I love my husband but I told him that if he relapsed again that I would divorce him. Obviously, after 3 relapses I threatened divorce but never followed through. I can't go on living my life with someone who just told me recently that he will "try" not to pop any pills. I have really lost touch with him and I always worry whether he is high or not. And as far as having kids I don't want to have them with him (even though we were trying). Even though he wants kids. I don't want to be a babysitter anymore. He is an adult and should no better. He is a great person with a wonderful heart but..... What should I do?
2006-10-02 06:56:11 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Love conquers all ...this is just a addiction issue.
I hope with your love ...your husband will be able to fine good life...and be an ideal dad for your kids..in future... gud wishes. to you folks.
2006-10-02 07:01:02 · answer #1 · answered by JessiMC 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
That's a tough one. The same thing happened to my brother in law, who was addicted to vicodin as well as other pills. He has been through rehab too.
You can't be expected to cover for your husband and live your life stressed out all the time worrying about this. If he wants kids and wants to stay in the marriage, he needs to decide what is more important to him and stick with it. You need a partner, not a codependent. Just my opinion, good luck.
2006-10-02 06:59:15 · answer #2 · answered by mandita1022 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My brother in law is also an addict as well as my sister. There has been many attempts to help but they have failed. A big part of recovery for someone like that relies on the individual. You can not love them enough to make up for them not loving themselves. He has to want to get better. Has he had any professional help to try and get clean? A good way to tell if he is high is looking into his pupils. If they are tiny like pin holes it means he is using. It is a hard choose but remember that this is his problem and you deserve to have a good life too. Keep that in mind when you decide to stay or go. It is a hard battle. Try and keep your head up and good luck.
2006-10-02 07:03:42 · answer #3 · answered by Right_Stuff66 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should never ever ever go out with someone that has serious addictions of any sort. They are damaging to a realtionship, mentally and tiring physically. I understand how dificult a situation like this can be. I feel the same way about my partner smoking weed. You have to make the decision and stick with it. You will not be happy in the long run. Sit him down and have a talk with him. If he does not hear what you have to say- you will eventually need to leave him.
2006-10-02 06:59:12 · answer #4 · answered by BeautyMark 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you threaten then you very well should be prepared to follow through. This guy will need a will like the will to live to overcome his drug habit. Drug addiction takes a very long time to overcome and if you're not prepared for a lifetime of these ups and downs and if he decides he loves the drugs more than you, then perhaps you are best going elsewhere. I would advise to not inject kids into this environment.More pressures will not make things easier.
2006-10-02 07:01:33 · answer #5 · answered by MickYahoo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go ahead and get the divorce. I know it isn't easy but you have to live your life for yourself and not just for him. It is painfully obvious that if you stay with him you will never have the life you want or deserve. It won't be easy but get the divorce, it will be the best thing for you and for him also as it will show him that his addiction really is ruining his life. Right now by staying with him your showing him instead that no matter what he does things won't change.
2006-10-02 07:01:19 · answer #6 · answered by rkrell 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want kids and feel as though he is not the one you want kids with then you should leave him.
If he relapses you should leave him. Is he in any programs? Is he getting the pills off the street?
bottom line, if he screws up get out, 3 times is too many!
2006-10-02 06:59:44 · answer #7 · answered by Moosha 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think we always have feelings for the ones we have married and divorced forever, we did love them at one time,, I also have feelings for past loves, but it isnt enough to carry on and be back with those people,,
you need to make yourself happy before you can help him, Is this where you see yourself in 1 year, or 5 years, that alone will answer your question
2006-10-02 06:59:15 · answer #8 · answered by rich2481 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get out now. He knows now that just because you cry divorce, youre still n ot going to do it. Just leave, file for divorce and see if he straightens up then.
2006-10-02 06:58:53 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-10-18 08:56:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋