Anyone agrees with this? Give reasons or a kind of evidence for your answer showing different pionts of view. Anyone answers this very sensibly will be voted by me (which increases your score) ^_^.
2006-10-02 08:53:59 · 37 answers · asked by Don 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I agree. My wife and I have only had sex with each other, no one else. That did create a lot of trust and unity, because we havent "shared" our most intimate selves with anyone else. If we had, it can create roots of jealousy, lack of trust, you may compare sex to another person, etc. It opens up many floodgates.
having said that, I do beleive that even though people have had sex before marriage, they still can have a very strong marriage and relationship, but it really depends on the people involved, and how strong they are
when it all comes down to it, you can use the old adage, better safe than sorry. avoid sharing yourself with anyone besides your spouse and you avoid many dangers. disease, heartache, pain, jealousy, abortions, etc.
good luck
2006-10-02 09:00:04 · answer #1 · answered by xrionx 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I can't say that I believe this. My sister was a virgin when she got married. I'm not too sure about her husband but you could see and listen to him and pretty much figure out that if he wasn't a virgin, he damn sure didn't have a lot a experience. Well they stayed married for close to 7 years and it winded up into a divorce. He did the cheating of course but it's like once you do the forbidden fruit, and get caught, you're pretty much fu*k and it doesn't make a difference whether you both were virgins or not. It's real hard today to be meek and not have some type of sexual encounter before marriage. But I respect a lot of the people who do save themselves for that one imparticular individual.
2006-10-02 09:00:50 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
On a personal level, I don't agree with this statement. Those who agree will say that it's something that they shared together as a "first" experience that remains theirs alone...and therefor strengthens their bond. Others will disagree saying that those who "sow their oats" prior to marriage would be less inclined to stray. Neither side of this arguement holds water. Everyone knows that trust isn't guaranteed because of a common denominator such as virginity...it takes years to build and only suspicion to destroy it. Commitment is what it takes to build trust. If you aren't a virgin and marry someone who isn't, aren't you basing your trust in that person as a whole, past experiences/future wants and needs? Not just because you married as virgins? By the way...virgin sex "ain't the best"...
2006-10-02 09:28:48 · answer #3 · answered by Lando 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This could go either way. If people "sow their oats" when young, maybe they get it out of their system. But, that could make them more inclined to want sex with other people later. On the other hand, people who marry as virgins could possibly have a stronger bond of trust, as you say, since neither knows what sex is like with other partners. OR, that could backfire and make them very curious later on about sex with other partners. Maybe they will feel like they missed out by not, um, experimenting. There are several ways to look at this.
2006-10-02 09:00:28 · answer #4 · answered by Lotus 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think a stronger bond forms when you have mutually given to each other the most precious gift a person can give. The sharing for the first time of a truly intimate moment that can only be repeated to a certain degree should generate a stronger tie and a deeper connection. On the other hand - one or more of the parties involved may acquire a sense of curiosity of what they were "missing" and tend to stray outside of what they could now consider to be the confines of marriage. It truly depends on each person involved and the depth and commitment of their relationship.
2006-10-02 09:10:45 · answer #5 · answered by mzmscheeveeuhs 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I can only speak for myself, I was a Virgin when I met my husband he was not, when we got married I trusted him in EVERYTHING, My husband is more protective and secritive. I personally believe that when a person has sex with someone they make a bond of some type, I totally dedicated myself to my husband but because he had several partners before we got married his committment was not there. So I would opt for 2 virgins marrying each other, if you are Strong to stay a virgin and do things the right way you deserve a partner of equal standing, I hope this helps.
2006-10-02 08:58:56 · answer #6 · answered by whattheheck 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Of course, this will depend a lot on the individuals, but in general, I disagree. I have 2 friends that married as virgins (both female, spouses were not virgins) and they were curious to see if sex with another partner would be different. And, they both ended up having affairs, and getting divorced. I was not a virgin, and have been happily married for 27 years.
2006-10-02 09:00:41 · answer #7 · answered by nurse ratchet 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree. My husband and I were both virgins when we got married. We have been happily married now for 10 years. We don't ever have to worry about past partners because there aren't any. We learned everything sexually together, so there is no wondering where the other one learned that move or position. Everything in the sexual aspect is just shared between the two of us. I could never, ever imagine being with another man, and my husband feels the same way about other women. Our marriage is very sacred to us. About along the same lines as our children. We would never want someone Else's child instead of our own, nor would we want another mate.
2006-10-02 08:58:55 · answer #8 · answered by AsianPersuasion :) 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
while they may have a stronger bond of trust if they are not sexually compatible it will not matter. Why? because they will always wonder what someone else could have done for them. this fear and thought will invade every arument they have - every tiff and spat.
It used to be that women just took what they got. not anymore. more women are inclinded to say I want this.. and then when they don't get it go looking for it.
so... it really doesn't matter about the strength of the bond.. what really matters is the compatability.
thats why I belive that you should only casually date until you are around 28 or so.. so you can find out what you like and don't like (to do or have done) then when the right guy comes around then you know what your boundries are and you can have a more meaningful relationship if/when you get married!
2006-10-02 08:59:43 · answer #9 · answered by .... 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
This is an horrendous idea, depriving young people of so much pleasure and potentially condemning them to share their lives with sexually incompatible partners. The opposite would be more realistic. Oblige engaged couples to live together for at least a year before marriage so they do not use a holiday as the yardstick for their future sex life.
We have a saying in England appertaining to this:
'Would you buy a car without first driving it around the block?'
Christianity and Islam converge in the extreme, both eager to oppress the instincts of the Human Race.
2006-10-02 10:00:47 · answer #10 · answered by Clive 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Totally agree with you! Mainly because they will be on the same level as far as sexually. Therefore once they connect and have a soul tie their bond of trust and commitment will be stronger because they lost their virginity's at the same time.
2006-10-02 09:01:56 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋