Last night, I went to go and watch a show some friends were putting on. It was in one of the worst (think ghetto) parts of town, and while I was looking for a parking place (right across the street from the show), I was confronted by four guys in a car. One of them jumped out, obviously looking to get into a fight with me. Worried that I could really get hurt, I drove off and ended up going home knowing that if I parked my car, something could have happened to it. Luckily, they didn't follow me because I wasn't sure exactly where I was.
As I think about it today, I'm totally pissed!! I have always wanted to help people in need and was brought up thinking that people who are less fortunate should be reached out to. Now I'm not so sure. I know that not everyone who lives in that part are bad people, but the guys in the car don't deserve my help. Call me a biitch if you want, but this is going to make me think twice about reaching out in the future. F%$& them. Is this wrong?
2006-10-01 13:57:49 · 10 answers · asked by Billy 3 in Social Science ➔ Economics
I believe the fact that it bothers you to not get involved makes me think that you haven't given up on humanity. I, too, have that need to help people in need, but there are limits. I worked in social services and I understand compassion fatigue. The reality is there are some people who don't want, or -- dare I say -- don't deserve compassion. When you extend your hand to help and it is spit upon, or -- sometimes -- bitten, I have learned to walk away.
There are so many people who want our help. I've learned to discern the difference between the grateful and the ungrateful. Don't sweat it. No matter how you try to shake it off, you will always be available to the deserving.
2006-10-01 14:14:45 · answer #1 · answered by mediahoney 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have learned from experience, that sometimes, if you offer your help to the less fortunate, that they have a way of manipulating you in order to get what they want. This people you encountered, probably don't work and have nothing better to do, than waiting for some guy like you to get your butt kicked and ripped of. I am not saying it's like this all the time, but I understand where you are coming from and no, it's not wrong to feel this way. I would too.
2006-10-01 14:34:39 · answer #2 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Thugs don't necessarily deserve your compassion, but how about the poor people stuck in the neighborhood with these thugs who don't have the option of going home to a safer place? You exercised wisdom in getting out of there, but this incident isn't about not having compassion for the unfortunate. It's just about realizing that dangerous, unfamiliar neighborhoods are not the place to be alone at night, even if your friends are putting on a show there.
2006-10-01 14:11:42 · answer #3 · answered by just♪wondering 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's why people these days are so reluctant to help people less fourtunate than themselves. People can't decide who is worth helping.
The individuals who jumped out at you make their neighbourhood look bad. Don't let a few bad seeds ruin it for the rest of the people trying to make a living and get by. Everyone needs help at times, and if anything, what these guys did is further proof that they need help.
2006-10-01 14:17:08 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Try to separate out the wackos from those who are truly in need... I know it's difficult, because you'd like to think that people would return your affability and good intentions... No one expects to be brutalized without good reason; I certainly cannot blame or fault your sense of being violated and terrorized; I'd only importune for your eventual reassessment of humanity, despite the fact that we are a ludicrous species - all at once beautiful and repugnant... Those who CHOOSE to love the better part of humanity, do so despite the episodes of sheer repulsion. It is sad that you're losing heart for your fellow human... and, to be sure, understandable... but remember: that even those most vile amongst us also have a story and "rationality" - however maligned & distorted & cretinous.
I know this next statement is also one that a goodly portion of people find hard to accept, but please consider it fully before dismissing it out of hand: We, collectively speaking - the society "at-large," all have some degree of culpability in the creation of the monsters that inhabit the recesses of our existence...they are indeed our failures to create a more perfect union, come back to haunt us. This is NOT to imply that they don't ultimately bear the full responsibility for their acts of commision and ommission - like the rest of us, but we are guilty of letting the disheartened, disenfranchized, disillusioned, and dysfuntional "slip through the cracks." Thus, they avoid 'early detection' via sustained meaningful dialogue... Ewing, bak in the 1970's, predicted this social sickness and gave it the term of the Autonomy-Withdrawl Syndrome. We are NOT a "somatically connected" people, nor do we seek to truly remedy the problems that are at the heart of the malfeasance you encountered... we all need to "keep the faith," or we will lose the battles and the war for the healing of the human heart & mind.
I invite you to visit my group's blog for some worthwhile "food for thought," at blogspot.com:
http://collectiveintellect.blogspot.com
I'm glad you were courageous enough to use this venue to express your feelings honestly... there are many who are all to ready to jump all over this sort of display of somatic health. But your question/ feelings are valid ones that need to be addressed in a fair manner... hope my responce approached this need to be heard... I fear that maybe you only needed a "sounding board" & NOT someone, like myself, "pontificating" about what is wrong with our society (Sorry 'bout that!) but I have the problem of being a "Mr. Fix-it."
2006-10-01 14:51:24 · answer #5 · answered by cherodman4u 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I understand those feelings exactly !!!
I had a similar occurrence.... I now figure THEY got themselves into that way of life mess.. they can get themselves out ! I don't ask for help if i get in a pickle...
I no longer do for the idiots who DON"T have it coming. If these morons would only realize a little kindness goes along way, soon their lives would turn around but they don't care to change so why bother !!
*high five* with your attitude !!
2006-10-02 05:41:48 · answer #6 · answered by Kitty 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Like this: you want to be certain who you're. even as someone asks some thing, do not imagine, in simple terms answer. in case you sense undesirable about the answer, no longer you. in case you do not: you. in case you sense uncomfortable and so on...and so on....and so on.... So, you in simple terms favor to flow through existence, do what contains options, and then (and in elementary words then) are you able to quite take excitement in it :) good luck <3
2016-12-04 02:54:37 · answer #7 · answered by scacchetti 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Billy, Billy, Billy, this question almost makes me think you are actually a human. I was begining to worry that all you could ask were stupid irritating questions on Yahoo Answers. Now that you have had your moment will you please return to the Stupid A** questions you have become so popular for. I'm almost dissapointed. I need a laugh.
2006-10-02 10:04:16 · answer #8 · answered by MellyK1234 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's a completely normal feeling in today's world. I'm sure there are tons of people that feel the same way!
2006-10-01 14:06:23 · answer #9 · answered by Melie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not really, i would've done the same thing you can't always fight someone.
2006-10-01 14:12:47 · answer #10 · answered by Donovan G 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋