my mother and i are both ill,she at eighty and me at fifty but she seems absolutely determined not to acknowledge my illness-i wonder if older people feel that because they are ill that they have carte blanche to ignore other people's needs
2006-10-01 09:38:17 · 15 answers · asked by Patrick O 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
Old people suddenly become very self absorbed- I work with them and recently when heavily pregnant- they thought nothing of asking me to put there shoes and socks on for them- i'm a podiatrist!) even though I could barely get down to the floor and the first thing they said when I told them I was expecting- congratualtions- no- it was - well who will take your place!?
They become obsessed and dare I say ecited about doctors appointments and its like winning the lottery a trip to the hospital- really they are very selfish people - they seem to revert to a childlike state!
I hope you are feeling better soon- take no notice of your mum- they are all the same!
2006-10-01 09:45:18 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋
Perhaps she is in denial. She is an old lady and if she were to start fretting about you unduly, she would then have to start worrying about what will happen to you when she dies. Perhaps she feels that she could do without that sort of worry. You don't say what your respective illnesses are, but I was closely involved with the case of a very old lady who to the end would not admit the fact that her son was suffering from very serious mental illness because she simply couldn't manage to take the worry of it all on board in addition to coping with her own ailments.
2006-10-01 16:51:04 · answer #2 · answered by Doethineb 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
None of us know how things will turn out in the future.
As children our Parent's normally do all that they can for us. When we age we never know what help and assistance we may need. If we have a choice none of us would want to be dependant upon our offspring, however at times it is essential, and therefore a children we need to help and do what we can, whilst we can to assist them.
In your situation of also being unwell, cannot you enlist the help of other relatives, friends, social workers, etc. even if only to relieve you of the responsibilities that you have for a short while. I am sure that this would help you.
Believe me, I do know where you are coming from. I wish you all the best. God Bless.
2006-10-01 16:45:44 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It may be that it takes all your mother's energy trying to cope with her own illness.I'm sure you don't expect your 80 year-old mum to nurse you,or do you?At 50,you class yourself as a younger person,well,obviously you are younger than Methuselah,but theres not a lot in it.lol.
2006-10-01 16:51:03 · answer #4 · answered by michael k 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do understand what you mean. But when my mom is sick, she would tell us that it's time for the children to take care of her since she took care of us when we were kids. But then again, we're not sick.
Maybe your mom just really need someone to be there. She is getting older and probably can't move as well as you do. Just keep helping her. It's good karma.
2006-10-01 16:42:59 · answer #5 · answered by dewdropinn 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm............ Ive got MS but I dont need my parents to acknowledge it to know that I've got it !.
So what if someone you know doesnt react in the way you expect....... doesnt make them a bad person - although I agree a nod occasionally does go a long way.
However, what ive got is my problem and I dont expect my parents to alter there lives around me. they've got their own lives to live out.
2006-10-01 17:19:40 · answer #6 · answered by Jon H 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is not because your mother is OLD that she does not acknowledge you illness, maybe she never was one for showing a lot of concern for others, some people are like that, age does not bring it on. !!!!!!!!!!!
2006-10-01 16:46:44 · answer #7 · answered by Dolly Blue 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have little regard for your mother otherwise you would not seek to get her criticised on this site. At eighty perhaps her powers of reason are weakening a little....come to think of it yours are as well!!!
2006-10-01 16:44:07 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Quit your BITC**N.
She took care of you when you couldn't.She fed you,clothed you,
made sure you got an education.Quit griping and tell her you are sorry and that you love her.No matter what her shortcomings are.
Peace
2006-10-02 03:31:13 · answer #9 · answered by azfab4fan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sort of when you were a baby and she had to put her needs aside to take care of you because you were dependent on her. How selfish of her to expect the same from her son, a grown man.
2006-10-01 16:42:29 · answer #10 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋