I am 14 and am going out w/ an 18 yr old. He wants 2 sleep w/ me and i'm scared of 2 things: 1- i'll get pregnant and 2- he'll leave me once he gets what he wants. i feel pressured, but i love him and dont want 2 lose him.
2006-10-01 10:34:14 · 26 answers · asked by roxy_volcom_chick 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
No. You should NOT have sex. If he loves you he wouldn't pressure you into something you are not ready for. Additionally, an 18 year old should not be dating a 14 year old. You two are in two completely different stages of life and for many, many reasons are truly incompatible at this time in your lives. Your parents should not allow you to date an 18 year old and if you were my daughter you would not be dating anyone yet. Proof that you are not old enough to date?: you are not mature enough to realize it is okay to say "NO" and if by saying "NO" you lose your boyfriend... good riddens.... better off without him.
In most states, since he is 18 (an adult) and you are 14 (a minor) a crime called "statutory rape" will have been committed if you two have sex together. In fact, his mere attempt at having sex with you is most likely a crime, "corruption of a minor", among others.
I see 14 year old pregnant girls often in my line of work (ob/gyn ultrasound tech) and most of them thought they'd never get pregnant. And you know what? Their boyfriends are nowhere to be found..... She has to deal with the baby on her own... or abort it.
Do the most mature thing you've ever done.... break up with him NOW.
Good luck.
2006-10-01 10:43:55 · answer #1 · answered by Yinzer from Sixburgh 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are (and I'm sure you've guessed this already) far too young to begin to have sex. Really, a good rule of thumb for sex is this: are you prepared for the possible consequences, like pregnancy and childbirth? Do you have the financial resources to support such a responsibility as a child? And when I say you, don't mean the 18 year old. If your answer here is no...then you aren't ready for it. Because even if you use pills, condoms, diaphrams, etc, there's always a chance that pregnancy will happen. And unless you can afford the risk, it would be wise not to do it.
Another thing is this. If your boyfriend really loves you, you won't lose him because he wants to have sex. If he does say he'll leave because you won't have it, then he doesn't love you. He just wants sex. Period.
Tell him to be patient and wait until you are old enough and financially responsible.
2006-10-01 10:41:25 · answer #2 · answered by WillBib 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Honey...you are not ready, so don't do it. If you are having any doubts at all, you are definately not ready. Pregnancy and losing this guy aren't the only things that could happen. You could get a disease, which most STD's don't go away...ever. You are stuck with it the rest of your life. Also, if he does leave you, the emotional pain he leaves behind will scar your soul. And have you considered the fact that he is over age and you are under? That is statitory rape. They call it that for a reason. He should know better!!! If he loves you, he will wait with you, otherwise, let him go! You have the rest of your life to be with someone in that way. Enjoy being young while you can and avoid the complications that come with being sexually active.
2006-10-01 10:40:44 · answer #3 · answered by cita8200 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wow your really young and hes older you know he could go to jail for going out with a 14 year old cause your not legal yet and if you love him then don't sleep with him and if he really loved you he wouldnt want to get in your pants i think its just sex that he wasnt cause most guys do they only think about that one thing and once they get it the relationship is over usually so dont do it and your really to young to be having sex anyways wait until you older if you had sex now you would regret it cause i did i had sex at 14 and i regret it badly and there are consequences when you have sex without using pretection and i'm now 18 and almost 4 months pregnant i should have waited but i didnt its gonna be hard raising a baby and it would be really hard on you if you became pregnant at such a young age and if you feel pressured you dont need him you dont need any guys right now you have plenty of time to think about guy's you may love him but in time it will get better it always got better for me well good luck
2006-10-01 10:59:53 · answer #4 · answered by CountryGirl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't do it.....I am 97% sure you will regret it. My own personal opinion is to wait for marriage. You've already stated you feel pressured thats not the way it should be.......
And remember that song..good things come to those who wait. If you ask him if he would just leave you if you were to get pregnant or just a couple weeks after the act it is likely he would say that he wouldn't. But lets face the truth here and that is people lie. He might not think that he would but when faced with the pressure or guilt it could be another story completely.
2006-10-01 10:43:58 · answer #5 · answered by rainsparrow 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're right to be scared. Read your question again, this is a textbook classic of sex ed. Don't fall for pressure and become another statistic. If he can't respect you, then he's no good. It's more than a cliche, it's the truth that it can wait. Wait until you honestly want to have sex and are capable of dealing with consequences. Otherwise you will get burned.
2006-10-01 10:44:48 · answer #6 · answered by erythisis 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you are questioning whether or not you should have sex, then you are not ready. The only reason a 14 year old would be interersted in a 18 year old is for the sex. Don't let him, or anyone for that matter, use you or convince you to do something you don't want to do.
2006-10-01 10:42:35 · answer #7 · answered by Hot Pants 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweet heart you are only 14 and he is 18... You should date a 15 or 16 not a 18. He should be dating 18 or mre older... He is gping to use you and when he gets tired of you he is going to kick you out to the curve... EFIL
2006-10-01 10:36:28 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to say that all 18 year old boys are looking for is a piece of tail......I was in your same position and decided to sleep with my older boyfriend and guess what....he left after I lost my virginity to him......14 is very you to have sex for the first time....at 14 do you think you are ready to have a child...people shouldn't have sex unless they are willing to live with the consequences.....I would try to find someone my own age to date...if your boyfriend is pressuring you that much to have sex...chances are he is in it just for the sex...becuase if he loved you ....he would wait for when you were ready....
2006-10-01 10:38:17 · answer #9 · answered by Victoria 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First of all your very young to be thinking about having sex. If you do decide do it, do it because YOU want to do it and not because your afraid to lose your boyfriend. If he really loves you, he will understand and wait without pressuring you. Please protect yourself if you decide to do it. Make him wear a condom regardless of what he says. Remember if something doesn't feel right maybe it isn't the right time for you. GOOD LUCK
2006-10-01 10:39:03 · answer #10 · answered by Angie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋