Do rape victims either become sexualy intravorted or overly promiscuious? I was raped before 3 weeks before my 15 b-day and ever since than I felt that sex was the only thing I was good for. That was my way of sort of coping with the pain and hurt.What's wrong with me?
2006-10-03 00:31:49 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
That is not an uncommon response to being raped. Often after such an attack women will lose some sense of their own worth and become throw themselves into sexual activity either becasue they are no longer able to see themselves as having any other merit, or sometimes in an effort to find someone that will make them feel good aobut their sexuality. Also, that sort of reaction becomes a way to attempt to regain control of their sexuality by choosing such partnes for themselves as they want. Of course these things become more of a way of hiding from the pain than from learning to deal with it. And all too often the partners that are chosen are not such partners as are any good for the person to beigin with. Counciling is really the best way to go in such situations and truly regain that sense of self and control over your own life that the rapist stole. I spent several summers voluteering at a rape counciling center so I have some limited experience with this.
2006-10-03 01:08:25 · answer #1 · answered by kveldulfgondlir 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's nothing "wrong" with you. That was your way of dealing with what happened to you. Just understand that you are good for a lot more than just sex and you have a lot more to offer to men than your body. I have dealt with numerous teenage girls who were the victims of rape or sexual abuse, and I can tell you from experience that some girls become sexually introverted (or completely introverted -- it's common for a girl who is the victim of sexual abuse to make herself as "ugly" as possible so her abuser will leave her alone) and some girls become sexually promiscuous. If you still feel that sex is the only thing you are good for, you should see a psychologist or a therapist so you can get help dealing with your past. You can't just "let it go;" you have to deal with it or it'll affect you for the rest of your life.
2006-10-03 07:40:48 · answer #2 · answered by sarge927 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is no stereotype for a rape victim....a lot depends on what kind of intervention, if any, you had at the time. Did you go to counselling? If you didnt and you are having problems with your identity, then you need to go to counselling. There is nothing wrong with you, your are reacting quite normally to a devestating experience. Rape is not about sex...it is about power. The person/people who raped you got their kicks because they forced you to do something you wouldnt have normally done without pressure. Of course you would feel only good for sex because rape degrade a girl so much that you very rarely feel good about yourself. A lot of rape victims will blame themselves, thinking they could have stopped it. A lot of rape victims think they encouraged the rapist. None of it is true. I was raped when I was 19 I had all the feelings you are having...I felt totally worthless. I read lots and lots of books about people who have been raped and how they coped. I kinda counselled myself. What you have to do is put what happened to you into perspective. You were the victim.....you had no control over what happened to you. You have to tell yourself every single day that the person/people who raped you are very sick people....well I wouldnt even call them people, they are nothing but low dogs. Why are you putting yourself through this....It was not your fault...keep on telling yourself that until it finally sinks in. I had to do a lot of soul searching and I learnt a lot about myself...I learnt I was a very strong intelligent human being. I rose above my rape...I have a very healthy attitude towards sex. I certainly do not feel sex is bad...I enjoy sex. I do not sleep around, but I am pretty broadminded in the bedroom. If I allowed what the rapists forced upon me to eat me up inside, then I probably would be really hung up about sex by now.
You need intervention. You need help. Are there any Rape Crisis Centre's in your area. You are not alone in your feelings and getting in contact with a Rape Crisis Centre, or even a sexual assault counsellor you will see that you really were the victim. Victim is not just a word...it has a meaning. Look up what the word means in your dictionary...but more than just read it, believe it. You are a worthwhile wonderful person....its the rapists who are sick....they will get theirs one day...what goes around comes around. You just have to know you were not to blame. Go get some help, you obviously need it. You wont always feel this way, but you really have to put what happened to you into perspective. Not all men are rapists...there are some wonderful men out there who will love and nurture you. What you have to stop doing right this moment is to stop being so hard on yourself. You are blaming yourself for something you had no control over. I know I am sounding like a broken record, but this is what you have to say to yourself over and over again...It was not your fault...no ifs or buts....it was not your fault.
2006-10-03 07:54:21 · answer #3 · answered by rightio 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You need to get into a support group for women who have been raped. The kind of communication in those groups sheds all kinds of new light on your experiences since.
2006-10-03 07:37:18 · answer #4 · answered by beast 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
its OK I have been raped too 4 years ago I tried to get over it but it not easy its in dreams in reality it control ed my life but I found good friends who helped a lot , you need to get support
2006-10-03 07:45:17 · answer #5 · answered by Janet 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋