It's been 11 months since I started seeing this guy. In the meantime, we've had a couple short "breaks". The thing is, I've known he was pretty jealous from the beginning, but this time around is way different. He doesn't want me talking to guys (not even my old guy friends who I've known for years), doesn't want me wearing certain things, always has to have the last word, pretty much makes the decisions about having a kid, etc. I know for a fact that he's pretty insecure, but it's like his "love" is suffocating me lately. The other day we had a talk about kids and stuff, and he says I'm gonna have his kid no matter what I say, one way or another, blah blah blah. When things don't go his way, he ignores me and tells me I got him out of a good mood. I don't wanna lose him, but somehow I think his behavior is making me push him away. Nothing's really equal either. He has chick friends but orders my guy friends away. Help!? What do I do?
2006-10-02 15:31:07 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
well at this point and I'm sure you'll hear it a 100 times on here..but you basically have 2 options..either talk to him and tell him how you feel, that you love him but he is gonna have to give you some room, you have not(that we know of) given him a reason to be jealous or insecure, so he's gonna have to get over whatever his issues are...OR>...DUMP his as* and find a man that will respect you and treat you like a person and not a puppet..
2006-10-02 15:35:25 · answer #1 · answered by blondemom133 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Girl, walkout and don't look back. Yo said nothing but negative things, do you have to be run over by a truck before you see your future with this control freak. He will have you living in fear the rest of your life. People like that can't hold a woman or a job. First he chases everyone away then he secludes you, then he starts threating you and your family, next comes the beatings just enough to scare you. He will also threaten suicide if you leave him and little guilt trip to make you stay. If you live thru this period , and you've brought children into this dark hate world you live in , one day after many sleepless nights and fights you'll leave.
2006-10-02 15:41:00 · answer #2 · answered by dehba t 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
YES He IS a control freak. And the simple solution is to DUMP his ASZ. Please do your self a big big big favor. Either dump him or stand up to him and do it now before it is too late. Things are only going to get so much worse for you. This is the start of a bad relationship. Believe me when I say it IS going to GET WORSE. It will NOT get BETTER unless he agrees to some counsiling. Believe me please. When I say it will only get worse. I mean that in time it WILL get physical. Again believe what I am saying. If for any reason you doubt anything that I am saying check it out with a womens shelter. An abuse hotline will also backup what I am saying Address it now or later. Your choice, but your not hurt at this point in time. Don't wait until your hurt ACT NOW, before it's too late.
2006-10-02 15:43:22 · answer #3 · answered by GRUMPY 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, this boyfriend of yours sounds pretty scary. I would not want to be with a guy that controlling. I know it sounds that he really loves you, but think about it, if he really loves you, why would he treat you like that? If he loves you, he should trust you. I am sorry. I know you love this guy, but perhaps you have not think of the long term relationship. Can you possibly be with this guy forever? You should break up with him before the situation gets worse.. as in not even letting you go out, etc. Best of luck to you!
2006-10-02 15:34:22 · answer #4 · answered by Your Wife 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Its hard to give advice on realtionships because coming from my point of view or others...the answer would be dump him...and I know that is not easy to do...
Make sure you are with him for the right reasons...if he's treating you like this now how will it be if you bring a child in the mix. Do you want to bring a child in a shaky realtionship. Do you want his respect, then you have to ask for it...because it seems like he doesnt want to give it right now. You need to tell him that it bothers you what he is doing and you dont like that...sometimes men need you to tell them stuff. In reality i can write a book but you will end up doing what you feel is right...please listen to your mind and you heart...not just your heart.
2006-10-02 15:36:30 · answer #5 · answered by laguna_beach 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girlfriend, I know sometimes it is easier said than done, bhut let him go because it is going to get progressively worse. He feels the need to control and I'm telling you from experience it sometimes turns into physcial abuse because their jealousy really makes them start seeing things that are only true in his mind. About the baby part that is your body, no one can tell you what to do with or how to treat it but.
2006-10-02 15:38:42 · answer #6 · answered by Lesa Girl 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
why WOULDN'T you want to lose him? He sounds horrible. Get out before you have a kid with him. You don't want to be permanently connected to him and you certainly don't want your child to have a father like that. If you had a boy it would grow up to be like him and if you had a girl she would grow up and allow someone else to treat her like that. It is better to be alone than to be suffocated. If you marry this guy, things will only get worse, not better. RUN!!!
2006-10-02 15:37:20 · answer #7 · answered by kelsey 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
he is over baring you and it is just going to get worse as time goes by my ex was just like him i was not allowed to have any female friends and if i was cought talking to any she would fly off the handle tell me that I was unfaithful was cheating on her best bet is to cut all ties now and move on that is not love love is meeting half way not your partner going all the way and stopping you from doing what u want or what u want to wear love is caring sharing and being free to be your self
i wish u the best of luck
blessed be
white wizard
2006-10-02 15:41:09 · answer #8 · answered by white_wizard 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes he is and it sounds like you need to get out while you can. A child would bind you for life do not have no child while he is acting like this you will be sorry for the rest of your life not for the child but for the childs father
2006-10-02 15:34:52 · answer #9 · answered by just me 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have a controling dictator on your hands...leave before it gets worst ...these are the peeps who become abusers starting with mental and then move to physical..he already has no respent for your opinions and ignores you??.. u cannot lose what u dont have..he has u ...be a strong woman and think highly of yourself..then leave..
2006-10-02 15:41:38 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋