awareness Month but it was also GLBT History month and then she informed me that on October 11th it was National Coming Out day. Go figure a day just to jump up and down and say HEY WORLD IM GAY!!! Not like straight people have a day for that. (it is called the day they are born. ) Anyway I got a little off topic for a second.
What I was actually getting at was since you are on a college campus, you should have GLBT groups that meet and maybe they are planning something for the month of October since it is GLBT History Month. And since the 11th is National Coming Out Day maybe they have something specific planned for that day. Who knows maybe you could get involved in a GLBT group on campus and if you are not already “Out and proud” you can be and that will get you noticed by these girls you are interested in. But if it doesn’t or if they are not gay believe me you don’t want to mess with them as getting involved with a straight girl is messing with trouble all the way around. It will just set you up for heart ache.
The other option for you is to start going to your local “lipstick bar” (lesbian bar) or gay bar but be careful there as many “fag hags “ go there because they have the idea it is safe for them there because (as I have heard before from my straight friends) “we can go there as women and the guys don’t treat us like a piece of meat and we can have a good time with our friends” what they don’t take in to account is that not only men are gay, women are gay as well that is why they call us LESBIANS! So you have to have a sort of semi good gaydar even at the gay bar because the straight girls love the gay bar as well. At least there if you hit on one you can say “hey you are in a gay bar what did you expect?” and get away with it without feeling so embarrassed.
If you have a local lesbian bar that is your best bet for a place to hang out, I’m not advocating the bar scene but unfortunately because of the social environment we live in it is a starting point for we girls, just because you are in a bar does not mean you have to drink alcoholic drinks, many times when I am in a bar environment I drink water bottles. (thou I do love my Apple hoopties and Jaeger bombs) We have a local lesbian bar were we live that Hersband and I like to go to that is very small and cozy called Lipstick the owners run it like a house party so it doesn’t feel so much like a meat market, it feels more like you are going into their living room every night and hanging out with friends.

If you put yourself out there and start finding a social circle of lesbian friends, lesbian environments, and a few gay men friends for spice it up you will soon find a lesbian date, it is that simple.

That is just my humble opinion as a femme,
Wife

Answer 2

From what I hear a lot of lesbians do volunteer work. Try planned parenthood and various feminist groups. Many feminists are bi or lesbian. Also try the clubs and bars, but they take better skills at starting conversations with people. People often go to bars and clubs in groups. It can be intimidating to start a conversation with someone. If you find someone that you're interested in, start a conversation about anything with them. If you want to take the relationship beyond frineds, then say so and hope for the best. Many women that I meet at work tell me in conversation that they're bi or lesbian in conversations months after I first met them at work.

Answer 3

Just bring it up in a conversation if they react hateful you will know the anwser,i am not good at talking but will make compliments and touch her on the arm,always leave the opportunity for her to make a move!

Answer 4

I would have to agree with herband and wife... you need to first find someone who you know is gay and make friends... Then you will meet who they know is gay and so on... then once you find one you are attracted too.... work it from there by being your self.... women are not into pick up lines... That is for the str8ght guy... Shhhh don't tell them it is pathetic...

Answer 5

Well dear, go to a gay bar in a short skirt and flash your pants...that should do it

Dorothy Mills (Mrs)

Answer 6

It all depends on the type of person they seem to be.

Answer 7

go to a bar, get drunk, find another drunk, make out

Answer 8

First ask them if your an idiot.