i have three children by the end of the night i dont want to make love have sex or even a quickie whats wrong with me!
2006-10-02 12:25:47 · 14 answers · asked by denise l 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
nothing is WRONG with you, you are simply tired, exhausted, and running ragged with keeping your home and relationship going.
What I'd suggest is to start out small, and make changes that keep you organized, in control of day-to-day activities, help you remember what is going on when, and to further positive communication with your spouse and children.
The lack-of-time and always-tired is no good way to live. Pace yourself, give yourself credit for all the patience and good you do, and things will turn around a bit.
Also, take a few seconds, you DO have at least that much time every day, and look in the mirror. Tell yourself, positively and sincerely that you ARE a beautiful worthwhile woman, with patience and more time on your hands today than you had yesterday.
Think positive, work WITH yourself, not against all the aggravations, and see how things improve.
Take good care and smile----:)
2006-10-02 12:31:05 · answer #1 · answered by megettingbetter 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Not a thing. You are tired and you are entitled to be tired. You need to ask for help from someone you can trust to take the kids for a day and a night. Plan ahead and rest that morning, then pamper yourself even if it's at home in the tub, cut the toenails, shave the legs, condition the hair. Light some candles and plan a dinner at home, Simple where you won't have to work! Even a good pizza and beer is good. Just something you two enjoy and tell him to be ready to spend an evening with just you and the music you like. Dance a little, or whatever. Sex isn't everything. When you're this tired just a back rub or lying together watching a movie is better than going out. Remember no pressure. There is a pill L-ARGININE 500 mg. a supplement that is supposed to help the sex drive. Take at least 30 min. before. You need lubricant also!!!! Now, this should happen, dates once a month. Even if it's just for a few hours. You need to plan it and let him help. He needs to know how important it is to you and participate in it with you. He can plan one time and you the next, take turns. Goo luck mom
2006-10-02 12:41:14 · answer #2 · answered by MISS-MARY 6 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Sometimes our hormone levels change after we have babies. It could be that your sex drive dropped b/c of having babies, or it could just be that you may have some lingering post-partum depression (not sure how old your children are though) or it could also possibly be that you're just that darn tired & exhausted after being in mommy-mode all day.
Either way, have you talked to your doctor? Not to sound like a commercial, but they may be able to prescribe you something to help boost your sex drive a bit. Also, making the home-front chores & childcare more of a 50/50 (or at least a 60/40) split between you and your hubby will work wonders. If you both share in the parental duties, then everyone is a little happier... and happy people have great sex LOL :) I hope you find something that works for you... good luck with it!
2006-10-02 12:32:23 · answer #3 · answered by Jemmie Vee 3 · 2⤊ 2⤋
You're tired honey. Very, very, tired and you need a break. Besides, when you're exhausted, stressed out and taking care of three children...and a husband it's hard to focus on what YOU need. Tell your guy you need to find/hire a babysitter for the weekend and take off somewhere for the first day of it by yourself. Get a manicure or a pedicure. Maybe a massage. And then....check yourself into a nice hotel/motel and sleep. Tell him that based on how you are feeling when you wake up on the second morning of your "escape" will depend upon whether you invite him to join you. Hey...it's worked for a lot of women I know and I hope it works for you. Hang In There!!!
2006-10-02 12:31:08 · answer #4 · answered by Dhara 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Sex drive starts in the mind though thoughts. In fact all action starts in the mind as a thought. The very fact you have 3 children suggests you do not have the time to invest in thinking about your sexual ideals or fantasizes and therefore when you think you should want sex the energy is not there. Instead your thoughts are of being the best you can be for your children. Such as being well rested, or providing well for their needs. This is not a bad thing or a bad investment but don't forget to set aside some time to invest in yourself to. Be it you choose to invest sexually or not!
And if i maybe so bold have you ever chosen a fantasy to enact. Perhaps you can decorate the bedroom in a jungle scene(party streamers make interesting vine effects) for just one evening and wear nothing a beach-cloth long after the kids are in bed of course. The preparations alone may end up helping in building the anticipation. Or thought what it would be like to treat you man like you are a mere maidservant to a King.
Just a few ideas. Take them as far as you like or simplify them to suit your over all goal. And most of all {wink wink} enjoy the fruits of your labors.
2006-10-02 12:58:25 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
I actual have freinds that dont care in the event that they on no account do it back, they have misplaced any and all sexpersistent, you need to think of your hormones substitute at diverse situations and additionally you're drained i assume after finding after the youngsters and the homestead and so on, a number of my freinds intercourse drives have come back and a few not, I actual have the contrary I actual have a plenty greater sexpersistent than my husband which drives him mad, he needs i had no sexpersistent, dont worry plenty approximately it, I actual have heard of people who take it slowly back with there companions, like relationship back, you recognize superb meal jointly, in line with probability a shower or rubdown one yet another, your sexpersistent might come back once you at the instant are not feeling so drained or pressurised. in case you attempt those issues and nonetheless not something then seek for further help.
2016-12-15 18:38:22 · answer #6 · answered by gambrell 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have a classic case of "tired mom syndrome." While it is not a terminal disease, it will take about 18 years to clear up.
There is nothing wrong with you. You are just tired. I swear it took me until each of my children were over the age of 2 before I finally got enough sleep to feel like myself.
A suggestion - wake up earlier in the morning. Have a special time with your husband before the day starts and you are too tired to have sex. It is a great way to start the day.
2006-10-02 12:30:20 · answer #7 · answered by physandchemteach 7 · 2⤊ 2⤋
your body is exhausted and the only way you will have that "intimate moment', is to try and take time out for yourself. i have three kids also, my youngest is 12 months old, thisis what i do, go into the bathroom, fun you a bath, tell hubby that you needs some time to yourself, your going to take a bath, do it when you put the last kid down. then ask him for a massage so after your bath you are relaxed. then give him one. then take it from there. my second great idea is go out on friday nite, you and your sister or best friend, treat yourself to a dinner, maybe a movei, or just go out and i gurantee when you come back you will be well rested. it works trust me, i do all the above. when hubby gets home maybe aout a good hour after he gets home, ask him to meet you in the bathroom for a quickie. give the litttlest child to the oldest to watch for like 10minutes. email me for more info. lavitaharper@yahoo.com
2006-10-02 12:37:06 · answer #8 · answered by VivaciousandSexy 3 · 2⤊ 2⤋
You're obviously just too darn tired. It's hard to feel sexy if you're beat at the end of the day. Maybe try getting some help with the kids...(from their dad)...get a baby sitter and some rest and then go on a date with your mate...if he's the object of your sexual desire.
On the other end of the scale, do you even want sex? If you really want it, I think you'll eventually find a way. Good luck!
2006-10-02 12:29:37 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
Your normal. You are tired and exhausted. You probably need a vacation. Kids take a lot of your energy and when it comes time to have sex you would rather sleep because you are tired. Go away with your husband for a romantic weekend without the kids. It will come back. Good luck
2006-10-02 12:29:30 · answer #10 · answered by Snuffy Smith 5 · 2⤊ 2⤋