I just received an email from my husband of 10yrs. The email was intended for his girlfrien. Now i know he has been cheating for a year and a half, i know thats the reason why he wants to get a divorce. I dont want to leave, i've never worked since i've been with him and i have self esteem issues. Should i just look the other way?
2006-10-02 14:08:18 · 10 answers · asked by Chayis 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Don't be stupid. I suggest u save the email and present them to court as evidence. Then u can file for alimony.
2006-10-02 14:23:50 · answer #1 · answered by cheetah7 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
For the time being just play stupid! How dare he?
You say you have not worked in a while? First thing is first, since he is bringing home the money, it is a great time for you to start taking classes, education, etc. You want to make sure you get some good skills for the workforce. Get a PT job? Tell him you are saving for a Big Surprise for Him...
Start gathering evidence, pictures, etc. about this afair. It will come in handy at court. Document document document.
Start doing things for yourself, do your hair, go to the gym, buy new clothes, have fun!
Once you start taking control of this situation and know that you could stand on your own two-feet, I think you will have the confidence needed to move on from him.
Then when you are ready, leave him, not a word as to why. Pack up and start over. He can find out why through his lawyer.
In the meantime get him to pay for you to take some courses, get an education, use
2006-10-02 21:39:29 · answer #2 · answered by Jennifer J 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
really sorry to hear this but no you shouldnt look the other way....noone has to put up with that, you are a woman that needs to be showed she is loved and this guy deffinatly isnt doing that. you deserve better, there are ways to get back on ur feet and make a life for urself,check out ur local womens groups, they can give you the advice and start you need but you have to get rid of the cheating husband.....10 yrs isnt so bad when you look at the fact that if you stay married you may have 20 more of him just cheating to his hearts content and what kind of life would that be for you....get out girl ....self esteem issues or not, you are better then him and deserve much better....good luck and lets hope you make the right choice
2006-10-02 21:22:16 · answer #3 · answered by Mrs.m 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is tough. If being with him depends on ur survival, then i will say turn the other cheek. But that wouldn't matter cuz u said he wants a divorce, unless ur going to beg him not to divorce u. Is it possible to stay with relatives and enroll ur self in a short training program like nursing assistant, medical assitant. Are u educated, have any skills, work experience. Do u guys have kids. These factors are important. worst case scenrio u can join a branch of the military, get training, and make ur own money. Sadly to say in this world today marriages dont last as long as they used to, so a woman cant depend on a man to take care of her. A woman has to take care herself, or at least show a man she can take care of herself, cuz if he leaves her, she wont be left in a bad spot.
2006-10-02 21:17:51 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't you look the other way! By looking the other way, you are saying that yes, it's okay to walk all over you, and yes, your feelings don't matter as much as his. You've wasted a lot of time on this jerk - time you could have spent back in school/meeting someone new. He doesn't even have the decency to talk about your marriage together with you first! File for divorce, get a new haircut, and update your resume. Everything will be okay in the end - if it's not okay then it's not the end. And you can pass this advice on to him if you care to - if she does it with you, she does it to you!
2006-10-02 21:19:13 · answer #5 · answered by Jemma 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he intended for you to read it..maybe thats his way of letting you know he really wants to end things. I've been doing the same thing you have for many years but it doesn't mean that neither you or me have to stay in a marriage that is irrepairable. Don't hang on for those reasons..show this man how strong you actually are. Get away from him and do the best you can. Don't let him do these things to you. If you need someone to talk to..I have a good listening ear. Good Luck girl!
2006-10-02 21:14:50 · answer #6 · answered by justwonderingwhatever 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I would leave him because no one deserves to be cheated on and I know how it feels and you can get a job. If I was you I would look the other way and never go back to him!
2006-10-02 21:17:21 · answer #7 · answered by monkey 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely NOT!!! Honey you don't deserve to live like that. There are ways to support yourself, a man who cheats is not worth being with. If you need an ear and a friend please feel free to email or im me.
2006-10-02 21:12:42 · answer #8 · answered by the_mystical_runt 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
he's been cheating for 1 1/2 years? Dumb the guy already.
2006-10-02 21:22:40 · answer #9 · answered by goldenbrowngod 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OH PLEASE!!!! You let him CHEAT??? Tomorrow go to a lawyer and then go to the bank. Tell the Lawyer you want to start a divorce. Tell the bank you want to change banks. Go to a different bank and open an account in your name alone. Find a place to stay.Maybe a friends.
2006-10-02 21:22:44 · answer #10 · answered by whataboutme 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋