My husband quit smoking pot for 2 years. He started up again and lied about it. When he finally told the truth he asked if I wanted to. What the hell? I am so mad about the lying that I have lost alot of trust. Should I just chill out and let it slide or will he become the full blown pot head he once was? Any suggestions on how to handle this?
2006-10-02 08:14:37 · 42 answers · asked by limeallure 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Confront the issue head on. Tell him that you are disappointed in the fact that not only that he started back up, but he felt compelled to lie to you about it.
2006-10-02 08:17:53 · answer #1 · answered by Chistiaŋ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was in the same boat. He always promised me he'd quit. It never happened, his problem just got worse and worse. The more money we had, the more hed spend on pot. We were both major potheads by the time we broke up ( for other reasons). I've since quit, and I have to say I feel intelligent again for the first time in, 6 years? Don't you feel better sober? What kid deserves two pothead lamos for parents? Don't start smoking again just to keep a man. You don't deserve that and neither does your child. He'll never quit pot. Not until he absolutely has to. You need to think long and hard about that. You need to decide whether to put up with him lying forever (honestly lying doesnt stop at pot, he's probably going to lie about other things to), and being a pothead loser and honestly an unfit father. Or you can leave, save yourself and your child from drug use, and focus on being the best mommy you can be. Take it from me, life's a lot better sober.
2016-03-27 02:20:15 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he was once a full blown pot head. He is headed that way again.
Strongly encourage him to get help for his addiction and to find out what is bugging him so much. That he needs to smoke pot.
2006-10-02 08:17:30 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had this issue with my ex-spouse. He made the choice of weed over me and our children. He was a chronic user. It caused a lot of problems.
The reason that he lied to you was that he was trying to aviod you becoming angry--believe it or not...even though it is making you even angerier now! LOL..guys. You shouldn't chill him out--and he is a big boy. You need to state your boundaries. I.e., "I don't want to smell that stinky crap on your breath when we are going to get it on...or when you kiss me." "I don't want the kids to find your stash--don't keep it in the house--lock it up." "No friends coming over and having a smoke fest." "I don't want to smoke it---I don't want to breath it." "You can smoke it as long as it doesn't interfere in our family life, marriage life, social life, and working life--if it does, we have a problem." Those kinds of things. Deside where you stand, think about it, and calmly communicate with him about it.
I would ask him why he started up again--something might be bothering him. He might be feeling old...thinks he has lost that fun side of him...or something more serious. He might be depressed.
Good luck.
2006-10-02 08:25:15 · answer #4 · answered by What, what, what?? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hopefully you have outgrown the weed. In any event talk to him while he's straight and if he doesn't listen or want to listen then i would give him an ultimatum. If you have children, then i would kick his *** out of the house, but get rid of his stash too. Put up NO SMOKING signs. Chances are if he has started again, he will not want to stop and it will probably get worse unless you put your foot down and if he really cares about you, he won't want to lose you..........good luck!
2006-10-02 08:19:22 · answer #5 · answered by charlie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As smoker of marijuana, i kinda get where hes comming from. My girlfriend doesnt smoke either, but i ask her whenever shes around me and im smoking, its very hard to come out to someone and say their smoking weed, give him credit for comming to you in the first place, bettter you find out from his mouth rather that you walking in on him while hes smoking.
But to handle this, tell him how you really feel about him smoking, if you dont want to smoke, then tell him that. I think if he sees that you dont want to be around him while hes high then he will eventually quit.
2006-10-02 08:21:52 · answer #6 · answered by The infamous bongblaster 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your little weed smoking boy friend need some serious help. He quit for 2 years but chemical dependence almost always progressly come back to haunt you. Tell him to get some help. It will only get worse and might lead to other drugs.
2006-10-02 08:18:30 · answer #7 · answered by Ellen J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's impossible to control another human being. You can help him ...ONLY if HE WANTS help. I think you 2 should have a long talk about what you both want out of life & see where the chips fall. Only then can you make an educated decision about what to do.
Good Luck.
2006-10-02 08:19:12 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He lied because he knew you would be mad, atleast he didn't want to get you mad, let him continue in moderation, relationships are about give and take, smoking weed is not as bad as society makes it out to be
2006-10-02 08:19:23 · answer #9 · answered by mohvictor 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is lying about it, find out where he keeps it and take it and flush it down the toilet. He can not ask you for it, because that would mean he had to admit he lied, but if he does ask for it, tell him that since he said he was not smoking any more you flushed it since he would not be needing it...
2006-10-02 08:17:35 · answer #10 · answered by Suthern R 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋