A girl I've loved for a long time is suddenly too busy to spend any real time with me anymore. She insists that there's no other guys, but that she needs time to get her life and her home in order. But she still finds time to party and go out with friends as she tells me she too busy with her life. She wants to be my friend, and says she can't show me or give me any love right now, but she wants me to understand and still be there for her. I am finding it extremely difficult to deal with unrequited and unanswered love and I am miserable and in despair. She won't listen to reason, takes me for granted and thinks I can't leave her. I have threatened to end it completely, but she responds negatively and doesn't think I will. I think I should let go and move on; how should I do it? How can I do it? I love her deeply. Is there anyway to get through to her to make her see that she's really losing me? What should I do? Thanks in advance for your input.
2006-10-02 16:46:15 · 16 answers · asked by §üߧë7ëñ.6 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
if she "thinks" she has u wrapped she'll keep doing this. try ignoring her for a change and see how she likes it.
2006-10-02 17:32:32 · answer #1 · answered by imasmartass 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Something is troubling her.
And whatever it is, is troubling you.
There doesn't seem to be any solid ground right now.
No concrete meaning to it all.
I get the feeling she may not feel completely safe about being completely honest about her feelings. She may feel a certain way, but not be able to express it because she is not sure of how you will respond.
Sounds like she wants to keep you hanging on, (just in case) this rest period she needs does not work out and she changes her mind.
You need to get to the bottom of this.
You need to sit her down and let her know you won't be upset with her, but she has to share what is deep within her heart and what she truly wants.
She already knows what you want, you need to hear her out, free of any judgement on her, tell her that, get her to talk.
Your in the dark and it's to painful for you to let her carrying on this way.
Your love for her is not a game for her to being playing with.
You may need to start somewhere to show her that you mean what you say. You need to be strong and firm and stick to what your needs are, and what your willing to live with.
You can start by changing your phone number. If that is not good.
Don't answer her calls for awhile. Get her thinking about you instead of her party time.
If you live together, you go out for awhile, just when you know she is coming home.
Get her to wonder about you, and that she could be losing you.
I wish you the best of luck.
Take care of your heart.
2006-10-02 17:03:58 · answer #2 · answered by sweetcitywoman2002 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont blow it with a big "angry" type of leaving. Just be supportive. Tell her if she has to go and do other things, that you cant just sit back and live a miserable life, hoping that she changes her mind. Wish her luck, and tell her if she ever decides you are the right one, she will know where to find you. "If she doesnt wait too long". If you constantly give into her, it will be too easy, and she will inevitably wonder, "if he was that easy, what could i get if i tried"
2006-10-02 16:50:38 · answer #3 · answered by Aaron S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to get space from this. She's in total control right now and it's not healthy for you. This moment you sound desparate, she knows she has you in the palm of your hand. You can't control her, but you can control yourself. At least do nothing. Hang out with your friends, anything to gain some type of control back. I know you want to work things out, but your threats are empty without any action. For her to take you seriously you have to be decisive. Girls dont respect guys that are not decisive.
2006-10-02 17:07:17 · answer #4 · answered by Confused 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bah humbug buddy, move on move on. She isn't going to "answer your love" and she may just be hoping you'll take the hint and go on your way.
End it completely as in death, suicide, ???? That's just silly.What a control freak thing to do....tell someone you are going to kill yourself just to have your way.
Grow up, get a life, make some friends. Be nice to people you meet, be thoughtful, go out and do things you enjoy doing and meet people who are doing the same thing.
Drama is way over rated, normal every day living-that's a gas!
2006-10-02 16:52:26 · answer #5 · answered by hoodoowoman 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She might be scared. Love is a scary thing. Insted of trying to work things out with you, she is in denial and would rather pretend that evreything is fine. I think you should sit down and talk with her. Tell her everything about how you feel. If she is still unresponsive, end the relationship. Once she sees that you really carry through with it, she might come back to you. I hope everything works out for you.
2006-10-02 16:50:47 · answer #6 · answered by Sporty C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey buddy, remember that old cliche, "there's more fish in the ocean?" Yep, let her go, man. I thought a girl was the only one for me and I could never live without her. But, guess what? I started going out and having fun a little at a time, and bingo! I found another sweetie!!
2006-10-02 16:57:15 · answer #7 · answered by ynot 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate to say this but maybe she's moved on so u know what you show her the unexpected and you move on.The best way to do people like that is to stop "cold turkey".U sound like a great catch but your running behind her and sounds like she's being totally honest so again pay her no attention because she doesnt deserve it and stop doing what she expects you to do.She sounds like a real b*tch.Sorry but I hate to see people good people being treated like crap.Life aint fare but you own you meaning you have control over you.So again leave the ungreatful hoe alone.Good Luck
2006-10-02 16:53:58 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are allowing her to do this. Whether you know it or not, you have sent her the message that it's ok for her to act this way and you will be there waiting for her. You need to just lay it on the line and tell her to tell you what she wants. Stay firm and if she doesn't change, it's time to leave.
2006-10-02 16:49:42 · answer #9 · answered by ♥dream_angel♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just leave her let her be she is just enjoying her own space...maybe you don't do fun things with her and if she leaves off her friends when you realize this is not not love you have for and you are gone she'll be left alone ...give her some room she'll be back if she really is for you.
2006-10-02 16:51:50 · answer #10 · answered by Mersani 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have to be honest with you> She is really trying to let you down easy. She clearly is a nice girl and doesn't want to hurt your feelings but she is sick of you.
Also> It's really nice having someone that likes you the way you like her... so you are helping her ego and this is why she still wants you there.
Get awaY! You'll get hurt!
2006-10-02 16:50:46 · answer #11 · answered by idontknowsquat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋