this is for my b/f. we have been together for a year and a half.. and we love each other... his dad is making it really hard for us to be together he wont let us see each other and sumtimes not even talk.. we asked my parents if he could move in with me but my parents are afraid that his dad will try to cause problems like with molestation or statutary(spelling) rape charges.. im 16 and he is 18... he is still in high school... i would really appreciate it is someone could help us... the last resort is for him to move with his mom which is 2 hrs away...and we dont want to do that... also if he could find sumone to stay with until he graduates is that ok?
2006-10-01 16:05:04 · 22 answers · asked by dancachick08 1 in Politics & Government ➔ Law & Ethics
this is for my b/f. we have been together for a year and a half.. and we love each other... his dad is making it really hard for us to be together he wont let us see each other and sumtimes not even talk.. we asked my parents if he could move in with me but my parents are afraid that his dad will try to cause problems like with molestation or statutary(spelling) rape charges.. im 16 and he is 18... he is still in high school... i would really appreciate it is someone could help us... the last resort is for him to move with his mom which is 2 hrs away...and we dont want to do that... also if he could find sumone to stay with until he graduates is that ok? we lost our virginity together, last year.. both sets of parents know... if he only wanted me for sex he could get it sumwhere else its not only that... and just becuz other guys want just that doesnt mean he is the same!!!!
2006-10-01 16:10:57 · update #1
its so hard that we live 3 miles apart and arent allowed to see each other...
2006-10-01 16:18:33 · update #2
WE ARE NOT PLANNIN ON HAVING BABIES NOT EVEN THINKING ABOUT IT.... i love how sum of you think you know us... but alot of you are giving me alot of GOOD advice thank you i really appreciate it...
2006-10-01 16:29:32 · update #3
Well sweetie, if you are intimate in any way, and it's consented by you, it won't be statatory. he can be arrested, but not held or charged if they can't prove it and if they want to test you for intercourse, you can refuse it by your own rights. But, here's to the point, he can move out if he wants to, but his dad does have some consent in the matter. even though he is 18, he is still not a "full adult" he won't be until he's 21. If you want it to work out and still be with him, you guys need to really get priorities straight. If you both love each other so much, going to his mom's won't matter because you'll still be together. my husband is in iraq and we still love each other and can't even see each other. but, why don't you just wait until he graduates to pursue this? he will have more say in his life at that time than now. try to work around it, but if his dad is so controlling, maybe he has the problem you should be asking about.
2006-10-01 16:12:48 · answer #1 · answered by beautifulsweetheart20 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yess when your 18 you can live wherever you want,,,College is a great way to get out of the house and better yourself,, its called a dorm. When your 16 no you cannot live wherever you want!
And 17 is the age for it not to be statutory rape! Refrain till your legal or how about refraining from sex until your emotionally stable? Sounds like your going through a lot and might be mistaking caring for the real thing.. Just be sure and wait till your older. But why grow up so fast? If your parents are offering refuge from a bad situation then its room and board,, not room board and sex right???? Trust me if it is the real thing called love it will be there when you are of age.
YES if he has a friend who will let him stay with them, Yes he can finish out school. I did it!
PS Why are you EVEN thinking having sex is a good thing at 16? Think of your boyfriend!
But HIS father can't bring the charges up only yours and the county Prosecutor.
Is that a risk you both want to take??
Remember life is hard you can never have your cake and eat it too!
2006-10-01 17:06:21 · answer #2 · answered by kitkatish1962 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When I was 18, I was paying my own rent, living in my own apartment and working to pay for my first year of college.
It is "statutory" rape if you are a minor, which you are in 99% of the states.
Your boyfriend needs to finish high school and then go forward with his life, or join the military get a GED and earn a trade.
If he is 18 he is, by law, an adult and can do what he pleases; keep in mind his parents no longer have to support him, he can be held to legal standards for being an adult... and what stands out in my thoughts are your parents are asking you questions because they know he should not move in, and if you push them, they will say "no"; they don't want to make you their enemy.
Odds are you will not marry this man (check out the statistics for your age group); I do not doubt you believe you love him, but the writing is on the wall this is doomed (I know I probably sound like an evil parent or something, I'm only talking from how I felt at 16 and the first "bite" of puppy love hits you believe is real and strong enough to last forever, unfortunately, it just doesn't).
2006-10-01 16:19:58 · answer #3 · answered by D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone so far is correct with their answers, but maybe you should take more time and consider if moving 2000+ miles is the best decision for you and your future. Do you have a scholarship at that PA school? If not, then why go? Oregon has some good colleges too (although USC would be your best bet! ;-) Your mom is not right, but I have a feeling she's worried about you wanting to move across the country just to be with your boyfriend. When you have a teenage daughter, you will understand!
2016-03-27 01:37:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Between 18 and 21 is a grey age. But generally 18 is an adult.
It would be terrible if his dad brought fire down on him in the form of a rape charge.
You and your mom could probably initiate an underage marrage for you to him that his father could not stop. While you are doing that you need to be like Ceaser's wife .. above suspision of sexual contact. More for his benefit. This varies from state to state.
if this happens of course he will be disowned and on his own, which is very hard at 18 or really any age.
I would suggest watching "the lake house" and waiting ... it will be hard, but much can happen and you both might change.
in any event, good luck
2006-10-01 16:19:51 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know where you are from, but in Florida if the minor is sixteen or older statutory rape charges have to be filed by the parents of the minor unless the other party is more than three (or two right off hand I don't recall) years older than the minor. If the older person is more than three (or two) years older the States Attorney can chose to press charges under the lewd an lascivious or sexual predators laws. In some states the fact that you are only sixteen is negated by the fact that he is still in high school. The laws vary from state to state, but I believe that in most states if the parents of the minor have more weight than the parents of the person who is of legal age.
2006-10-01 16:11:09 · answer #6 · answered by zaffaris 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't quote me on this but, I believe that once you are 18 years old you can move anywhere and live anywhere you like. As for the rape case, I think that either you or your parents would have to charge him that. I can't help but wonder why his father is bothering him so much. Maybe you should figure out what the problem is there and try to work it out.
2006-10-01 16:09:47 · answer #7 · answered by Heather M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
so you have been together for one year and a half...hmmmmmm and you were how old when you two met?????????? I truly think your parents have been great to you by allowing this dating to go on at such an early age. Smart by giving you an answer such as they have which gives them a way out of saying, "Yes, dear, he may come and live with you". They are kind, most parents would probably have given you an ear full of nasty words. As far as, is he old enough to live anywhere he wants, i thought also that the age for boys was 21 years old. I believe also that you are rushing into a lot of things. (hopefully you are using protection). If he is working i am sure he can stay with anyone as long as he pays rent. Staying with someone wears out after a while, we get tired of someone just living there and not doing their share etc etc etc. It is not just your small world of being home and holding hands, it is a big responsibility being on ones own and having someone to take care of as he would have to do for you . Don't rush into things, you are very young and two years from now.....................things change......If you do as you please and don't take anyones advise here, let us know what happened and how you are feeling a.........................year from now......then two years later.....enjoy your young life, no one says don't like him, don't date him or even love him............JUST DON'T LIVE YOUR LIFE SO FAST.
2006-10-01 16:48:59 · answer #8 · answered by OXOX_4_U_Dhurba_n_Nepal 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are truely in love with each other then those two years will fly by. His father is only looking out for the interests of the two of you. If indeed, your boyfriend were to be convicted of rape then it would be a really long time before you two could live together.
2006-10-01 16:09:48 · answer #9 · answered by San Diego Art Nut 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a person of 18 is an adult. He can live where he wants to. But if he does, his parents do not owe him anything. This is a very big step, and it would probably be better for him and his dad to work out the relationship, rather than messing it up at this point.
2006-10-01 16:08:15 · answer #10 · answered by world traveler 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋