Some girls and I were talking about whether it's ok to have sex with someone other than your future spouse before the wedding--a last chance, no-strings-attached fling before you're officially Not Single. Should/could you have a one night stand? If you do, should you tell your partner?
I'm not looking for condemnation or commendation, I'm looking for thoughts, opinions and insights. Serious answers only please.
2006-10-02 17:51:27 · 45 answers · asked by Bachman-ette 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I am not, nor have I ever, planning on cheating on my man. I love him. My friend said that people agreed with her and that you should go out and do it, but I disagreed and wanted to know what people thought. That's all.
And I am a GIRL.
2006-10-02 19:04:23 · update #1
No a one night stand before the wedding is NOT okay. You are not single if you are getting married the next day. If you are dating you are not single. If you have to sleep with another man the night before the wedding, you aren't ready for the commitment that marriage demands. When they propose to you and you accept, you agree to remain faithful to only them from that day forward.
2006-10-02 17:56:00 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's wrong I'm engaged and I don't consider myself single as soon as I said "yes", I was committed to him and no longer single so for you to consider yourself single means you probably shouldn't get married! I would be F***ing devastated if my fiance' just said he was single or not in a committed relationship! I'm sorry I was just judging you there, wasn't I!? I'm sorry I'm just so passionate about the engaged versus married argument, I've had this one with a very good friend of mine since I've been engaged! I just think it's wrong and a bad way to start a marriage. I believe thoughts like that are just cold feet getting the best of some people, I've been getting calls from old flames and when the temptation comes I just think about how much better the sex is with my fiance' and ask remind myself why I'm not with the other guys and as for strangers I think of the same thing and think why would I want to give up a sure thing that's gonna be mine forever for something that will possibly suck and lose my sure thing maybe forever! You get what I'm saying and why I'm so passionate about this subject! Great Question By the way!! I bet lots of people are thinking about this one!!
2006-10-02 18:08:08 · answer #2 · answered by EriksSweetheart 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I personally would think that if you were taking such a big step of commitment as marriage, then a one night stand would be out of the question. If you are getting married, then you have found the one person that you want to spend the rest of your life with. If that is the case then a one night stand wouldn't even cross your mind. If there are any doubts or considerations of that kind, then the marriage should really be reconsidered. Of course, this is just my opinion. But If I knew that my fiance had slept with someone, no matter who, the night before our wedding, I would have serious doubts as to whether he is the man for me.
I am curious as to what your opinion is on this? I have never known any one who wouldn't be opposed to this, what are your thoughts?
2006-10-02 17:59:15 · answer #3 · answered by short n sweet 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That bride would desire to be banned from ever internet hosting yet another journey! ensure you do in no way attend a baby bathe for her, she might in all likelihood have cake and snacks and invite a pair human beings for in simple terms the present beginning, lol. I went to a minimum of one wedding ceremony that the couple could not discover the money for to feed each and every physique, so in simple terms instantaneous kin and the bridal party had a fabulous sit down dinner. Then afterwards, something of the kin individuals and friends have been invited to a fabulous reception. yet there have been 2 hours in between to sparkling the tables, and re-manage for a dance. The reception became into nicely after typical eating hours and not something became into written interior the invitation some dinner. And the cake wasn't decrease until eventually each and every physique became into there.
2016-10-15 11:18:41 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would never do that to my potential wife. if i found out she did it to me i would divorce her, even if im like 60. if you do it, you should tell your partner if you want an honest relationship. Lies come back to haunt you in the worst ways. It may be forgiven, but the kind of man that forgives that kind of thing is a man that is not one of the most super-confident elite of the world. He's a compromiser. And so his wife will eventaully get bored of him and cheat on him anyway (if she still is attractive/desirable enough to do so). It depends on the values of the man and the woman. Two sexually open minded people it may work for. But a sexual person and one who has perhaps had many partners, but isnt into the whole multiple partners/swinging/watching you partner sleep with someone else, wouldnt work for that relationship. Marriages between peopole of similar values last. Not viewpoints. You can believe in different stuff, but the values have to match. Thats why only two sexually open minded people can have that be disclosed in the future and the relationship may still work out.
2006-10-02 17:59:17 · answer #5 · answered by lucas m 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I think it would be a poor reflection on the person doing it, if being engaged isnt enough commitment why would getting married change anything. Either your monogamous or your not...if your engaged youve already given your word to that person in my opinion that your only with them. Also if your having second thoughts of this nature id consider it a much deeper issue, are you sure this is the one guy, clearly part of you isn't. I know when i was engaged no other guys even existed on my radar, but im sorta strange. Most of my girlfriends would say go for it, if you can get away with it.. I am always the one saying think of the consequences.
2006-10-02 17:56:33 · answer #6 · answered by Wylde Woman 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
IF you still want that one last fling, then I'd say you probably wont be faithful to whom you are gonna marry. Your gonna always want that extra other sex.. with someone you arent tied to.
The thing is would you want your fiance to have sex with some other chick before he was gonna marry you?? Would you want him to do it??
Me personally .. I couldnt have sex with someone I didnt know, much less may or may not even LIKE.. just so I could have that one last fling. IF I was even CONSIDERING Fukking another guy when I was a day away from saying my vows then I would just have to break it off and tell him I wasnt ready. I would see it as cheating on him and if he done the same thing or even thought about it I wouldnt ever trust him. I would always feel like he was looking for someone else.. Someone to give him a fling..
2006-10-02 18:08:44 · answer #7 · answered by Shalamar Rue 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No its not ok, if you are getting married then you must really love your partner, why would you fuc*k someone else for the sake of it. If he found out then he would feel sick looking at how you betrayed him. I mean, what if you go to a bar, pick up the hottest guy you can find and he is so WOW and good that you wish that you could have him all the time, because your fiances wang isnt as big, you will not be satisfied during your marriage and it will crumble to pieces
2006-10-02 17:54:53 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would have to say having a one night stand is wrong. If it was wrong while you were dating, why would it be OK now that you've supposedly decided you love this person enough to want to share your life with them? What would having the one nighter accomplish anyway. So you slept with one more person. The last stranger you'll ever have now that your married. Is it that important. I don't understand what reward you get for doing it. Shouldn't you be trying to figure out ways to help your future marriage instead of ways to destroy it? If you feel like you must sleep with one more person before you take "the plunge", I don't think you're ready to get married. If you feel trapped before you even get started why start? Stay single and live life the way you want to. Don't make a promise you can't fulfill.
2006-10-02 18:04:15 · answer #9 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think you shouldn't, because you would be cheating on your
fiance or fiancee, and if that person finds out, that could lead to
the wedding being postponed, or even cancelled. It could ruin the
relationship. One night stands are fine for people who are single
and available, for those couples who allow their partner to roam
free, but for those couples who are committed to each other, this
is not a good idea. If your fiance/fiancee is cool with the idea, that's one thing, and go for it. If that person isn't, take the hint, and don't do it. It depends totally of what the mindset of the person you are going to marry would think about this situation.
2006-10-02 18:01:01 · answer #10 · answered by Answerer17 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋