2006-10-02 11:51:25 · 23 answers · asked by holly b 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
some times
2006-10-02 11:53:02 · answer #1 · answered by chuco 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am hopeful that it is possible! I have recently learned that my husband had been involved in a 6 month affair that ended just a little over 3 months ago. I found out by reading some emails the other woman had written that were some how left in our computers time-line. The words I read cut like a knife and left it impossible for him to deny when I confronted him. We have been going to counseling to try to work past this. He seems like a changed man and has recommitted himself to our marriage. I have always felt that he was holding back in our marriage, now it seems that he is not holding back at all. I feel more loved by him now than ever before. However, I am having trouble trying to forgive him, and to forget the words that I read that would change my life forever. We have 5 children together, and while they were my initial motive for trying to work things out, now I am still in the marriage because the bond we share is stronger than ever. I know in my heart that he will never do anything like this again. Now I just need to learn how to forget about it so it doesn't comsume my every thought. The future of the relationship depends on how much remorse the cheater shows, how much responsibilty he is willing to take, and the changes that he makes once the affair is out in the open. The rest is up to the one who was cheated on to learn to except what has happened, and move on from there.
2006-10-02 12:35:21 · answer #2 · answered by LadyLee 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Many marriages do. The real question would be, what has changed in the relationship such that cheating won't keep happening? Most cheaters just keep cheating for whatever reasons they have. Many times the marriages that stay together have one (or two) cheater(s) and one who decides to look the other way. So marriages can make it but they are usually not very good marriages. Once in a while though the cheater reallyl changes and the marriage becomes better than it ever was....but that's one in a million.
2006-10-02 12:01:30 · answer #3 · answered by ScubaGuy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on the people in the marriage. If they love each other enough and the one who cheated realizes how much it hurt his/her partner and doesn't do it again I see no reason why a marriage can't go on. I mean everyone makes mistakes.
2006-10-02 12:00:51 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No...I was cheated on by my Ex wife...and I will tell you I would have rather taken a server beating than be cheated on. The pain and hurt from being cheated on NEVER goes away....the mental damage NEVER goes away..by that I mean your ability to trust someone again is shattered. It would take a MUCH stronger person than I to Forgive an affair....but you will NEVER forget it.
I have friends both male and female that have been cheated on...and we have talked about this....and you know they all have the same comment when you ask them "how are things going?"
Oh...okay...we went to therapy...and we now know that we were both in the wrong and we have worked through it....but I still worry sometimes. Of course you worry...your trust in that person has been shattered...your self worth has been challenged...how could you ever trust or respect that person again?
2006-10-02 14:43:40 · answer #5 · answered by oldman 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope, No, never
They have to start all over. Meaning...they need to divorce or at least separate. Then start the dating process all over again and rebuild the whole relationship and the whole trust issue.
If they cannot do this, then it will never work because the one who did not cheat will always be jealous and hold it over the other person. And the one that cheated cannot be trusted without earning trust. It is a circle that needs broken by starting the whole relationship over. That is, if they want to be together in the end or if they think it is worth it.
2006-10-02 11:55:00 · answer #6 · answered by AveGirl 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, it depends.
If the partner that was cheated on is a forgiving person that trusts easily, then it is quite possible.
However, in most cases, a relationship, although tried to work out after infidelity occurs, usually ends up in divorce/breakup.
2006-10-02 11:56:25 · answer #7 · answered by ♪Msz. Nena♫ 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes if both parties are will to work at the marriage fully and honestly. but it will take time to earn that trust back from the one who cheated. anything is possible since most marriages does have at least one affair by a spouse.
2006-10-02 11:54:28 · answer #8 · answered by lady S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, if you are willing to forgive the cheating partner! It all depends on the person who got cheated on!
2006-10-02 12:03:10 · answer #9 · answered by Gerry 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actually. It depends on BOTH people. Not just one. The cheater has to be willing to admit his/her wrongdoing. The one cheated on has to be willing to forgive and BOTH have to be willing to work things out. It is difficult and COUNSELING is a must. There is tremendous emotional baggage to deal with. Affairs or even cheating has nothing to do with (although you horny folks out there may disagree) with the sex. It has to do with esteem. Self esteem, the way we esteem others, greed, lust and selfishness.
The answer to this question is absolutely. Take it from a mature adult, not an adolescent WHO thinks they know. I have been counseling couples for 21+ years and have seen couples flourish and be healed, even after a terrible affair.
Its' up to you both.
2006-10-02 12:36:22 · answer #10 · answered by JudoMan77 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋