This morning after cooking my husbands breakfast I put his plate down on the table and I was about to go pour him a cup of coffee but then the baby started crying so I had to run upstairs and I forgot all about it because I had to breastfeed her and change her diaper. While I was doing this my husband walked out the door and told me that I forgot to pour him his coffee and that I was a bad wife because I didn't take care of him. I told him I didn't mean to but he just slammed the door. I called him up later at work but he said he wouldn't talk to me until he got home tonight. I've been feeling so sad today and have had spells of crying and thinking I will never be a good wife even though I try so hard :(
2006-10-02 09:35:16 · 41 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yes you are and you need to be properly reprimanded.
2006-10-02 09:44:54 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he just worke up on the wrong side of the bed. If that were me, I'd "forget" to pour his coffee for the next week! He does have arms and legs, right? It's not like he can breastfeed the baby for you. Sorry, that's not helpful, He needs to be a little more understanding and a lot less jealous. That does happen, husbands sometimes get jealous of a new baby and all the attention the require. Talk to him about it. he might not even realize he's being a jerk. Good luck.
2006-10-02 09:40:54 · answer #2 · answered by nclaura402 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like your husband is being very selfish.. He is taking into consideration that you are taking care of his child, his household and well as him...
He is very capable of doing things for himself... If he wanted the coffee, then he should have poured it himself....
There is no reason in the world for you to feel bad, that you forgot to pour his coffee.. The baby is priority.. Please don't let him put you down, for not doing certain things around the house or for him. The kind of talk on his part, is a way of lowering your self esteem. Don't let it happen.... Remember that you are not his maid, you are his wife. He do for him, but he needs to do for you as well...... He also needs to treat you like one...
A real man, would understand and not only that, he would help you out. Being a stay at home Mom and Wife is a full time job. It is not as easy as many men think it is......
Good Luck and God Bless!
2006-10-02 09:42:45 · answer #3 · answered by Torres 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry that you have such an oaf for a husband. With a new baby he shouldn't be so cruel.
Maybe he is feeling neglected because a new baby does use up a lot of energy. But, I suspect that he is one of those guys who expect his wife to wait on him hand and foot.
That is not a partnership. A marriage should be more than a partnership. When one person can't hold up his/her side the other balances it out. Love, respect and consideration are the cornerstones of your union. It appears that your husband feels himself to be the ruler rather than a partner.
You may need to get some help from clergy or relatives in this matter. I will pray for you.
2006-10-02 09:41:29 · answer #4 · answered by Sandra K 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you're not a bad wife for forgetting his coffee.
You took the time to cook him breakfast, and obviously you made the coffee... does he not know where the coffee cups are? Does he not have legs? He could have poured it himself. For crying out loud. He was out of line.
Sounds like he's got jealousy issues with the new baby. I sure hope you two can work things out.
2006-10-02 09:39:59 · answer #5 · answered by MissJ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look, this is unbelievable.
You are absolutely not a bad wife. Does he not have a hand and a portion of brain to pour his coffee himself? It is very nice of you to do it for him, great, but if the baby needs you etc, I find your husband's reaction really bad.
Mind you, I had the same sort of attitude at dinner tonight. Ha ha, let's form a club. I left the room and said he should do his own cooking, though.
2006-10-02 09:55:24 · answer #6 · answered by Claire 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is the husband who pees on you as part of sex?
Ma'am, stop listening to anything that man says.
No, you are not a bad wife.
I notice he was able to walk out the door. So I guess he could have walked to the coffee pot.
This guy sounds like serious trouble. You should consider marriage consuling -- bet he won't go -- found out where the nearest woman's shelter is, and make sure you can look after your self.
2006-10-02 09:41:19 · answer #7 · answered by o41655 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl, I hope you're messing w/us. You sound like these women on the channel LIFETIME. Get a backbone. Ok, I'll say it. No, you are not a bad wife(as if you didn't already know). So, when u said your vows did you promise to be his mom? A lot of times men think we're "superwomen". They think we can cook, clean, go to work, take care of the kids, don't forget to take care of them, don't forget to give them sex, don't forget all the Dr's appointents, don't forget their mama's birthday, don't forget to change the baby's diapers and now this punk wants to make sure you don't forget his coffee. Well, if you're a superwoman and you want to stay that way, go ahead do your thing girl. If you're not then, tell him to kiss your ***.
2006-10-02 09:57:22 · answer #8 · answered by Tasha 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is an asshole and he's going to continue to do that until you stop him. Next time he starts ranting about his coffee pour it in a baby bottle for him, maybe he'll get the hint. If you let him make you feel like this he's going to continue, make him grow up or you need to shut up. You have to know that YOU created this monster, YOU catered to him, YOU have to deal with him. Your reacting just the way he wants you to...I would expect that behaviour form a 5 year old, not an adult.
2006-10-02 09:44:42 · answer #9 · answered by sasha 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Awww I can't believe that! It is DEFINATELY not your fault and don't be suckered into thinking that for even 1 second. You must be very sensitive and he knows that but he wanted to be a dick and be difficult. Maybe he is jelouse of the baby, he sure is acting like one to get your attention. Who do you think is more important? Worrying about the baby all day that depends on you for survival. Or your cry baby husband that has legs? He needs to stop being so selfish.
2006-10-02 09:41:42 · answer #10 · answered by fancy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I seriously hope this is a joke and you are going to be laughing at my expense. No human being deserves to be treated that way. I work 50 hours a week and my hubby is a stay at home dad. Dinner is usually waiting for me when I get home, but I'm not going to have a coronary if it isn't. Marriage is about working together. You are not his slave you are his partner. God gave him two hands he can pour his own coffee.
2006-10-02 09:41:22 · answer #11 · answered by OrianasMom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋