I'm sad that you're in so much pain. If I understand you correctly, you are a man who would like to be attracted to women, but you keep finding yourself attracted to women. When that happens, you have sex with a woman in an effort to be heterosexual, but don't find it enjoyable.
It's not unusual for people who find themselves attracted to members of the same gender to try to make those feelings go away by having sex with members of the opposite sex. In fact, many people get heterosexually married in an effort to make those feelings go away. Unfortunately, some men can suppress their attractions for other men (and similarly for men who are attracted to men), but that doesn't mean the feelings go away.
I hope you will reach out to someone who can help you make peace with your feelings. I suggest you contact a nearby gay and lesbian community center or, if you're in the U.S., your state psychological association and ask for names of gay-friendly therapists. You might also try contacting PFLAG (Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays), which is usually a good source of support. What's important is to find people who will support you no matter what feelings you have.
2006-10-02 04:45:52
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answer #1
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answered by Markin Gomez 3
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I'm not at all sexually confused. By the way, sexual orientation is the more appropriate term - I don't prefer having sex with men, I have only ever had sex with men and have never had any desire to have sex with women. The word preference indicates making a choice, which is not the case.
2006-10-02 04:59:15
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answer #2
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answered by Speedo Inspector 6
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I disagree with Speedo Monster in regards to him saying that sexual orientation is the more appropriate term. In some cases, he's right. But, there is a such thing as sexual preference. You can prefer to only have sex with a man.. or you can prefer to only have sex with a woman. Unless you're raped, each time you have sex you're making a choice to do so. While it's true that you can't control who you're attracted to, you have absolute control over who you have sex with- again, unless you're raped. There is a such thing as abstinence. I have at least two male friends who are attracted to men but don't actually have sex with men because they feel it wrong for men to have sex with each other. Because they aren't attracted to women at all, they choose not to have sex at all. I'm sure its not easy.. but it was a choice based on moral beliefs, so I guess that makes it possible.
Now, if your confusion comes from you being attracted to both men and women and being unsure which you prefer sexually, it seems that being an active bisexual could help you discover who you are and what you like. As long as you're honest with who you date, there is no reason why you can't go out with Wendy on Thursday night and Russell on Saturday. I am bisexual. I recognize that I don't have any emotional attachment to women only a physical one. So my interactions with women are purely physical. My emotional attachment is with men (and its not necessarily due to the man I'm with because I've been with other men before). I've discovered my preference to be men.
2006-10-02 05:40:18
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answer #3
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answered by Honey 6
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Nope, I know exactly what I like
2006-10-02 10:25:38
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answer #4
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answered by Cinderella 4
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Not in the least!
2006-10-02 05:09:42
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answer #5
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answered by Anonymous
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no, i know what i like
2006-10-02 04:43:54
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answer #6
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answered by Alex 3
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you are?
try both then
2006-10-02 04:43:43
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answer #7
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answered by ☺Everybody still loves Chris!♥▼© 6
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Not at all.
You?
2006-10-02 04:42:49
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answer #8
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answered by C 7
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I'm not are you?
2006-10-02 05:26:17
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answer #9
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answered by sexylilles 3
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