I was married to my childhood sweet heart for 13 years. I love her unequivically and without question. Our history was rocky and crazy at times but I cannot get her out of my head. We have been divorced almost a year now and we both have significant others. Since we have 3 kids together, we see and talk to eachother every couple of days. Just when I think it is okay and I can go on, I see her and immediately want her back. I still cry quite often. My girlfriend is aware of the situation (that I still am heart broke) but doesnt realize the extent. I could potentially spend the rest of my life with my girlfriendand live a happy life (she is everything that my wife refused to be!), if I could ever get my exwife out of my heart. Help! I try to convince her to come back at least weekly. I am going insane. It's like I would rather live in a bad relationship with my ex than a sexy, healthy, fun relationship with my girlfriend!
2006-10-02 12:23:48 · 9 answers · asked by dumb guy 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If you ask her weekly and she hasn't given you a sign she wants the same thing then maybe it's her way of telling you she's moved on and doesn't want to go back. You seem to have found the woman you was looking for in your girlfriend since you said she's everything that your wife refused to be and if you continue doing this to her your going to end up losing her as well. Maybe if you start focusing on a future with your girlfriend instead of fantasizing about a life with your ex you may realize the happiness you seek is right there beside you right now.
2006-10-02 13:30:57 · answer #1 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's somthing wrong with that! I know you're heart broken, I think we've all been at one point or another but however this woman refuses to make you happy. And even though she is or was the love of your life for some reason or the other she doesn't want to be anymore! My advice for you is to move on and live happly with the woman you have now. Maybe your ex will realize what she lost once she sees you dont care anymore! Perhaps the game of Hard to Get is what you want to do. On the flip side you have a great girlfriend who want's to make you happy. Dont ruin that, take that chance and be happy with her. Your ex will soon realize what she left behind! Crying is okay but soon you'll scare the girl you have now, she'll feel she's not doing a good job then you'll really be alone! Be stron. GOD BLESS
2006-10-02 19:29:10 · answer #2 · answered by Trina Sledge 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your going to end up hurting your girlfriend badly if you dont knock off this ignorance. Why do you have a girlfriend if you are pining over your ex wife?
Dont you think that would hurt her feelings? Do you not care about her feelings?
Be honest with your girlfriend so she has the opportunity to move on and find someone who loves her and would like to make a life with her so you can be misresable and by yourself. You have a mental problem which needs to be dealt with. You are hurting someone else now.
2006-10-02 19:32:14 · answer #3 · answered by happydawg 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your feelings for someone doesn't stop at a breakup a divorce or death it stays if you were with that person for a long time that will never change but that doesn't mean you have to stop living your life and not move on, you said that you have a wonderful girlfriend and that's a step just remember you didn't fall in love with your wife over night and you won't just stop loving her that easy either but in time the pain will lessen and eventually you will not hurt as much that all i can tell you and be honest with you i hope that this helps you
2006-10-02 19:34:34 · answer #4 · answered by foxxylesley 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you get those feelings, just think of the reasons WHY she's your ex. Don't make yourself miserable, it takes time to get over a long relationship. In a year, you'll more than likely have moved on and no longer want to put yourself back in a bad situation.
And if that doesn't work, try therapy.
2006-10-02 19:30:03 · answer #5 · answered by Amelie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some counseling would not hurt you! Just because you pick the kids up and drop them off , don't mean you got to tag you a- ss in her house. So if you stop seeing her weekly and begging her back is just wrong when you have a good women who stands by you. So my advice is to stop seeing her and let your heart heal.
2006-10-02 19:50:24 · answer #6 · answered by kierstead 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A year is not a long enough time to heal.It takes time to heal old wounds.My opinion,I do not think you are ready for a girlfriend.I think you need to take time off from women completley.Try to work on making yourself a better person.Once you have done that you will be ready for a girlfriend that you can give your full love and devotion too.Goodluck!
2006-10-02 19:30:57 · answer #7 · answered by Gin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know of any specific tricks to get the "ex" out of one's head; to me, it comes naturally, I force myself to "forget", day by day - focusing on the positives of my new life, rather than on the negatives of not living the old. You have to actively combat your feelings, I guess; don't let your feelings control *you*. Perhaps therapy or depression treatment could help.
2006-10-02 19:28:13 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont think your being fare to the one you are with right now... i think you should end it with her and save her heartache ...as for you not getting over your ex maybe in time you will or if you work something out with her who knows.... but i know you should do whats right and just follow your heart.
2006-10-02 19:35:26 · answer #9 · answered by maureen a 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋