is it necessary to shut out the painful past, to live happily in the present?

Question

i've tried but the past keeps intruding into my present....

Answer 1

I tried that, and couldn't do it. I'm not a psychologist, but I always heard that what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. I still kinda believe that because I lived through some seriously awful stuff as a young person, and considering all things, I'm a pretty strong mama. :)

Happiness, to me, is the most important thing in the world, and there are a lot of ingredients to happiness - none of them being money. (Although if you don't have money, you have the stress of the bill-paying stuff) It's mostly to do with how you live, who you love, and how seriously you take everything.

Good luck to you, my friend.

Answer 2

Stuffing the past never helps. It will come out in one way or another, either now or in the future.

Facing the pain of the past and going through that pain and learning from it can help you go into the future.

If it's interfering with your life you might want to consider counselling of some sort so that you have someone to help you work through it in a safe environment.

The painful parts of all our pasts intrude at times. It's what we do with it that matters. If we hide from it and try to stuff it then it kind of undermines our ability to mature and to deal with life.

If we accept it (not that it was good, but that we can derive good from it) then we can use it to help us in our relationship with our self and others. It's not an easy process, but it's better than stumbling over the same stone every day.

Answer 3

Analogy. A young man was burnt on the chest through pulling a hot cup of tea off the table as a small child.
He is scarred .
During the winter months he isn't much aware of them because he is covered.
Summer arrives and he goes to the beach his scar is uncovered and he is reminded of the painful incident.
We will always have our scars most of the time we get on with the business of daily living and are not aware of them until an incident occurs which is a reminder and the old pain rears its ugly head.
We just need to remind ourselves that it is over it has gone, it is a part of our past and cannot harm us anymore!!.
Why let it spoil the precious present.
Proverbs17:22 A joyful heart is good medicine,but a broken spirit dries up the bones.
Take care!

Answer 4

in order to live happily in the present and future, you must deal with your painful past. As hard as you try, you cannot bury the past, 'because the past always claws its way out'.
It may seem that shutting something out is the best option, but it is important to come to terms with things that trouble you, because otherwise they can intrude at anytime.

Answer 5

I once read in Bible which meant something like if you take all your sorrows and pains as a cross of God which was given to you to bear bcoz your shoulders were strong enough then it will be a source of joy .
So, do that . Accept your past as a blessing . Face it with full confidence . To err is human . Dont feel bad/ashamed abt anything . Make sure you learn from your mistakes & dont repeat them in the present to have a bright future . Dont be guilt coscious and dont consider urself any lesser .

Answer 6

No all of your experiences are part of what you are today be they good or bad past or present, you need these to make the future better learning what you can from them and selecting the things that will be useful, eventually you will be able to lock the bad ones away from intruding, but I doubt they will go altogether, use them as stepping stones on your journey to happiness and fulfilment

Answer 7

It is absolutely necessary to forget the painful past. or else it will ruin your present. If you can live happily at present, then why not.

Just think over your mind why it is intruding into your present. You will overcome this with understanding the mind.

Answer 8

The poet and philosopher George Santayana: addressed this issue long ago with his sapient remark, "Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it." This is true for individuals as well as for societies. Our mistakes can be great teachers and the painful lessons of the past must remain with us at some level so we don't repeat them. Otherwise our lives would just spin round and round on the Ferris wheel of Karma, that is to say,much motion going nowhere.

Answer 9

Remember if you changed anything in your past, you may not be where you are today. So if you are happy today, you had to travel down the bumpy road of life to get there. It is okay to remember the past, but don't allow it to ruin your present or future. Seek help if you are unable to do this on your own. Good luck.

Answer 10

It is your past and you may never be able to completely shut it out. All you can do is learn from whatever happend and move forward and know that all things happen for a reason. If it is truly hurting you and you are having a hard time moving forward, you may want to try counseling..