When a man loves a woman, the fact of fighting for her in my case seems to make things worst, weeks after I stop she seems to be showing signs she miss me. Is this a mind game?, she wants attention or someone to be after her for a lifetime?. Consider my question, has someone went back with him because he fought?, I think no woman out there would go with a guy because he has fought (and the relationship post-break up worked)
2006-10-02 06:31:10 · 15 answers · asked by livingthe30s 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well, I can say my ex I stayed gone because he didn't fight. I left because we had some... well a lot of things going on and I wasn't feeling loved.
A few weeks later he sais he wanted to talk to me, and I had hoped it was that he was seeing the error of his ways. He knew I had barely begin seeing someone else, and I secretly knew if he would have said that he was jealous, an ***, made a mistake, I would have taken him back in a heart beat.
He said none of these things, and instead said he wanted to be friends and was happy that if I couldn't be happy with him, I was happy with someone.
MORON!!!
I still think of him fondly, and while I am married now, to the man I dated after him with a son... we still talk. Recently we were on line, and after 10 years I had the guts to ask him why he never fought for me. He told me that he was scared, and said he was sorry. He didn't want me to reject him, but what he wanted to do was punch my then boyfriend, and tell me to quit playing games and come back to him to work everything out. I can say had he done that, I think we would still be together to this day. Generally, we get a long well and now he is still a very very close friend.
So, I say this. If you want her, at least make a stand. SAY SOMETHING. Maybe don't punch anyone, or anything... but make your desires known and show what you will do to keep her. Maybe it is a backwards game, it's possible. But no girl wants to think she is some man's idle accesory and easily disposable of so he can move on to the next. They do like to be chased! They sometimes need a little reassurance and to feel loved to feel secure.
It's up to you. I can't promise it will work, I can only share my own experience and say I am 100% positive it would have worked with my ex at the time right after our relationship.
Good luck.
2006-10-02 06:48:21 · answer #1 · answered by Willalee 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well from a womans point of view women love the thrill of the chase knowing that this guy is running after her probably she really does miss you and i need for you to stop chasing her and let her come you and then ask her to make up her mind and that someones feelings is at stake. Life is short let her know that if she is playing you are leaving and that the pond is very huge for a better word Well in some cases it has worked. Good luck with this girl.
2006-10-02 06:37:34 · answer #2 · answered by antionette_jazzy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What do you mean by "fighting"? If it means attempting to show her attention even when she doesn't seem 100% interested - yes, I think persistence *may* pay off in this case. It sometimes takes a little while for someone to make up their mind, or to fully "notice" another person. But if she told you in no uncertain terms that she was not interested in you being around or contacting her, then "fighting" would be better termed "harrassment", and is against the law. It is not quite clear from the question what your situation is.
2006-10-02 06:41:04 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, it doesn't work. Period. She likes the attention and the benefit she gets, but not you.
Sorry to be so blunt but I see this time after time.
I agree with the other person who wrote that you need to tell her straight up to either stay or go, period and follow through with that. No more dragging yourself through the mud, okay?
If she is gone because of a certain behavior of yours, take the time to seriously change it, THEN get in touch with her. I don't really know your details, but in general, if she wanted you back, you'd be there. Sounds like you are a comfortable place to fall when nothing better is happening and a habit that's hard for her to break.
Again, sorry, but I really would hate to see you see-sawing and breaking your heart over and over for nothing.
Hope it works out and if not, that you find a truly loving woman. Best of luck.
2006-10-02 06:44:39 · answer #4 · answered by whereRyou? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You see my friend it's all game of the heart and not the mind. Because you should look into yourself ask yourself that how much you love her , care for her and want her back . How she brought joy ,happiness into your life when she came to your life and how much trouble she caused you and many times she disappointed you.And besides you know her more than me or any body else so the question is would you survive without her a lot of made a mistake which they regretted later. It's just an advice but the real answer is in you.
2006-10-02 06:46:16 · answer #5 · answered by Incredible Hulk 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It could be a mind game, but it isn't likely. Maybe she is insecure with the relationship or maybe she had a very bad experience with one, or her parents did. Maybe she is scared to keep moving forward with you even though she loves you. I don't know if you fighting for it would work, but have you tried telling her how much you love her? Try making her feel special, let her know you care. Let her know she can trust you.
2006-10-02 06:39:21 · answer #6 · answered by horsin1787 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Never fight with a woman. Accept her responses at face value and then allow her to be the one that comes back to you. If she doesn't, it wasn't meant to be. Always keep moving forward. Find someone new.
2006-10-02 06:34:44 · answer #7 · answered by Cary Grant 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe that playing games is another form of lying. If a woman is playing hard to get, she's saying I can't have her. Fine. I don't want her. "But, but, you were supposed to chase me!" Tough luck, girl. Find yourself a guy who likes the games.
2006-10-02 06:36:24 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
most of the time after a break up we want a fight for the attention just to say that we got under your skin... so it sounds like she is just trying to get to you
2006-10-02 06:34:42 · answer #9 · answered by Shonda 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It could work if both people are willing and love each other. My husband never gave up on us. We started over- treating each other with respect, honesty, and trust. Now we are having fun dating and in love again.
2006-10-02 06:43:43 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋