I was in a serious relationship for 4 years, but the distance (NY and CA) was hard on us. We broke up, but I moved back to CA and we tried to rekindle our relationship. She was my "kindred spirit" and I think she still is. When she told me she wanted to "give other guys a chance," I was devastated because I was going to propose to her that night. I held onto that ring for a while before I decided to bring it back to Tiffany's, got my money back, but donated it to the World Wildlife Fund in her name (I love animals). I never talked to her since then (about 4 years ago), so she never found out. She, too, is married now.
Every now and then, I get a phone call with our song playing in the background. I know it is her, and that she is also still thinking of me, too. I love my wife, but for some reason there is still a part of me that still thinks of and remembers my "kindred spirit." Is this wrong? Just want to know if there are other folks who are going through this, also.
2006-10-02 12:21:46 · 6 answers · asked by Fresh Prince 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
In response to Nisey's question, she is not my first love. It is a complicated story.
Before I was with my kindred spirit (KS) I was with the girl that I am now married to. When I went away to NY, we broke up and I got together with my KS. When KS broke up with me, I got back together with my gf and now wife. She helped me get through the hard times, and we fell in love again. If anything, I will say that my current wife is my first love. That was a bit complicated (although already very simplified).
2006-10-02 12:35:32 · update #1
I've shared this with my wife. She is so loving and understanding. When I get that call, she knows because she can see it in me... I stay on the phone for 3-5 minutes without speaking, and I get a smile, and sometimes a tear will come down (so she says). She completely understands, because she was there when I was hurt and broken hearted.
2006-10-02 12:38:07 · update #2
I forgot to mention that my wife does not bother me when I get this call. She just leaves me along (and sometimes leaves the room) until I am ready to talk about it (or just leaves it alone if I don't bring it up).
2006-10-02 12:39:32 · update #3
You don't say if this was your 'first love', but it isn't uncommon to feel the feelings that you do. Certain songs touch our hearts and take us back to a special memory, so why wouldn't special people. It is nice to know that you are being thought about. Be happy with the decision you made and keep building a loving, kind and strong relationship with your wife. Next time you get that phone call, just smile and say to yourself, "Thanks for the memory."
2006-10-02 12:28:53 · answer #1 · answered by Nisey 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it absolutely alright and normal to have thoughts and feelings for other people even when you're married. Just because you married someone else doesn't mean that you're not capable of feelings for others. That is totally ridiculous. We're all humans. I bet your wife also has these thoughts. Why not ask her and see if she'll trust you enough to share them with you. It may help you both.
2006-10-02 12:33:33 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why is it people always want what they dont have?
Then they start fantasizing about them and make it sound all romantic and start saying crazy things.
I believe your a hopeless romantic in a fantasy world. Their is nothing wrong with fantasy as long as you realize that is what it is and take it no further. I am afraid your wife would be deeply hurt and probably leave your sorry a.ss. and then you could fantasize about her too.
2006-10-02 12:40:17 · answer #3 · answered by happydawg 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
yes, i do sometimes. i still live in the same town as most of my ex's, so i either run into them or see something that reminds me of them. but on the other hand, i wouldn't change anything. if i was with one of them, i wouldn't having my wonderful husband of my precious son. life has a funny way of making things work out for the better.
2006-10-02 12:26:44 · answer #4 · answered by redpeach_mi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes I do.
But I never wallow in the cesspool of 'what might have been'.
I'd love to see both of my ex-wives again... with a tombstone marking their grave.
Stop obsessing goddamn it!!! Be happy with what you've got.
2006-10-02 12:47:16 · answer #5 · answered by Larry F 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes, i do think of my ex, i guess that is something we can't forget no matter how hard we tried.
2006-10-02 12:26:57 · answer #6 · answered by aemi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋